Walking After You
by KaoriVenna
Summary: White. That was the first and last thing he could remember before it all went black. 8059. M for language, violence, fluff, OCC. Lemon in future chapters.
1. Prologue: Black

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059 3

**Beta'd by: **ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Hey guys, this is my first attempt at writing fanfic so please be kind. Its unbeta'd, and all comments welcome just please be nice. Id appreciate any kind of tips and ideas on how to improve as well.

***REPOST*** I reposted this chapter after it was beta'd*-*

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Walking After You

Prologue: Black

White.

That was the first and last thing he could remember before it all went black.

His breath came out slow and raspy as laid there on the cold floor, ignoring the loud ringing that echoed throughout his ears. He felt nothing, nothing at all, his body was numb, but somehow he knew it hurt, he knew that something was terribly wrong. But why couldn't he feel it? Slowly he opened his eyes only to glare slightly at the dark smoke and cloud filled sky that gloomily welcomed him.

'Huh? Wait… smoke?'

He sat up quickly, only to double over gasping out as his body regained its feeling, sending tremors of pain over and over throughout his aching body. With his face placed roughly between his knees, his silver hair fell around his face, he bit his lip, and slowly took it all in. The sharp pain that his right side screamed, now revealing a large gash that was bleeding freely, the limp unmoving ache his right arm pulsed as he tried to raise it, and the undeniably unbearable pounding his head echoed loudly as he tried to grasp his situation.

He stayed this way for several minutes, gasping for air, as his left arm franticly trembled between his right side and arm trying to comfort the pulsing pain somehow, to give himself some kind relief, but failed at every attempt he made. He shivered unnaturally as he felt something cold and wet slid down the back of his neck and sides of his face. He sat up slowly, grimacing with pain as he did, as his left hand instinctively investigated this cold sickening sensation that he now flowed further down his back and onto his chest.

'Blood, a lot of blood.' He stared at his pale almost translucent hand, the sight of it made him sick to his stomach.

'This isn't good at all.'

He blinked quickly, trying to focus his eyes to get a look at where he was.

'What the fuck is going on? What the hell happened to me? Where am I? How the hell did I get here?'

These questions only bounced around his head causing it to ache even more. So instead he quickly looked around for the answers, for something, anything that would let him know where he was and what was going on.

He could see he was in some sort of building or what used to be one, since it was now reduced to rubble and him being in the midst of it. He was sitting in a small hole, that obviously wasn't meant to be there, about two feet or so in the ground. The edges of this hole was littered with pieces of the buildings remains, some of which still burned with a dull lit flame. He could taste and see smoke as it hazily filled the area, causing his eyes to water slightly. He could definitely smell gun powder for sure, it overpowered anything and everything else that lingered around him and stung at the back of his dry parched throat.

'What the hell happened here? An explosion maybe?'

Not being able to get a satisfied look of his surroundings by sitting on the ground, he weakly struggled to get up. Using some of the debris that had fallen around him for support, he finally pulled his self up, groaning and gasping loudly as pain continued to shoot through his body with every move.

He felt completely drained, his feet were heavy and what few steps he was taking felt like hundreds. Panting heavily he stumbled, his vision blurring, to the nearest thing he could use for support and crashed into it, putting all his weight on it as he did. His right arm dangled limply at his side as and his left arm was now tightly clamped over the gushing wound on his side.

Now that he was up and moving he could feel the same cold wet sensation running down his leg and arm now. Squinting his cloudy green eyes he looked himself over and cursed out loud at his horrid appearance.

'What the hell-!'

His head, abdomen and arm were obviously bleeding freely, and he could see now that he was covered head to foot with numerous cuts and scrapes that burned and stung as they too seeped blood. He had to be honest with himself, he looked like shit. His clothes were not only dirty, tattered, ripped, and singed, but covered in blood as well. The light blue shirt he wore was now a dark purple, and his jeans were just as equally disgusting and torn.

He felt even sicker now, but willed his self to continue moving.

Slowly and steadily he began to make his way out of the hole, resting on anything he could on his way up. He chuckled darkly to himself looking at this small hole he was struggling so hard to get out of. He was almost out, but yet the top seemed so high and far away. He gritted his teeth hard as his entire body ached and pulsed with pain. Every gasping breath he took shot pain through his chest and he could slowly feel his lungs and chest filling with blood. The constant pain, it was almost more than he could bare. Panting heavily he finally collapsed on the edge of the small hole with a loud groan as he pulled his self onto the cold concrete of the buildings' ground level floor, leaning heavily on some fallen debris.

He stayed there for a moment, catching his breath. He honestly had no clue what was going on or how he ended up in this situation.

'Fuck! Why? Why can't I remember?' He couldn't remember anything at all. His mind was blank, all he could see was white.

Further frustrated now, he looked about his surroundings once again. Ignoring his blurring vision he stumbled forward only for his feet to catch on something, sending him lurching forward hard onto the cold floor. Not only did he not have the strength to stop his self from hitting, but both his arms, one being completely useless, and the other tightly clamped over the wound in his side, were occupied. He groaned out in pain as his face roughly made contact with the cold rigid concrete, causing him to bite his tongue. He could taste it now, the slick iron taste of his blood as it slowly filled his mouth.

'Disgusting,' he spat out weakly, but it didn't get very far, creating a string of saliva mixed with blood that now clung to his dry lips.

He laid there groaning, his eyes boring into nothingness as they focused on anything in particular; exhaustion was beginning to take him over.

'This is pathetic.'

He didn't even have the strength to flip himself over, let alone get up and walk out of there.

'Is this it? Am I going to die? Like this? In some random unknown building?'

He gasped loudly, taking in a sharp painful gasp of air, coughing and choking on the blood that continued to fill his mouth. His eyes were now registering what he had been staring at but not truly seeing.

It was a leg. A few feet in front of him was a human leg. He gasped as he released his wound in order to push himself up, straining his neck and causing pain to shoot down his back, as he did so. His eyes widened as he slowly scanned up the leg, following it, until he was staring at the person the leg belonged to, laying flat on his stomach just like him, a person that was dressed in a once nice suit, a person that was unmistakable dead.

His breathing was now coming out short, fast, and wet as it painfully left his lungs. He stared horror stricken at the dead lifeless man before him. Franticly he scanned around him; his stomach dropped and his eyes widened even further: he was not alone. There were at least four others scattered about the area, and they all, too, were dead.

He closed his eyes tightly and looked away, forcing his face into the cold concrete, coughing roughly and spitting out blood and saliva, as he forced down the nausea's feeling that was slowly creeping up his throat.

'What the fuck is going on? Who are these men?' he asked himself once again, squeezing his eyes tightly as he tried to recall how he ended up in this situation. But nothing came. 'Why… Nothing?'

He let his eyes relax now, drowning out the loud pounding in his head he focused on the sounds around him instead. Small clatters as pieces of rubble fell here and there, the crackle of flames that were slowly burning out, a soft whoosh and ruffle of the wind that blew dirt in his face and his hair messily, a far away yell he couldn't make out, a yell…

His eyes snapped open and he froze as he listened more intently. The first yell was soon followed by another yell, but it was louder this time, closer? He focused on it as the sound got closer and closer, louder and louder. He soon could tell that it wasn't just one voice yelling, but several now.

What was that? Footsteps? Wrenching his head from the ground, he franticly opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out, his throat was too sore and dry. He stiffened slightly as he heard a loud clatter near, followed by a thud and then an angry growl. He once again tried to speak, but again nothing. He could hear the voices now, louder, yelling, yelling the same thing over and over.

'What is it?'

He couldn't quite make out what they were saying. Well, he really didn't care what they were saying as long as they found him, as long as someone found him, as long as he didn't die here like this, alone, surrounded by these dead men he didn't know.

The voices now sounded like they were just on the other side broken building now.

'Here! I'm here!' he screamed franticly in his head, thrashing his body from side to side to move, but again nothing came out. 'I… not like this'.

Tears began to swell up in his eyes as he opened them wider, panicking now, feeling all his energy draining away by the second.

'MOVE dammit!' he screamed at himself, forcing his working arm to pull and drag his body somewhat forward. Tears were now streaming down his face in pain and frustration as he tried to force his body to move further, faster.

Footsteps, he could hear them so clearly now. He squinted hard, forcing his eyes, willing them to see. There they were, three blurry figures on the other side of the room, just beyond the hole. He couldn't make out their features, but he could see that two were maybe average in height, he couldn't tell for sure, and the other was quite tall. He focused on them, watching them as they split up and swiftly went about the room, looking over its contents, while yelling that same phrase he heard them yelling before, he could make it out clearly now.

"Gokudera!"

"Octopus-Head!"

"Hayato!"

They would see him… right? They had to.

'I mean, I'm right here'.

In his last and final attempt to be found, his voice finally released, a low raspy groan, followed by a loud thud that belonged to a rock he weakly threw.

'They had to hear that,' he thought, dropping his head to the floor once again as exhaustion took him over and he closed his eyes, his left arm still stretched out before him.

In fact his low groan echoed throughout the room loudly, drawing the attention to the other three. Immediately the room went silent, only for it to erupt with the yells of the three unknown men.

"Gokudera!" one frantic voice yelled.

"We found him!" another voice yelled farther off, as if he was calling to others. "Over here! Hurry to the EXTREME!"

The moment he heard them yelling, a sense of relief over took his body. He was found.

He heard the loud clank and scrapping of metal hitting concrete as someone rushed over him. A pair of strong hands roughly grabbed his shoulders and turned him over. He gritted his teeth hard, letting a low guttery groan escaping his lips, while pain shot through his body once again as he was turned. He felt those large hands pull him up slightly into someone's arms as this man cradled his body gently. He could faintly hear the voices of the other two in background yelling about.

'Warm, it's so warm…'

"Hayato!"

Those arms that he laid in were so warm, so familiar that his pain was soon forgotten and numbed as their warmth flowed over him.

"Hayato! Hayato, can you hear me?" the man yelled franticly, as one of the man's hands wondered about his chest and abdomen tugging at his shirt, examining his wounds."Shit… Hayato?" His loud voice was filled with anxiety and terror as he spoke. But why did it sound so soothing and familiar to him?

Opening his eyes weakly, he caught a hazy glimpse of the man who cradled him. The man's dark black hair, his large brown eyes, eyes that were brimming with tears and filled with fear.

At that exact moment two things went through his head.

One, who was this man? This man that held him so gently yet so tight in his arms, this man who had tears running down his face now, who was he?

Two, who was Hayato?

Then it all went black.

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Please Review and tell me what you think^^

Any tips and or ideas on how to improve are appreciated!

Thanks and see you next chapter!


	2. Chapter One: Two Weeks

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Hey guys! Thanks so much for all you reviews and suggestions! So heres the first chapter, its a bit long sorry. Hope it doesnt disappoint! Ive actually written up tp chapter three so far, just some editing to do, so I should be updating soon. Enjoy!!^-^

'...'=Thoughts

"..."=Speaking

_this_=Backflash

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Walking After You

Chapter One: Two Weeks

"_-yato..?"_

_There was that voice again. Though this time it was much gentler than when he had heard it last._

"_Hayato? Can you hear me?" It called again. "He's waking up."_

"_Ill go get the doctor." A different voice stated quickly._

_He shifted slightly, as his eyelids weakly brought themselves open to stare at a white unfamiliar ceiling._

"_Hayato!" The voice cooed in relief, exhaling heavily._

_He blinked quite a few times before turning to the voice. His eyes struggled to focus on the face of the person beside him, seeing a small smile grace the caramel colored skin of the vaguely familiar man. Hes seen this man somewhere before. 'Where..?'_

"_How do you feel?" He asked him, his brown eyes filled with concern._

_Ignoring the man's question, he brought his hands to embrace his aching head, discovering his right arm encased in a cast. 'What….?' He stared at it. 'How? When did he…?'_

"_H-Hayato?…." The man asked anxiously, rustling the sheets as he huddled closer to him "Are you-"_

"_W- where am I?" He interrupted him, squinting his eyes tightly as he tried to recall what happened to him. His head pulsed dully along with the rest of his body, as the memory slowly filled his head. Oh that's right, he remembered now. The crumbling building, the pain of his wounds, the dead men around him, this man, his warm arms. _

"_W-who..who…are you? He asked strangled, his eyes wide with confusion, as he continued to grip his head, his cast scraping roughly against his cheek._

_The man next to him gasped sharply freezing immediately. _

"_Who are you?" He asked again. "W-who…..am I?" He struggled to get his words out his voiced laced with panic. _

_The man paled instantly, he stumbled back from the bed, his face distorted in horror as he gaped at him. _

"_Who am I?" He asked the man in a strangled whisper, his eyes brimming with tears._

Gokudera Hayato's eyes fluttered slightly as he woke, though his eyes remained tightly closed. He had no desire to wake up yet. Instead he listened to the subtle noises around him, noises that he had become accustomed to over these past two weeks. The same steady repetitive beeping of the hospital machines he was connected to, the faint sounds of women and men talking outside his door, footsteps as they sauntered past his room, some quick and some slow, and then the most familiar of them all, the light husky breathing of the man currently sleeping in a chair in the far corner of his room.

Sleep slowly flooded over him again as he matched his breathing with the mans, inhaling and exhaling. Out of all the things Gokudera had discovered and learned these past two weeks, was that listening to this man's breathing, weather he was asleep or awake, was the only thing he found calming, the only thing that oddly felt familiar to him. Eyes still closed, Gokudera inhaled deeply and began his now daily routine of gathering his thoughts.

Approximtaly two weeks ago he was involved in a very serious 'accident', in which he was rushed to the hospital and woke six days later. He was now suffering from several small cuts, scrapes, and brusies, a severe concussion, a broken right arm, three broken ribs, a very bad wound, which was now stitched up and healing, on his lower right side, oh and amnesia.

Gokudera sat there, his eyes wide with shock, when the doctor asked him what his name was. He remembered the feeling his face felt as it lost what little color it held along with the sickening twist in his stomach, when he realized he didn't know. The doctor hastily looked between his nurse and assistants before barraging him with several more questions: If he knew where he lived, his birthday, the date, where he was. His body went numb as he couldn't recall any of these things. Not one of them. It was all black.

After a few tests and more questions the doctor told him he was suffering from Post-Traumatic Amnesia, which was most likely caused from the severe concussion he had received. To the relief of his doctor, they discovered it was just his 'personal identity memories', his doctor called them, that he had lost. That he still retained the memories of how to function regularly, such as how to eat, dress his self, operate a computer and so on. His doctor went on telling him there was a possibility he may never regain his former memory. Memories of his childhood, memories of last year, last month, memories of who he was. Though he had no problem remembering waking up in the demolished house and the events that followed, but anything before that was just blank. His doctor tried to reassure him saying that there too was the possibility of him regaining all or partial of his memory, but judging by the look behind his doctors eyes, even he didnt believe the words he spoke. Though this wasnt the only shock he received that day.

A wave of uneasiness took him over as two boys, one being the one he had woken to, and a child stood in his room, waiting patiently, as he tried to remember their names. Noticing Gokudera's obvious discomfort as he franticly searched his empty head for their names, the familiar taller of the two broke the awkward silence and introduced his self as Yamamoto Takeshi. Gokudera clearly recognized his voice, of coarse it being one of his only memories now. It was unmistakably the voice he remembered yelling from 'that night' as he held Gokudera in his arms, and the first voice he heard when he woke. Yamamoto smiled kindly at Gokudera, who didn't miss the pained expression that flashed across his face, as he shook his hand.

The other boy followed in suite. His name was Sawada Tsunayoshi, he had big round amber eyes and tall spikey brunette hair. Gokudera also recognized his voice being one he heard yelling from 'that night'. Tsunayoshi too smiled at Gokudera telling him to call him Tsuna for short.

The small kid, who remained silent most of the time, was called Reborn. This kids appearance was enough alone for Gokudera to process, he wore a nice black suit with a matching black and orange fedora, it was also to Gokudera's surprise that atop that fedora sat a small green….what was that a chameleon!? He utterly thought he had lost more than just his memories but possibly his mind as well, when Reborn introduced it as Leon.

Seeing Gokudera's face fill with questions, Tsuna briskly explained to him that they were all friends and went to the same school called Namimori Junior High. They along with some others, he would meet later he was told, had been the ones that found and brought him to the hospital. Gokudera glanced briefly at Yamamoto, the only face he remembered that night, and received a small nod in confirmation.

Reborn then took the stage, overwhelming Gokudera the most. He told Gokudera he was a mafia hitman known as Hurricane Bomb Hayato. He was loyal to the Vongola Family, who Reborn, Tsuna, and Yamamoto happened to be members of. Tsuna being the Tenth Generation Boss, Reborn being Tsuna's tutor and best hitman ever, Yamamoto being the Rain Guardian, and he Gokudera Hayato being Tsuna's right hand man and Storm Guardian.

Gokudera sat silently staring blankly at the three, waiting for them to laugh, to tell him they were just kidding. 'The mafia?! Storm what? Come on …he couldn't be…Its like a bad movie.' He chuckled lightly looking between the three waiting for them to join in, it was only when they didn't did he some what believe them, though he still wasn't entirely convinced.

'I mean they'd have to be pretty sick bastards to fuck with someone who couldn't even remember his own name……right?' He continuously told his self.

Reborn continued on, telling him that he was born in Italy and had a step-sister named Bianchi. Apparently he had recently moved to Japan on Reborn's request, in joining and aiding Tsuna in becoming the Tenth Generation Boss. Yamamoto thus ended off explaining to him that he had been injured in a explosion, which was a result of another rival family that had ambushed them. Thus leading to the current predicament he now found his self in, laying in a hospital bed beaten up with no memory of who he was.

Not knowing what to say or how to react to things they told him, he quietly laid there, nodding his head so they knew he was listening.

Yawning quietly Gokudera brought himself out of his thoughts and back to reality. He slowly opened his eyes and glanced around his small white room, his eyes grazing slowly over the small table filled with get-well-soon cards and flowers he had received from friends and acquaintances he couldn't remember. His eyes stopped and rested on Yamamoto as he continued to sleep peacefully. His sort black hair was sticking up and out in every possible direction, eyebrows were relaxed above his eyes that fluttered slightly but remained closed.

'How the hell could anyone sleep like that?' Gokudera thought, one eyebrow raising slightly in wonder as he observed Yamamoto's odd position.

Yamamoto was to tall to sleep comfortably in the medium sized chair, but he did the best he could. He laid flat, his back on the seat cushion, with his head propped vertically against the back of the chair, as his chin rested on his chest. His left leg and right arm were draped over the armrests and his right leg was stretched out upon the floor reaching as far as it could go, while his left arm was tucked tightly to his side.

'What an idiot.'

Gokudera stared at him for sometime, watching his chest rise and fall with each breath, his lips were slightly parted which gave his face quite a content look to it. Mesmerized by Yamamoto's peaceful appearance his thoughts drifted to just how much he had become accustomed to Yamamoto's presence. Though its not like he really had a choice to get used to him or not. Considering he never left, not once in the twelve days Gokudera had been hospitalized. Yamamoto ate here, slept here, only leaving his side for minutes at the most to bathe, a courteously he was granted from the nurses, or speak to his doctors and Tsuna, who brought his change of clothes and school work.

He found his self constantly wondering why Yamamoto went to such lengths for him, from what he understood they were just friends, though Gokudera could deny the strange feeling he felt around the man, the feeling that they shared some kind of deeper bond, deeper than the bond that he shared with Tsuna or Reborn.

Yamamoto wasn't bad company, but he wasn't good company either. He remained very patient with Gokudera, doing his best not to pressure him. Gokudera took notice to how careful Yamamoto was around him, never speaking to loudly, how he took notice to every groan of discomfort or sigh Gokudera let slip past his lips, asking him if he was okay or in pain. How gentle he was when he touched Gokudera, as if he would break, when he needed help getting up. Gokudera soon overcame his embarrassment and found his self wishing Yamamoto would stop treating him like he was going to shatter any second.

Yamamoto told Gokudera about their day to day lives, how he smoked, his devotion and loyalty to Tsuna, his obsession with dynamite, that he was very smart and did well in school, that he played the piano but never heard him play personally, how Yamamoto loved baseball, the other members of their family, about the Vongola rings that they both wore and how they fought for them. Gokudera quietly listened during these times, not that he didn't have anything to say, he in fact had plenty to say, but most of them being more questions, but just couldn't find the energy to ask them.

Since he couldn't remember any of these events or experiences, he instead decided to close his eyes and try to imagine them, acting them out in his head as Yamamoto told them, hoping that this would trigger something and he would remember them for his self. Yamamoto took notice of this, and was assured by Gokudera, when Yamamoto stopped speaking, that he wasn't sleeping and if he could please continue.

Gokudera had only received one other visitor beside the brief daily visits from Tsuna and Reborn, who still attended school during the day, and the constant supervision from Yamamoto. His name was Sasagawa Ryohei, he slapped Gokudera's shoulder and shook him roughly, yelling loudly in his ear to 'Get better to the extreme!!' Which resulted in the one and only time he met the loud white-haired youth, for he was quickly ushered out of his room shortly afterwards by his disgruntled nurse and a wide-eyed Tsuna, who both scolded him for being too rough and loud. It was only after he left that Gokudera realized it was Ryohei's voice that he also heard 'that night'.

Later that day he overheard his doctor telling Tsuna and Yamamoto that they should take it slower with him and try not to overwhelm him any further with meeting so many new people. Though he didn't really mind all together, he was still trying to grasp meeting Yamamoto, Tsuna, and Reborn as it was anyways, but he couldn't help his self from wondering, about his parents, his step-sister…where were they? Did they know about his condition? How many more friends did he have?

He asked Yamamoto this and he told him that his father, who he wasn't on good terms with, lived in Italy. Bianchi, who was furious for not being able to visit now thanks to Ryohei, lived with Tsuna and Reborn. Yamamoto, who decided it was best to have Bianchi tell Gokudera about his mother, noticed the look in Gokudera's eyes as he understood why Yamamoto didn't mention anything about her.

It soon became quite obviously that not over-whelming him was a thing that couldn't be avoided. The first few days had been the worst. Since he was still heavily drugged and getting used to everything, they went by fuzzily. But he couldn't forget the obvious anxiousness and awkwardness that Yamamoto radiated as he tried to make chit chat and comfort Gokudera.

Every morning the room was filled with an awkward tension from both Gokudera and Yamamoto, as neither of them voiced the identical questions that passed through their heads. _Does he remember anything? Or did he forget it all again? _

The second question Gokudera feared the most. He struggled to fall sleep each night fearing he would wake once again only to forget everything. He constantly racked his brain over and over with what Reborn and the rest had told him. He engraved it into his mind, forcing his self to never forget. He would then only fall asleep from exhaustion, after listening to Yamamoto's steady breathing. But he still woke every morning feeling like he hadn't slept at all, which resulted in him drifting off to sleep throughout the day.

A light chuckle brought him once again, out of his thoughts as he stared at the still sleepy brown eyes that stared back at him.

"Do you intend to glare at me all morning Hayato?" Yamamoto asked kindly with a tired smile as he shuffled his position sitting upright in the chair, stretching his arms and yawning as he did so.

Hayato.

Gokudera noticed this first off. Yamamoto was the only one, besides his nurse and doctor, that called him Hayato.

'Why?' He wonder every time he heard it, for two reason in particular he couldn't bring his self to ask Yamamoto. One being he felt slightly embarrassed about asking such a trivial question and two being the strange feeling his stomach fluttered every time Yamamoto said it. Not that he minded being called Hayato, it just made him curious.

"I-I wasn't glaring!" Gokudera spat out quickly blushing slightly as he turned away. "I was trying to contemplate on how anyone could sleep like that."

"You can sleep anywhere if your tired enough." Yamamoto answered simply, smiling to his self and glancing at Gokudera out of the corner of his eye.

"Sleep yeah that's something you need more of," Gokudera huffed, now glaring at him, "Judging by those bags under your eyes you aren't getting as much as you seem to be." Gokudera accused him staring at the said dark bags that rested under Yamamoto's eyes.

"Maa Maa…"Yamamoto dismissed his statement waving his hand as he yawned again.

"Tch..Whatever." Gokudera huffed again. "I told you before you don't have to stay here with me, you know." Gokudera told him pulling his self to sit upright now. It was true, numerous times he told Yamamoto that he didn't have to stay night and day with him, that he could go home and sleep, to go to school. But Yamamoto profusely refused, telling him it was no big deal, that he didn't mind, that he had no problem doing his homework here. Truthfully he didn't want to admit it, but he was secretly thankful that Yamamoto didn't leave. He had become so used to Yamamoto constantly being with him, he wouldn't know what to do with his self if he was left alone.

Yamamoto turned away from Gokudera and busied his self with opening the curtains. Ignoring the feeling of Gokudera's eyes boring into his back, he pulled them open bathing the room in the dull gray light of yet another cloudy day. Yamamoto glared slightly at it before turning back to Gokudera, who was still staring at him, waiting for his response.

Yamamoto tilted his head to the side, smiling as he looked at him. "I said it was fine didn't I."

'That damn smile again eh?' Gokudera thought annoyed, as he watched Yamamoto walk into the restroom, closing the door quietly.

'Idiot.'

Don't get Gokudera wrong he was truly grateful for the support he received from Yamamoto, but he wasn't blind. Over the past days he had become quite accustomed to the way Yamamoto moved, and found that it was quite easy to recognize his mood by the certain movements he made, and he could clearly see his amnesia was taking a toll on Yamamoto as well. He watched day by day as those dark circles grew darker, not to mention the obvious exhaustion that he was starting to suffer from.

He never really considered how his amnesia would affected other people, until he started to notice it, the small signs there were all giving him. The way Tsuna shyly skittered around him, trying to hide his obvious uneasiness with laughter and smiles, how Reborn just silently watched him, his eyes glinting a look of pity mixed with concern every now and then, and the way Yamamoto's eyebrows seemed to be constantly furrowed as if he was in discomfort.

Noticing all this only made Gokudera feel even more anxious and uneasy than he already did to begin with. He felt guilty and frustrated for not being able to remember anything. For not being able to remember them. For not being able to remember him.

A slow depression began to over take Gokudera as his mind remained blank. He remained even more quieter than usual throughout the last few days, not really listening when Yamamoto spoke to him, and feeling even more guilty when Yamamoto realized he wasn't listening, and continued speaking as if he hadn't notice. But he did, he took notice to the sudden change of Gokudera's personality almost immediatley, his heart aching painfully everytime he looked at Gokudera. Seeing the bags that began to form under his eyes as well, his face growing paler by the day, the fullness of his plate when his nurse came to retrieve it, how he would just stare at the t.v his eyes obviously not focusing on it but something much further, something that Yamamoto couldnt see.

A small knocked tapped lightly against his door seconds before it opened. Gokudera's nurse came in carrying two small trays, one for him and one for Yamamoto, of their breakfast. She smiled widely at him.

"Good morning Hayato, and how are you feeling today?" she asked him kindly, setting the trays on his bedside table.

"Uh fine I guess." He said dryly, taking notice to how his name didn't sound as nice as when Yamamoto said it. 'What the-!' He felt heat rush to his face as he realized how naturally he thought of him.

Said man splashed cold water several times on his face before staring at his reflection in the mirror. Anyone with eyes could see that he was obviously exhausted, not just physically but mentally as well. For someone being so tan, his face was pale and haggard, and his eyes lacked any kind of spark that they once might of held.

He couldn't deny it, he barely slept at all these days. He would make his self comfortable in his chair to sleep, but found his self watching Gokudera instead, who struggled to sleep each night tossing and turning constantly. It was only when Gokudera would finally pass out from exhaustion that he would finally drift to sleep, only to find his self jolting awake when Gokudera would inhale sharply or groan in his sleep. 'Ho, Hayato wasn't kidding these bags are huge.' He ran his hand over his face, poking the bags lightly. 'Hayato…' He sighed dropping his head limply, as he grasped the edge of the sink tightly.

"_Ehh Yamamoto are you sure?" Tsuna asked peering at him, his eyes full of concern. "I'm sure my mom wouldn't mind me missing some days of school since its for Gokudera and all, we can take turns. Oh and Shamal said he would too."_

"_No you don't have to do that." Yamamoto answered immediately. "The doctor said we shouldn't introduce him to anyone else yet anyways." Yamamoto reminded him. "No, its fine. Really. I want to stay. I need to stay. I cant just leave him, not like this." Anguish filled his voice as he spoke his last words._

"_But Yamamoto you need to get some rest-"_

"_Its fine. I'm fine," He reassured with a haggard smile, "Really I promise."_

_They stood alone in the hall just outside of Gokudera's room. Tsuna could see that he wasn't going to be able to convince Yamamoto otherwise._

"_Alright then." Tsuna broke the silence softly. "Ill bring you some clothes and your homework later."_

"_Thanks Tsuna." Yamamoto said gratefully, for both the favor and that he had given up on convincing him to go home._

_Tsuna bit his lip nervously as Yamamoto turned to the closed door "Ah..uh Ya-Yamamoto..?" He treaded carefully watching Yamamoto, who stiffened, his hand freezing on the door handle._

"_Y-yeah Tsuna?" Yamamoto responded quietly, not turning to Tsuna, fearing the question his body knew he was about to ask. The same question he had asked his self over and over since Gokudera had woken up._

"_Um..Ar-are you going to tell Gokudera? You know a-about you and him?" Tsuna quickly asked._

_It felt like hours before Yamamoto finally answered._

"_No." His voice echoed flatly in Tsuna's head, before he opened the door swiftly and entered the room, closing it quietly behind him, leaving Tsuna standing alone, gnawing his lip, and wishing he had never asked the question to begin with. _

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Phew! So long, sorry. So tell me what you all think.

I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading^^


	3. Chapter Two: True Smile

**Rated:** M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah, don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Once again thanks fo all the reviews! I love them all! Angst, angst and some more angst.

* * *

Walking After You

Chapter Two: True Smile

When Yamamoto opened the restroom door Gokudera was sitting patiently in his bed, his food tray ready in front of him, as he received his daily medications and painkillers from his nurse. Gokudera's eyes quickly shot up to Yamamoto's before returning back down to stare at his uneaten food.

"Oh Good morning Takeshi." The nurse called to him as he walked to the chair, grabbing his food tray on the way.

"Good morning." He replied back to her.

Gokudera groaned in annoyance seeing the bright fake smile Yamamoto greeted her with. She glanced up at him "Are feeling alright Hayato?" She asked him kindly. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Yamamoto stiffen at her question, Yamamoto's face he was sure, was full of concern.

"The needle." he lied, motioning to the needle that was currently being injected into his arm. Yamamoto's stiffened position relaxed immediately and he began to eat.

"Oh you should be used to this by now." She smiled at him softly, while he ignored her. "You will be beginning your sessions with the hospital's psychiatrist in a few hours, so try and get some rest until then." She told him, withdrawing the needle.

Gokudera's head snapped to her, his hair whipping him in the eyes, while Yamamoto's chop sticks froze in his mouth, both of them staring at her.

"Psychiatrist? I'm not crazy!" He blurted out in disbelief, feeling a little offended.

"Yes I know you aren't my dear, no one thinks you are." She soothed him, "The doctor approved you for release in a few days, but he thought it was best if you talked briefly with the staff psychiatrist before you left."

"O-oh….Ok," He let out, a little relieved that they didn't think he was crazy.

She gave Gokudera a quick smile while jotting down a few things in his chart before she left closing the door quietly, leaving the two boys in an odd silence.

Yamamoto watched Gokudera carefully who stared blankly in front of him.

He was going home. He was going home. He was leaving. No more nurses, no more needles, no more white barren walls, no more of this suffocatingly small room, no more Yamamoto….. He would finally be able to go home, to go to school, wait… where was his house? Where was his school? Where was Yamamoto's house? Was it nearby? Panic gripped his body as he thought it about it. He gripped the bed sheets tightly as his head began to spin.

"Hayato?" He heard Yamamoto's voice echo in his head.

He didn't answer him, his hand now gripping at his chest, twisting and grabbing the fabric tightly, as his breath came out in quick short gasps which painfully left his chest. His eyes filled with tears.

"H-Hayato..?" Yamamoto's voice rang out concerned, it was much closer this time.

Again he didn't answer him. He closed his eyes tightly, his tears overflowing, as his head spun faster now. He could hear his heart rate monitor ringing out loudly, quicken its pace from the steady rhythm it usually played. Yamamoto froze glancing franticly between Gokudera and the number on the monitor that continued to raise. Not knowing what to do, or what was happening to Gokudera, he reached for the nurses button and pressed it repeatedly.

Tears were freely flowing down Gokudera's face when Yamamoto, not knowing what else he could do, wrapped his arms around Gokudera and pulled him into his chest, who without hesitation, buried his face in Yamamoto's shirt. Gokudera's hands roughly grabbed hold of the material of Yamamoto's shirt and pulled at it tightly.

Yamamoto bit his lip hard, choking back his tears, as held Gokudera's violently trembling body closer as he gasped for air and sobbing harder, soaking Yamamoto's shirt with his tears.

'Oh for how long had he wanted to hold Gokudera like this'. Though it most defiantly wasn't under these circumstances he had hoped it to be. Yamamoto couldn't help but think that since the moment Gokudera had woke up, how badly he had wanted to take Gokudera in his arms and hold him, hold his hand, touch him, anything to feel him. He soon found it was more painful than he had imagined it would be, as he suppressed his desire to touch Gokudera each day.

Seconds later the nurse entered, waking Yamamoto from his thoughts, and swiftly pried Gokudera off him and gently, yet firmly pushed him back into the bed. He resisted her and tried to sit up, only to get pushed back down again, in which she quickly adjusted the oxygen mask onto his face.

Yamamoto paled even further, his mouth open in horror, as he watched Gokudera gasp and pant for air, tears spilling from his panicked eyes which shot franticly in every direction. Never had he ever seen anyone, let alone the stubborn feisty Gokudera Hayato, look so fragile and so frail, like he would break with even the gentlest of touch. He bit his lip harder, almost drawing blood, as his heart ached painfully.

He was drawn out of his stupor, when a arm reached out and grabbed his sleeve, gripping and pulling on it roughly, causing him to stumble forward slightly. He quickly grasped this pale hand, that desperately seeked comfort and gripped it tightly, entwining their fingers. The nurse quickly injected something into Gokudera's arm, whose body stiffened, and then slowly relaxed as the drugs began to take effect.

Yamamoto's firm grip remained, as Gokudera's breathing slowed and finally began to return to normal. He looked to the nurse, who waited to answer the question Yamamoto's eyes were obviously asking, until Gokudera's eyes had finally closed.

"A mild panic attack." She told him simply. "Nothing to seriously worry about. Its quite common, especially considering what he's gone through." She noted, nodding her head in Gokudera's direction as she spoke. "But its highly recommend that they be avoided, they could cause serious problems for his rehabilitation process if he continues to have them."

Yamamoto, not being able to find his voice, simply nodded at her.

"It was most likely a result at the news he would be going home soon." She informed him, answering the question Yamamoto was currently asking his self 'why did this happen?'

"After all this place is currently all he knows, it must be quite scary and stressful for him to think of leaving it. Ill be back to check on him soon." She announced softly, getting the fact that Yamamoto wanted to be left alone.

Yamamoto nodded again. She couldn't have left faster in his eyes, the moment he heard the door latch shut, the tears he could no longer hold in, streamed down his face. Still gripping Gokudera's hand and him still gripping onto Yamamoto's, he slowly fell to his knees dropping his head down as he landed on the tile. His free hand quickly grabbed hold of the near by trash can, and pulled it to his face, as he felt nausea creep quickly up his throat. He choked slightly, wiping saliva from his lips and pushed the now filled trash can from him. Closing his eyes, he slid back resting his head upon the hospital bed, his arm still held above his head, he squeezed Gokudera's hand weakly.

"_Um..Ar-are you going to tell Gokudera? You know a-about you and him?" Tsuna quickly asked._

Tsuna's question rang in his head.

He wanted to. Oh how he wanted to tell Gokudera, to tell him everything. How could he though? It was painful enough as it was that Gokudera couldn't remember him. It would be even more painful if Gokudera didn't except the news. Yamamoto wouldn't be able to take that, it would surely break him.

'This is enough, as long as I can remain by his side. Even if it means being just his friend, its enough.' Yamamoto's eyes slowly drooped and finally closed as he fell asleep still clutching Gokudera's hand.

"So I heard you had a panic attack earlier today?" The hospital's physiatrist, Tachibana Reiji, asked Gokudera. "And that you had this attack shortly after you learned you'd be released soon, is that correct?"

"Y-yeah.." Gokudera admitted quietly shifting uncomfortably in his chair, as he quickly glanced at the clock. 'Fuck..' Ten minutes. He had only been in here ten minutes so far.

He vaguely remembered what happened. He remembered his nurse telling him he would be going home soon, then he couldn't breath, and it hurt, and then Yamamoto was holding him. Next thing he knew he was waking up in a daze, his hand held in a death grip with a another's, who he discovered belonged to Yamamoto, who was asleep awkwardly propped up against the bed on the floor. Gokudera decided it was best not to wake him and instead laid silently still holding his hand, until his nurse came in, waking Yamamoto who scrambled up quickly, when she opened the door loudly to retrieve Gokudera for his appointment.

He felt his face heat up as he remembered the feeling of holding Yamamoto's hand, his arms around him, his warm chest, his smell…how nice it felt, how familiar it was.

"Most panic attacks are usually triggered by stress, or extreme overflow of emotions." Tachibana stated, pulling Gokudera out of his thoughts, "Would you like to tell me about it?"

Gokudera looked away from him, he was quite uncomfortable at voicing his thoughts and feelings to a complete stranger. Even though he's being doing that every day for the past two weeks, it was different than from talking to Yamamoto and the others. They were strangers to him, but he wasn't a stranger to them. Even he didn't understand his own thought process, he just didn't like it.

"Not really." He finally answered bluntly.

He heard the click of a pen followed by the sounds of pen on paper as Tachibana wrote notes in his notepad. Gokudera slowly felt sweat begin to form above his brow and on his hands.

"You know Hayato.." Tachibana said softly, scooting his self to the edge of his chair, getting closer to Gokudera. He reached out his hand and placed it on Gokudera's leg, giving it a quick squeeze. "I know this must be very hard for you, I cant even imagine, losing so much of your memory.."

"All." Gokudera interrupted him, crossing his legs, knocking the mans hand off, while throwing him an icy glare.

"Excuse me?" Tachibana asked confused, reluctantly retracting his hand.

"All. I lost _all _my memory." Gokudera said his voice flat.

"Y-yes.." Tachibana coughed clearing his throat. " From what I've been told from your nurse you haven't been eating and sleeping that much lately, is that correct?" He added diverting the conversation.

Gokudera's eye twitched. 'Is that correct?' Gokudera was already sick of hearing that phrase.

"From what she's told me its seems you are possibly starting to show signs of mild depression." He went on when Gokudera didn't answer.

Gokudera didn't deny it. 'Of coarse I am you bastard. Why the hell wouldn't I be depressed.'

"I'm going to write you a prescription to help with this, but I would prefer if we could find another way to avoid this." He handed Gokudera a small slip of paper, who took it carefully into his hand. "I also heard that you have a quite devoted friend, is that correct? If you cant talk to me, perhaps you would feel more comfortable speaking to him instead." He continued on, walking Gokudera to the door. "Same time tomorrow then." He smiled at Gokudera patting his back, which caused him to shudder slightly.

"O-ok.." Gokudera answered squeezing past the man and out the door, cursing the fact he had three more days of this.

"It was horrible Tsuna…"

Gokudera came to a halt recognizing Yamamoto's voice. He quietly edged up the hall stopping before it spilt into another.

"I didn't know what to do…." Yamamoto continued his voice pained and winy.

Gokudera carefully and slowly poked his head out until Yamamoto and then Tsuna came into view. Yamamoto was sitting up against the wall, his arms covering and hiding his face that hung limply between his legs. Tsuna was hunched over and him patting his back comfortingly. 'Shit..' Gokudera almost gasped out loud when his eyes made contact with two black round orbs which were staring right back at him. It was Reborn, who was quietly standing at Tsuna's feet. Reborn being so small, Gokudera didn't even see him, and most likely wouldn't have to begin with, if Yamamoto hadn't been sitting on the floor. He quickly withdrew his head panting slightly, as he waited for Reborn to give him away.

"Its not your fault Yamamoto.." Tsuna's voice reassured him "He's fine now, right?"

"Y-yeah, he's okay now," Yamamoto answered bleakly, "But what if it happens again or because of something I did?" Yamamoto's voice echoed loudly in the hall, his voice was filled with a mixture of fear and anxiety.

"Ah Yamamoto I don't think it was something you did.." Tsuna squeaked to him quickly. "The nurse said it was because he got stressed cause he'd be going home right? He just needs time to adjust."

"But-" Yamamoto protested.

"Why would you think you would cause it?" Reborn asked abruptly.

Gokudera twitched, adjusting his head at a better angle to hear. It was always rare when Reborn spoke.

"I-I just...."Yamamoto searched for the right words, "I think maybe because I'm annoying him."

"I don't think that its." Tsuna retorted quickly.

"I'm just so afraid that something else is going to happen to him again that I'm suffocating him, I can't help it. Its Hayato. I just want to be able to help him some how…."Yamamoto's voice trialed off to a whisper.

"Yama-ahh OW! Reborn! That hurt!" Tsuna exclaimed loudly, followed by the sounds of him possibly jumping up and down grabbing his leg in pain. "What the hell was that for..?" He mumbled grumpily before falling silent.

Taking advantage of the silence that now filled the hall, Gokudera stepped out into it, clearing his throat loudly when only Reborn took notice to him.

"Hayato." Yamamoto stated matter of factly, quickly standing up, almost hitting Tsuna in the head as he did.

"G-Gokudera!" Tsuna exclaimed throwing Yamamoto a quick glance before trotting over to Gokudera. "H-how long have you been there?"

"What are you talking about I just came around the corner." He lied realizing from the look in Reborn's eyes that he had no intention of giving him away, he had wanted him to hear that.

"O-oh.. Ok then, lets get you to your room then." Tsuna went on leading Gokudera to his room.

"I-I have to go get this prescription." Gokudera said showing them the slip Tachibana had given him.

"I can go get that for you." Yamamoto stated, stepping forward to take the slip, in which Gokudera quickly pulled to his chest, out of Yamamoto's reach.

"N-no I-its alright I can do it myself." Gokudera answered quickly avoiding Yamamoto's eyes, who looked slightly crest fallen.

Gah! It was embarrassing enough that he had had a stupid panic attack, it would be even more embarrassing if they found out he was taking anti-depressants too. He was sure it would only make them worry about him even more than they already did as well.

Yamamoto was just about to open his mouth to speak when Gokudera's nurse's voice echoed loudly through the hall. "Is that a prescription you need Hayato?" she asked striding up to him. "Ill go get that for you dear, you just go get some rest now."She held her hand out for the slip, Gokudera handed it to her somewhat reluctantly, she took it smiling at him, and was gone.

It was now nighttime, Gokudera and Yamamoto sat silently in the room, neither of them had said one word to each other since earlier that morning. It was awkward, but at the smae time Gokudera was greatful for the silence. It gave him time to think. He was constantly replaying the conversation he overheard over and over in his head, while watching Yamamoto attempt to do his homework.

'So he thinks he is annoying and suffocating me?' Gokudera bit his lip. He couldn't deny it. Yamamoto had be most defiantly been starting suffocating him, which resulted in Gokudera being annoyed by him, but….

Gokudera sighed loudly.

"Yes Hayato?" Yamamoto asked gently, not looking up form his papers.

'He never changes.' Yamamoto thought happily to his self. He had known Gokudera long enough by now to know when Gokudera had something to say but was to embarrassed to say it out loud. He would always do this when they had a fight or something, sighing loudly, to get Yamamoto to break the silence first. Yamamoto couldn't help but smile to his self.

"I-I..uh", Gokudera ruffled his hair as a small blush began to creep across his face. "T-thank you." He said loud and quick that made Yamamoto chuckle.

"You don't need to thank me for anything Haya-"

"N-no I mean thank you y-you know for today fo- for holding m-m hand and all…" Gokudera trailed off, not looking at Yamamoto, as his face was now a dark shade of red. "A-and I don't think your annoying or anything..well maybe just a little…but I-its fine so don't worry about stupid things like that. Y-your helping me a lot, really more than I could ever ask for," He exhaled long and loud finally finishing, his face he could swear was glowing red now.

Silence.

"Well say something dammit!" He spat at Yamamoto who was just staring at Gokudera with a shocked look upon his face. 'So he heard us…'

"Y-your welcome Hayato." Yamamoto finally spoke, smiling at Gokudera, whose turn it was now to stare in shock, for he was witnessing the first true smile he had ever seen upon Yamamoto's face. He blushed even deeper as he found his self thinking just how well the smile suited Yamamoto, how attractive it made him. He couldn't help but hope that he would see more of them.

Yamamoto couldn't control his self any longer and soon found his self at Gokudera's side wrapping his arms around him once again. "Your welcome Hayato." He whispered huskily in Gokudera's ear causing a shiver to run down his spine. A shiver that he didnt mind at all, which caused his stomach to flutter lightly.

"Ah what..Y-ya-Yamamoto.." Gokudera stammered embarrassed, as Yamamoto squeezed him tightly before releasing him and retreating back to his homework.

If Gokudera thought his face couldn't get any redder, oh boy was he wrong.

* * *

As always tell me what you think! Hope you enjoyed^^

Gokudera gets released from the hospital next chapter, yay!!


	4. Chapter Three: Sushi and Friends

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Ahhh another chappie! Thank you so much for all your reviews! I really love them. I'm sorry if I haven't thanked you personally for your review, I've been such a scatter brain lately^^ Oh yeah theres some minor Haru bashing in this chapter, so sorry if I offend anyone. Oh and also some HibarixTsuna cause I feel like it^^ Sry for any errors that I missed as well!

* * *

Walking After you

Chapter Three: Sushi and Friends

So here he was now, Yamamoto waiting patiently at his side, as he paused, his hand hovering over the door knob of 'his front door.'

What an unusual busy day he had.

He woke that morning feeling more tired than usual, barely remembering falling asleep that night. The fact that he'd be leaving the next morning pulsed throughout his body, causing him to toss and turn all night. Yamamoto looked about as tired as Gokudera felt when he woke that morning as well. They both remained silent, only speaking to each other when it was necessary. It took awhile for him to finally be discharged. His nurse briefly explained to him when to take his medications, and that he'd need to return to get his stitches and cast removed soon, while Yamamoto listened quietly behind them. With his get-well-gifts in hand and bag of medications tucked safely at his side, he stepped outside and gazed at the bright sun filled sky. Gokudera siged contently, feeling the sun on his skin. Yamamoto's breath left him momentarily as he gazed upon Gokudera. The sun gently caressing his pale ivory skin, his hair shinning brightly reflecting the sun in every strand, the spark his eyes shone as he inhaled deeply parting his lightly tinted pink lips slightly. Yamamoto gently bit at his lip, resisting the urge to press his own lips against the soft supple ones he desperately missed, before directing Gokudera in which way they needed to go.

They moved at a slow stop and go pace for various reasons. A.) Yamamoto didn't want to rush Gokudera. B.) Gokudera was to busy studying his surroundings to actually see them. Yamamoto's hand gently held onto his arm, pulling and maneuvering him out of the way of poles and objects he had repeatedly almost collided with, chuckling and commenting "Do you want to end up in the hospital again," the entire way.

'So this was the city he lived in.'Gokudera made sure to study ever inch, every building, he passed, taking notice to anything he could easily recognize, making it a marker in his head for future reference, in case he ever got was snapped out of his distraction as his face made contact with the back of Yamamoto.

"Tch. Say something if your going to just stop like that." He snapped rubbing his nose.

"Aha….I'm sorry." Yamamoto chuckled "But we're here." He added pointing to the sign that read 'Take Sushi'. Gokudera recognized the name, he heard it many times from Yamamoto, this was Yamamoto's looked at the sign in confusion with a slight frown.

"I thought we were going to my house?"

Yamamoto smiled at him, sliding the door open. "Just a quick stop".

Gokudera was about to retort but found his self flinching, almost dropping the bag in his hand, as 'WELCOME BACK GOKUDERA!!' was yelled by many various voices from inside the face clearly said that he was surprised, which pleased the others, as he was gently pulled inside by Yamamoto, who he could hear chuckling lightly again.

There was one word to describe his current emotion at this time, and that was self-conscious. He shifted and twitched uncomfortably feeling all there eyes on him. He could feel his face heat up, as his body temperature slowly rose, sweat forming at his temples. Yamamoto cleared his voice quietly, as if telling Gokudera it was ok. He reluctantly looked out into the large crowd of people, recognizing Tsuna, Reborn, and Ryohei only. Tsuna gave him a reassuring smile as their eyes met, before Gokudera was bombarded by hugs and pats on his back by the others, all of them saying some form of 'Welcome back Gokudera' or 'Good to see you back'.

Even though he found his self feeling extremely awkward and overwhelmed, he couldn't help but smile a little. All these people, even though he had no clue who they were, seemed so happy to see him. He relaxed a little.

Tsuna rushed forward and began introducing Gokudera to the others, in which he began wishing he had a note pad, to write all their names down, or at least a camera. How the heck was he going to remember all them, though he was glad to finally put some faces to the people in the stories Yamamoto told him.

First was his step-sister Bianchi, who hugged him tightly causing him to winch in pain. He decide it was best to not ask her why she was wearing goggles. Mostly due to the sudden feeling of dread that shook through him, telling him he didn't and shouldn't see her with out them on. Also because she was viciously beating a man, who Tsuna whispered to him was named Dr. Shamal, who had be continuously launching his self at Bianchi, his lips puckered and arms spread wide. The blood stained man briefly introduced his self, after he was knocked to the ground hard by a kick from Bianchi, before jumping up and launching at her again. Gokudera cringed as the man was sent flying to a table.

Next was Ryohei, now knowing him to be what Yamamoto said was the 'Sun Guardian', and his sister Kyoko, along with another girl named Haru, whose voice seemed to pierce his head painfully. He was soon skittering away from her in fear of losing his sanity. Then it was Tsuna's mom, she hugged and smiled at him kindly, making him relax even more. She was flanked by two children who were running circles around her. Lambo, who sported a giant afro and cow printed suit. He laughed at Gokudera calling him 'Stupid-dera', before he was swiftly kicked in the head by the other child yelling at him "Lambo don't be rude!!"

'So annoying...' He gritted his teeth, strongly wishing it was him that was kicking Lambo instead. At this moment he also realized bitterly that Lambo was the 'Thunder Guardian' of their family. The other child introduced herself, 'A girl!', as I-pin, whose head was disturbingly tall and bare with just a short tail like braid at the top. She bowed to him politely before rushing after Lambo again, who was now jumping on the tables knocking some drinks over in the process. 'Stupid cow'

Gokudera blinked at the girl now standing in front of him. She wore a green school uniform, her shirt exposing her mid-drift, with a odd eye patch covering her right eye. She was holding, what Gokudera could only describe as, a trident.

"T-this is for you…" She mumbled quietly holding out a cup filled with punch.

"T-thanks.." He took it from her. The moment he had it in his hand she was gone, briskly walking away from him. Guessing from a description Yamamoto had told him, her name was Chrome Dokuro, the 'Mist Guardian'. He shook his head deciding that now wasn't the best time to try and comprehend the long story Yamamoto had told him about Chrome and Mukuro at this time.

It was when he was receiving some sushi from Yamamoto's dad, who happily introduced his self, Gokudera taking notice to the fact that he addressed him nonchalantly as Hayato as well, when a bored voice droned from behind him, "Gokudera Hayato." Gokudera stiffened and turned around slowly. He was greeted by an intimidating icy dark glare from a dark messy haired boy, who looked around his age, wearing a school uniform and jacket.

"Y-yeah.."Gokudera couldn't help but stutter slightly. 'He's glaring at me!! What the hell is this guys problem!'

The boy just stared at Gokudera, who instinctively felt the urge of wanting to retreat backwards, as the boys eyes bore hard into his own, but he remained firmly in place. With an annoyed huff and glare the boy turned and walked away, mumbling something that sounded like "Stupid herbivore, ill bite you to death later…"

"Hibari Kyoya." Yamamoto told Gokudera, causing him to realize he was and had been, standing next to him the entire party. Gokudera gave him a 'holy shit you've been there the whole time and I didn't even know' look followed by a 'ooohhh ok' look, recognizing Hibari's name meaning he was the 'Cloud Guardian' of their family.

Gokudera watched Hibari as he retreated from the party and choked hard on his drink when he saw Hibari, who was passing Tsuna at the time, grab Tsuna ass and give it a quick squeeze before continuing on out the front door. Hibari's face wore a smug smirk, as he was quiet happy with the blush and loud squeak he received from Tsuna, who glared after him muttering "Ahh jeez H-Hibari…" under his breath. Yamamoto just patted Gokudera's back, helping him swallow his drink properly, saying amusingly, "It is what it is."

"Do you carry that with you everywhere?" Gokudera asked suddenly, motioning to the tall skinny bag on Yamamoto's arm, which contained his Shigure Kintoki, currently in its shinai form. Gokudera had taken notice to it earlier in the hospital, when Yamamoto mentioned it once, but never asked him about it. He only became more curious when he noticed how Yamamoto wouldnt even put it down during the party.

"Yep." Yamamoto answered simply "You never know when your going to need it."

"Hn." Was all Gokudera could respond beofore he was introduced to a boy named Fuuta, who nearly gave Gokudera another panic attack when he called him 'Hayato-ni'. Thankfully his shock subsided when he heard Fuuta call Tsuna the same thing. Last of the bunch was a tall blond man, who stumbled and tripped almost constantly, named Dino. He was the tenth generation boss of the Chiavorone family from Italy, and one of Reborn's former students.

So now back to the present. Gokudera took a deep breath before turning the key, unlocking the door, to his let the door open all the way, as he gazed at his apartment, before he slowly stepping inside, until he was standing in the middle of his living room.

It wasn't big, but it wasn't small either, judging by the size he lived alone. He inhaled the smell of cigarettes and gun powder. The smell of the cigarettes seemed to calm his nerves. Where as the smell of the gun powder, sent a shiver down his spine as an image from 'that night' flashed through his head. He quickly shook the image out of his mind.

A small green couch rested in the center, where he stood, in front of a fairly large flat screen T.V, that was positioned up against the opposite wall. Dark red curtains covered a fairly large window to his right. He noticed several bookcases that lined the walls, packed with books and papers. 'He liked to read...?'Off to his left, lead into the kitchen, then a small short hall which lead to the bathroom and bedroom.

Still clutching the bag of his gifts he turned to the sound of shuffling feet, Yamamoto was still standing in the doorway outside, watching him. He suddenly felt self conscious, and bit at his thumb.

"Well are you gonna stand out there all day or are you coming in?" He asked Yamamoto, who didn't hesitate to enter, closing the door behind him. They stood there, both of them looking everywhere but each other. 'So…what now?'

"I- Ill put your things over here.." Yamamoto finally spoke, taking the bag he carried to Gokudera's small kitchen table.

"R-right..," Gokudera mumbled following in suite and setting his bag upon the table as well. He made sure to keep his medications out of Yamamoto's sight, fearing he'd see his anti-depressant. Staring around his unfamiliar apartment, Gokudera continued to wonder about the room, walking down the hall to the bathroom and bedroom.

Yamamoto didn't, no he couldn't take his eyes off Gokudera. He hadn't since they had left the hospital. Everything seemed to go much better than he had anticipated. Of coarse he had profusely refused the 'welcome back party', fearing it would be too much for Gokudera to take in, and possibly cause another panic attack. But his protests were silenced when Reborn commented 'This is Gokudera we are talking about, he'd be angry at you for thinking of him as being so weak.'

Yamamoto disagreed, Gokudera would be furious, not angry. But this wasn't the Gokudera they all knew two weeks ago. Not that they weren't the same person, they were, but right now Gokudera was, as much as he didn't want to admit it, he was weak. This Gokudera, who he was watching explore his bathroom, had no clue about anything they were involved in, especially anything to do with the mafia. There was still so much more that Gokudera didn't know, including their travel and battles they participated in ten years in the future. Yamamoto left this story out on purpose, that would be way to much for Gokudera to believe in his current state. Gokudera still didint know about the Pastinaca family, the family that had ruthlessly ambushed them, and that they still lurked about their town, waiting for another chance to attack the Vongola. That worried Yamamoto the most. How would Gokudera defend his self if he was suddenly attacked by them. Yamamoto would have to make sure they would never get the chance to.

Yamamoto unconsciously followed Gokudera, leaning up against the doorway of Gokudera's bedroom, as Gokudera opened and closed his dressers doors peaking inside them before moving to the closet where he stated, his voice amused "I think I like belts." Like was an understatement, Gokudera practically gasped in disbelief as he opened the closet to find a large portion of it filled with belts.

This made Yamamoto laugh. Gokudera's stomach did a back flip as the sound of Yamamoto's laughter filled the room. He quickly peeked his head out from behind the closet door, causing his stomach to flutter more violently as he caught sight of Yamamoto, his face with a full grin upon it. Gokudera felt his face blush immediately and withdrew his head quickly before Yamamoto could see. Gokudera retreated, after making sure his face was back to its normal color of pale white, and faced Yamamoto, who had regained his self and was smiling sheepishly at Gokudera.

"Ah well its g-getting l-late I-i guess I b-better get going." Yamamoto told Gokudera, his smile disappearing.

"Oh...yeah your right." Gokudera said, feeling slightly disappointed.

There was a brief awkward silence before Yamamoto turned heading to the door, with Gokudera reluctantly following after. Gokudera was biting at his thumb while he argued back and forth in his head.

'Just ask him! You know he'll say yes.'

'Tch, that may be so, but he's already--'

'Just do it.'

'No….I'm perfectly fine! I don't need him to stay with me. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of my self!'

Yamamoto stopped at the door and pulled something out of his pocket, handing it to Gokudera.

"This is your cell phone." He told him, as he set the red phone in Gokudera's hand. "All of our numbers are in there. If you need anything, anything at all, please call." Yamamoto's voice was stern and calm as he looked at Gokudera.

"O-ok I will." Gokudera told him, momentarily distracted by Yamamoto's sudden seriousness.

"Promise me, no matter how small."

Gokudera blinked " I- I promise."

Yamamoto sighed in relief, as if he had expected getting Gokudera's response to be more difficult than it actually turned out to be.

"I'll come by tomorrow." Yamamoto murmured opening the door. Gokudera didn't even realize what he did until Yamamoto was turned, facing him again with a surprised look upon his face.

"Hayato?" He asked curiously, his eyebrows furrowed slightly.

"Ah-I..." Gokudera's, his face a dark shade red, looked from his hand that was currently clasped onto the back of Yamamoto's shirt preventing him from leaving, then back to to Yamamoto's face. "I-i..don't know w-what....I-m s-sorry." He spoke, quickly withdrawing his hand. A pained expression flashed across Yamamoto's face as his heart ached once again.

"Hayato?" Yamamoto asked again softly.

'What the hell are you doing!?' Gokudera screamed at his self 'Now you look like a weird dumbass! Damn arm moving on your own!' He had to admit it, well not out loud he didn't, but in that moment as he watched Yamamoto leaving, he panicked. Every ounce of him wanted Yamamoto to stay. No that would be too selfish of him. After all Yamamoto had already given up two weeks of his life already to tale care of him, he couldn't ask him for more. He was too stubborn to admit that he didnt want to be alone, that he was afraid.

"I'm sorry......IwillcallyouifIneedanything" He answered in one breath. Gokudera shifted his gaze down at his shoes, hiding his beat red.

Surprised, Gokudera's breath hitched in his throat, as he felt Yamamoto's hand on his head. He patted it gently, then dove deeper, entwining his fingers into his hair. The feeling of the way his fingers gently moved and caressed his hair made Gokudera's eyes droop and a feeling he couldnt describe take him over.

"Ok.....have a goodnight Hayato." Yamamoto spoke in a soft almost sad tone, as he withdrew his hand from Gokudera's hair.

"Y-you too." He watched Yamamoto walk away until he was out of sight before closing and locking his door.

'W-what the hell was that..' Gokudera leaned heavily against the door using it to guide him as he slid down to the ground. His face felt hot and he was panting a little. He brought his hand in his hair, touching every spot Yamamoto's hand had touched him. 'It doesn't feel the same. Not at all.'

Yamamoto slowed his pace until he distinctly heard Gokudera's door latch closed. He sighed heavily running his hand through his own hair, as he seriously considered if he should camp out side Gokudera's house. He looked at his hand, he could still faintly feel the heat from Gokudera's head lingering on it. 'I shouldn't have done that' Yamamoto sighed again. With one last glance back at Gokudera's apartment, he began his way back to his house, walking as slow as he possibly could.

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This one is a little shorter than the others. It was originally alot longer, but I couldnt find a good place to end the chapter so it ended up ending there.

Review review please^^ Hope you enjoyed.

Thanks for reading!!


	5. Chapter Four: Dynamite and Cigarettes

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah, don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Hey guys! I love all your reviews! Thanks so much! I'm not to sure when I'm going to be update next since I'm getting married next month and my next few weeks are super busy, but Ill do my best. So just bare with me, cause my updates are going to be really slow until May is over, but after that Ill be updating a lot quicker! Thanks! Hope you enjoy!!^_^ Sorry in advance for any errors I kinda spell checked this chapter quick xD

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Walking After You 

Chapter Four: Dynamite and Cigarettes

'Quiet...'

He gnawed at his thumb relentlessly, while his leg bounced up and down on its heel.

'Its to quiet...' He could feel the pressure of the silence around him pressing against him.

No sounds of machines, no sounds of people passing by his room, no more sounds of that one person who had remained unquestionably by his his side. Not being able to take the silence anymore he grabbed the T.V remote and turned it on, turning the volume up until it hurt his ears. It didn't help though. He stood up quickly, pacing back and forth before quickly entering his kitchen, and began opening and closing all the cupboards and drawers in a quick erratic motion.

He was set on familiarizing his self with every inch of his apartment.

'What the hell....' Muscles tensing he felt a familiar panic slowly flood through his body, as he now entered the bathroom doing the same to it. He staggered, leaning into the wall for support, his chest was beginning to tighten painfully. Ignoring the pain, he shuffled into his bedroom, pulling things from the drawers and closet throwing them onto the floor.

"So irritating!'

Everything was in the exact opposite spot he had expected them to be. You would think seeing as this was his home he'd have a general idea or feeling of where his things would be, but he didn't. It pissed him off, it irritated him, it scared him.

'It fucking hurts...'

He bit at his thumb more, ignoring the throbbing pain of him breaking the skin, now tasting the thick iron taste of his own blood. Now he was in his closet, his vision blurring thanks to the tears that were filling his eyes, pulling clothes off hangers and shuffling through boxes. He laughed loudly, pain searing through his chest, when a large amount of dynamite fell to his feet. 'Fucking A, I guess they weren't lying….'

He gasped out painfully, biting his lip hard now, drawing blood, feeling the lukewarm liquid slowly run down his chin. He was panicking now.

Every breath, every movement, every thought, felt like it was suffocating, drowning him in his own mind. He couldn't stand it, the feeling of having no control, of not being able to answer such simple questions. Images flashed before him, blood on his hands, dead men, the hospital, Yamamoto, the sun, his sister, people from the party, faces he couldn't remember, Yamamoto smiling, Yamamoto laughing. He closed his eyes as his head spun, he finally realized it. That every thing they had told him about his self was true. He could see it now, and he believed every word, and it scared him, terrified him. He couldnt remember any of how he was before. What if they no longer wanted him because he couldnt remember? If he couldnt be like how he was before?

Stumbling out of his closet he fell against his bed, his hand digging into his pocket, pulling out his cell phone, sweat dripping down his face. He flicked it open, and searched his contacts for the one person his mind was screaming, 'Yamamoto...'

Yamamoto was laying in his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling, in a sad attempt to fall asleep. It had been only an hour since he had left Gokudera's apartment, he couldn't get his body to relax. He had returned home to Tsuna and his Dad cleaning up after the party, they both watched him carefully as he entered, only mumbling to them that he was tired and was going to his room. He used the sounds of them talking and cleaning as an excuse for not being able to sleep, but now that Tsuna had gone home and his Dad was asleep his self, he had no reason to not sleep now, right? He couldn't do it though, he just couldn't get Gokudera out of his mind. 'I hope he's doing ok..'

"No!" He spat out loud to his self, snapping his phone shut before dialing Yamamoto's number. 'Get a fucking grip of your self!' He closed his eyes tightly, tears streaming down his face, he let his head fall back onto his mattress, as he continued to gasp for air. Biting his lip painfully hard, and gripping the loose fabric of his jeans tightly, he attempted to return his breathing to normal.

'I can do this myself. I'm fine. I don't need him. I'm fine. Its fine, I'm fine.' He chanted in his head as the minutes trickled by slowly, unaware of the familiar fedora wearing shadow that rested outside his window watching him, until his breathing slowly returned to normal, leaving his chest throbbing dully. And he stayed that way, all his former energy gone, he allowed his eyes to close and drifted to sleep.

Gokudera woke only one hour later, quickly jumping to his feet, ignoring the pain that shot through his chest and side, and rushed to the bathroom. Ten minutes later he was panting and huffing resting his head on the toilet seat, praying that he couldn't possibly throw up anymore than he already did. 'I didn't even think I ate that much..'

Once he was sure he wasn't going to heave again, he pulled his self up, his shaky legs attempted to buckle under his weight, but he manage. Passing the mirror he looked at his reflection. His face was pale, far paler than it usually was, and was covered in a thin layer of clammy sweat, that caused strands of his hair to cling to his face. The dried blood had rolled down his chin and some on his neck stood out brightly against his face, along with the bight red gash and bluish bruise that was now upon his lip. His green eyes stared dully back at him, they looked exactly how he felt. Hollow.

He collapsed into a chair at his kitchen table, grabbing the bag that held his medications. Cursing his shaky hands he finally manage to open and take each one of his four pills, deciding to take an extra one of the pain meds to help sooth his aching body. He groaned in discomfort, his body was so sore, as he got his self a glass of water in hopes of chasing away the sickening taste of bile that lingered in his mouth. That was twice now he had freaked out like that. He gritted his teeth, he hated it. It was embarrassing, frustrating, and annoying. The fact that such small things could cause him to react in such a way was sickening to his stomach. He silently vowed to his self to never let it happen again, to ignore the discomfort or find another way to deal with it, if he found his self bothered by something again. He refused to look that weak ever again, seeing as he already has done so once already, and had no desire to again.

Looking around his kitchen and living room, items litter the floor, the T.V excruciatingly loud, only one feeling came over him, he felt ashamed. Ashamed, as he recalled the ridiculous temper tantrum he had just thrown. He looked at the clock, 1:17 am. There was no way he could sleep now, and Yamamoto said he would be coming by, he couldn't let him see his place like this. It would cause Yamamoto to worry. He didn't want Yamamoto to worry, he didnt want anyone to worry. They had done enough. He just wanted to be able to do things his self, he could right? He didn't want to be a burden. He just wanted everything to go back to normal, before he lost his memory, whatever it was he had before, he wanted it back. He could couldn't he? Afterall he was fine. Sighing he slowly began picking his things up off the floor, and returning them to their places.

Three hours later Gokudera was now sinking deeper into the hot water of his tub, his cast hanging limply out of the waters reach, letting the heat take him and calm his body.

In those three hours, Gokudera had picked up his little mess, moving things to different places if he didn't like where they were to begin with, and explored his apartment. He did so at a slow place, reminding his self of the vow he just made of not having another panic attack. It much more calming the second time around, and he even found his self chuckling at the odd places he found random sticks of dynamite. Some were taped under the table, in the cupboards in the kitchen and bathroom, under his pillow, on top of the fridge. He realized he would probably never be able to find all their hiding places, but took a mental note of where each one he found was. With packs and packs of cigarettes littering his house, he decided to light and try one. If he loved them so much before, why wouldn't he love them now.

He sighed loudly, closing his eyes in comfort as he inhaled the delicious taste, that had him craving for more. It was the only thing besides listening to Yamamoto's breathing, that felt the most familiar to him. 'I guess old habits are hard to kill', he thought inhaling the soothing taste again. He loved them. He needed them.

After tending to his now busted lip and chewed thumb, he dressed his self in just boxers and crawled into his bed. It was nice, the soft feeling of the comforter against his aching skin. He sighed glancing at his cast and all the names, messages, and drawings that cluttered it. He smiled to his self. Laying there he glanced around his dark room his eyes falling upon the only two pictures he had noticed throughout his whole house, sitting upon his dresser. Sitting up to get a closer look, he saw one was of him and Tsuna, both of them sporting school uniforms and big goofy smiles. The second picture, it was one of him and Yamamoto, who wore a baseball uniform, one arm stretched out directed towards the camera forming a peace sign, his other arm was wrapped over Gokudera's shoulder pulling Gokudera into him with a disgruntled look upon his blushing face, while Yamamoto wore a grin that covered his whole face. A grin that Gokudera had only witnessed once so far. Gokudera found his self standing in front of this picture, holding it in his hands, he returned to his bed and set it upon his night stand.

Taking notice to the blushing face of his picture self he found he wondered what kind of relationship him and Yamamoto shared.

Yamamoto knocked quietly upon Gokudera's door, his face expressing his clear anxiety as he waited. Nothing. He knocked again only this time louder than before. Thinking he should call Gokudera instead, he was just pulling out his cell phone when the door was wrenched quickly open followed by a sleepy growl, "The hell you want this early?"

Yamamoto stared, his mouth hanging open, before it was over taken by furious blush, at the site before him.

Gokudera, who he guessed had been asleep, his hair messy and sticking up awkwardly, his bright green eyes were still droopy with sleep, with bags that formed darkly under them on his pale skin. And there he stood in nothing but a pair of dark blue boxers.

Yamamoto let his eyes travel down to Gokudera's lean chest and torso, that glistened lightly with sweat, his face deepening its blush as he eyes traveled over his small pink nipples, and continued on. A frown forming upon his face as his eyes traveled over the dark bruises that stood out so brightly on such ivory skin, then to the bandaged wound upon his side. His blush only returning in full force as his eyes rested on Gokudera's boxers.

"Huh, oh Yamamoto…Its only you.." Gokudera realized, rubbing his sleepy eyes, before looking at the dark red face of Yamamoto. "Yamamoto..? Hey are you breathing?" Gokudera asked concerned and maybe a little bit amused, stepping closer to Yamamoto, their noses almost touching.

Yamamoto's breath hitched as the sudden closeness of Gokudera snapped him out of his pervy thoughts, for in fact he wasn't breathing and found his self almost passing out at the mere fact that he could feel Gokudera's body heat radiating off him.

Gokudera, who was now waving his hand in front of Yamamoto's droopy eyes, huffed in irritation.

"Hey! What the hell is your problem!?" He snapped "You come over to wake me up only to space out and piss me off…Huh hey your nose is bleeding."

"Haha..sorry H-Hayato..What oh oops.." Yamamoto finally found his voice, as he desperately fought the urge to look Gokudera's body over again. He clutched at his nose which was indeed very much bleeding.

And with that, a sudden breeze fluttered past them, causing Gokudera to realize just why Yamamoto had spaced out, with a quick glance at his appearance and one to Yamamoto, Gokudera's face filled with embarrassment, and he hurried inside and into his room fumbling for pants.

Yamamoto let his self in setting the two to-go boxes, and bags of food upon the table, before grabbing some paper towels to stop his gushing nose.

'Shit shit shit…idiot idiot idiot…' Gokudera chanted furiously in his head as he pulled the nearest shirt he could find over his head. His face seemed to be stuck in a constant state of red as he continuously brought the image of Yamamoto's face in his mind. His blushing face, the droopy lust filled eyes, those lust filled eyes….

'He looked so cute. No he looked hot…..' He froze in mid stride 'What did I-' Ruffling his hair roughly he entered the kitchen where Yamamoto stood, a sheepish smile on his face, his hand on the blood soaked paper towel that he held to his face.

"I brought food." He stated muffled by the paper towel, once he saw Gokudera.

'Mn." Was all Gokudera could retort, if he spoke now he was sure his voice would squeak with embarrassment. He had to admit to his self, no matter how embarrassed he was right now, he was very happy that Yamamoto was finally here. He had tossed and turned uncomfortably all night, not being able to fall asleep normally. He came to a conclusion why, he was missing the husky breathing of the man in front of him. Once he realized this fact he decided he would suck it up and ask Yamamoto if he would stay with him, at least for one night.

So they both sat down, Yamamoto retrieving utensils for them, and they ate.

Now that Yamamoto was no longer distracted by Gokudera's sculpted exposed body, he took this opportunity to truly look at Gokudera, and once again his heart ached. He looked tired, and not just because Yamamoto had woken him, he looked truly tired, exhausted. The bags that formed under Gokudera's eyes were much darker than he saw them yesterday, and his lip held a large cut with matching bruise, and his eyes, his eyes looked so disturbingly dull. Yamamoto gagged on his food slightly as he struggled to get it down, he couldn't stand to see Gokudera like this.

Yamamoto didn't get any sleep last night, of coarse. He tossed and turned until he couldn't take it anymore. Deciding to watch T.V instead, nodding of every now and then, but for no longer than a half an hour at the most. Once he heard the sounds of his dad beginning his day, he finally pulled his self out of his room and downstairs. Yamamoto was thankful that his dad remained silent only greeting him good morning, and Yamamoto doing the same. He was sure his dad could see his obvious stressed state, and was even more thankful to him that he didn't question him about it. Yamamoto had been on his way out to Gokudera's when his dad stopped him, thrusting two boxes of food into his hands with a large smile.

"For you and Hayato." He told Yamamoto

"Old-man…"

"Now now hurry up and take it to him before it gets cold." His father interrupted, pushing Yamamoto towards the door.

Yamamoto smiled. "Thanks."

On his way he stopped at a local store he always went to, and picked up some of Gokudera's favorite foods, hoping that just maybe Gokudera would remember them.

"What happened to your lip?" Yamamoto asked quietly, breaking the silence of their meal.

Gokudera stiffened, his hand freezing briefly, before continuing its path into his mouth.

"I bit it." He didn't lie, "On accident." He added seeing the confused concerned look Yamamoto gave him.

"O-oh…"Yamamoto wasn't sure how you could bit you lip on accident but didn't push it any further. "I-I brought you some groceries so.." He motioned to the fridge.

Gokudera looked up at him in surprise. "Oh thanks, you didn't have to do that, I could of.." Gokudera trailed off.

"Its no problem Hayato." Yamamoto said happily, shoving a particularly large bit into his mouth. "It was on the way anyways."

Gokudera smiled at him. "This is good."

"Ah, my dad made it." Yamamoto said brightly once he had swallowed.

"Mn."

"Oh so are you smoking again?" Yamamoto asked taking notice to the pack of cigarettes that Gokudera had carried from his bedroom.

Gokudera smiled at him, "Is that a problem?"

Yamamoto smiled back, "Nope, not at all Hayato."

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Oh my 'Dera is just so stubborn isnt he xD

Yada Yada as always review and tell me what ya think! Hope you enjoyed!!

Once again, updates will be slow for the next few weeks, sorry!! *ducks*

See you next chapter!! Thanks!!


	6. Chapter Five: Baseball Freak

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don t read.

**Disclaimer**: Gah don t I wish *pouts*

**Pairing:** YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N:** thank you thank you to all you reviewers I love you all sooooo much! You have no idea!! Phew! Ok so my computer is being a major pain in my ass so this had been uploaded from my blackberry so its in a little bit different format, but I just couldn't wait this chp, has been waiting on my computer for a week now!! So I hope it turns out right. Ill be editing it to the same format as the rest of the chapters once my computer decides to cooperate. I'm so sorry for any errors! Sorry no lemon yet but don t worry its on its way I promise^_^

**Edited: **Yay my computer works!! It should be much easier to read now!! :D Thank you to all you who read it before hand!!

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Walking After You

Chapter Five: Baseball-Freak

Yamamoto was putting their dishes away, when he felt his cell phone buzzing in his pocket. With a quick glance at Gokudera, who was quietly watching TV on the couch, he pulled it out and flipped it open and answered. "Hello?"

Gokudera shifted his weight nervously on the couch as he listened to the clanking and clicking of Yamamoto in the kitchen. He had already decided that he was going to ask Yamamoto to stay the night, but the question now was when? In his head it was an easy decision to make, but now with Yamamoto in front of him it was a completely different situation. 'Why the hell am I so nervous? Its just a little favor, right?' He looked towards the kitchen when he heard Yamamoto's voice thinking he was speaking to him, until he saw the cell phone Yamamoto held to his ear. His curiosity getting the better of him Gokudera scooted the end of the couch leaning over the arm of it, trying to get his ear as close to the kitchen he could possible get, but Yamamoto was talking to quietly and could only catch pieces of Yamamoto s conversation. 'Tch, can the person he's talking to even hear him?'

"Ahaha no..I can't.....Yeah busy other plans sorry I know.....Hayato......more important....yes....whatever......Im sorry...bye". The loud snap of Yamamoto s cell phone being closed had Gokudera sitting up and scooting back to the other side of the couch before Yamamoto came around the corner, his face holding a hint of annoyance, and plopping down next to him. with a sigh. Gokudera glanced at him and cleared his throat nervously.

"S-so W-who was that? He asked glancing at Yamamoto again, who just simply looked back at him, "N-not that its any of my business of coarse". He quickly added turning his attention to the T.V, fearing that he was prying some where that he shouldn't be.

Yamamoto chuckled lightly. "Its fine. Just some guy from the team".

Gokudera raised his eyebrow.

"Baseball team," Yamamoto clarified with another chuckled "For practice".

"And? What's the problem?" Gokudera asked."Aren't you some kind of baseball freak anyways?"

Yamamoto couldn't help but smile at the semi-rude nick-name he had come to love, before his eyes dropped slightly, "I don t feel like it".

Gokudera raised his eyebrow higher at him before narrowing his eyes to a glare reading exactly what was going through Yamamoto's mind.

" Tch I don t need a babysitter if that s what s stopping you," Gokudera huffed crossing his arms, continuing to keep his eyes on the television.

Yamamoto stiffened, biting his lip."H-Hayato I didn t mean it like that, I just..." He trailed off, looking out the window.

Gokudera watched Yamamoto from the corner of his eye, a wave of guilt rushed over him. It was obvious that Yamamoto wanted to go, and he was holding Yamamoto back. Yamamoto was worrying about him. Gokudera had listened to story after story of baseball this and baseball that, and every time Yamamoto told them his eyes would light up. Gokudera found it humorous and interesting to watch Yamamoto speak about baseball, he held so much passion for it, that Gokudera was a little envious.

Coming to a decision Gokudera huffed and stood up heading for the door.

"Hayato?"

"Well are you coming or what?" Gokudera almost snapped,"Or do I have to watch a bunch of idiots I don t know play baseball?"

What ever air Gokudera had been smoothly breathing he choked on as a wide grin Yamamoto got up from the couch and faced him, his eyes still filled with concern.

"Hayato..I-"

"Tch will you just hurry up". He snapped this time his face a cute shade of pink as he grabbed his keys and wallet.'I bet I've never blushed so much before in my entire life maybe..'

"Ok ok, but I have to stop at my place first then". Yamamoto told Gokudera as they exited his apartment.

"Whatever. Cause I have no clue where the baseball field is anyways." Gokudera admitted as he locked his door. Yamamoto chuckled.

"But aren t you going to get bored?" Yamamoto yelled up to Gokudera who was currently seated in the exact center of the forth row of bleachers.

"Tch, Im fine. You worry to much, just go play already!" Gokudera yelled back, flicking his cigarette.

Gokudera could barely hear Yamamoto chuckle. "Ok ok Hayato. Just stay here. Don t go anywhere okay". He called up, his voice filled with such seriousness that it made Gokudera roll his eyes slightly.

"Where the hell would I go? Id just get lost anyways!" Gokudera said his voice oozing with sarcasm. "Now go, look they all are waiting for you." Gokudera pointed to the field, where in fact all Yamamoto's teammates stood, every single one of them looking in their direction.

A small frown appeared upon Yamamoto's face. "Ok ok I'm going." With one last glance at Gokudera he took to the field his bat in hand.

Gokudera snickered, barely hearing Yamamoto mumbling apologies to his teammates. And so Gokudera sat and watched, and watched, and watched. The large group of boys split themselves up into two teams and played against each other like it was a real game.

Gokudera wasn't one for sports at least as far as he knew and would never admit it out loud, but he was very entertained and even found his self grinning and quietly exclaiming a 'yes' when a good play or hit was made, and was hissing in disappointment when the side wasn't rooting for, the side that didn't contain Yamamoto, scored. Though Yamamoto alone was enough to entertain Gokudera, and he had Gokudera quite impressed. Yamamoto was great. Not to mention the blush that never left Gokudera's face as he watched a bright eyed wide grinning baseball freak play enthusiastically. Yamamoto seemed completely engrossed by the game, none of his movements were wasted, and he moved in a smooth fluid motion, his eyes lit with determination. Gokudera felt a little envious again. He wondered if he had that much passion for something.

'He truly is a baseball freak'.

Every now and then Yamamoto would throw a quick glance in his direction, in which Gokudera assumed was to make sure he was still there, which he was correct, before returning his full attention back to the game.

Before Gokudera knew it, it was sunset. 'Had he really watched Yamamoto play all day long?' Judging by the loud growl his stomach groaned and the large heap of used cigarettes at his feet, the answer was clear. Yamamoto too seemed to barely realized this, as he stood in front of the bleachers, back in his street clothes, smiling and apologizing saying something about him letting the time get away from him.

"Whatever. I m hungry. Feed me. Gokudera groaned walking down the bleachers to meet Yamamoto. Yamamoto laughed pleasantly, sending shivers down Gokudera's spine.

So they returned back at Gokudera's apartment where Gokudera, who was quite tired, made his self comfortable as Yamamoto, who had insisted, started making dinner. Gokudera sat at the table his head propped up by his arm his eyes drooping slightly, as he listened to Yamamoto gush about certain plays and ideas he had for baseball, while balancing pots and pans cooking dinner. Even though it was utterly boring to him, Gokudera contented with it, seeing how Yamamoto's face lit up when he spoke about baseball was worth it.

Yamamoto was in quite the mood and smiled at Gokudera brightly as he put his plate of food in front of him. Today had been great, he had finally been able to play baseball for the first time in weeks, though he did feel guilty for momentarily forgetting that Gokudera was waiting for him. He didn't realize how badly he had missed until he threw his first pitch, the sound of the wind, the woosh of the bat, the loud thud of the ball being caught, a perfect strike. He loved baseball, but it would never compare to Gokudera, never. Yes he had missed playing it, but he could live without it, but without Gokudera he could not. Baseball, it was his escape, even if it was just for the moment, it was an escape from the bitter reality that he had now inhabited.

"Oi! Are you listening!?" Gokudera's annoyed voice snapped him back to reality.

"Ahaha sorry I kinda spaced". Yamamoto admitted, scratching the back of his head a sheepish grin crossing his face.

Gokudera's eye twitched before he stood up and discarded his plate into the sink grumpily mumbling, "Idiot..and here I was complimenting your cooking..Tch.."

"Ah I ll do that Hayato." Yamamoto stated standing directly behind Gokudera, who stiffened shivers running down his spine, as soon as he felt Yamamoto hot breath caress the back of his neck, dropping the plate he held in his hand, which shattered in the sink.

"O-ops s-shit.."

"See." Yamamoto stated his voice highly amused, as he gently pushed the flushed faced Gokudera out of the way of the sink and replacing it with his self.

"You cant do it with your cast..."Yamamoto paused his grin widening into a smirk "Well or at all for a matter of fact." Gokudera raised an eyebrow at him, forgetting his pink tinted face for the moment. Yamamoto chuckled, "Lets just say you'd have absolutely no dishes if I left it up to you to wash them."

"Huh? But I have dishes now don't I?"Gokudera pointed out, interested in this new reveal of his self, "So who washes them then? Or do I not eat at home at all?"Gokudera questioned.

Yamamoto tensed for the briefest second before chuckling and returning to cleaning the dishes telling him,"No, you eat here all the time". Gokudera waited for the rest, but seeing as Yamamoto had no intention of continuing he just shrugged and planted his self back in a chair and watched Yamamoto as he shuffled around his kitchen, cleaning up. '

All done..' Yamamoto sighed surveying the clean kitchen. He turned back to the table where Gokudera sat, his head resting upon his hands, his eyes closed. 'No wonder he was so quiet.'

"Hayato?" Yamamoto spoke quietly, inches from Gokudera's face. Nothing. Yamamoto sighed, smiling to his self before taking Gokudera's left arm and pulling it up and over his shoulders, hoisting Gokudera up, and carried him into the room.

A small sigh escaped Gokudera's lips as he was laid on his bed gently. Yamamoto discarded Gokudera's heavy red sweater, reveling him to now be in quite tight white tank top, which had Yamamoto blushing and staring continuously, he removed it as well. He scolded his fingers for grazing along Gokudera's chest longer than they should have been. 'Thank god he's not awake. Breath..' He told his self as he surveyed Gokudera's chest, scowling again at the bandaged wound on his side, and the now light green and yellow bruises that were scattered across his torso.

"nghh..y-you know Y-yam...a..to..?"Gokudera mumbled, cuasing Yamamoto to flinch and blush deeply. Though Gokudera's eyes were still tightly closed as he continued to speak.

"Yes, Hayato?" Yamamoto gulped hard, he was now undoing Gokudera's large belt, the discarding on to the floor and then began unbuttoning his jeans and slowly sliding them off Gokudera's thin pale figure. Yamamoto quickly thought perhaps he was crossing the line here, but Gokudera was so out of it 'It must be the medication', and he knew Gokudera always hated sleeping in his jeans, 'They itch and pinch your skin,' he always complained to Yamamoto.

"y-you s-ee-em to kn-know your w--way round m-my apartment p-preeeet--y w-well..." Gokudera could barely be understood as he was briefly lifted up and then returned to the soft mattress, and being covered by his warm comforter.

Yamamoto's eyes dropped slightly as he stood over the peaceful sleeping figure. "Ah, I do".

"M..n."

"Good night Hayato.." Yamamoto whispered, reluctantly turning and leaving, but he found his self abruptly being tugged backwards. Surprised, he turned, his heart skipping a beat and then shattered all at once at the sight before him. Gokudera was sprawled across the bed, on his stomach now, his arm outstretched before him firmly grasping the back of Yamamoto's shirt. He was looking up at Yamamoto, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes filled with desperation, fear, loneliness, Yamamoto couldn't count the emotions they held.

"D-don t g-go. P-please stay". Gokudera pleaded his voice laced with pain that too flashed across his face. "I-I d-don t want to b-be alone." Gokudera admitted dropping his face into the mattress, hating his self for how utterly selfish he was being. "I-im afraid..t-to be a-alone.." The last sentence was extremely muffled as Gokudera spoke it into the mattress.

Yamamoto couldn't move, couldn't breath, but found his self doing so anyways sitting upon the bed, his hand gently brushing through Gokudera's hair comfortingly. "Of coarse Hayato."

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Phew! Gah that was a pain to edit on my blackberry!! Sry again for any mistakes!!

Please review! Hope you all liked!!

See ya next chapter (*-*)


	7. Chapter Six: Routine

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah, don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Yay yay! My computer works again! Phew! Thank you to all of you who read chapter five in such a difficult format! I love you^^ Thank you thank you to all your reviews as well! I love ach and everyone of them and look forward to them each chapter! If any of you have any suggestions, tips, or ideas feel free throw them in as well or PM me. Thank you to all your wedding wishes as well! Oh my its right around the corner and I seem to be channeling all my stress into my keyboard *poor thing* But good for you! Ive got at least three chapters almost ready to go. Just some small edits to make and ill be updating them^^ OOOKKK moving on, this chappie is filled with tons of angst! Hope you enjoy^^

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Walking After You

Chapter Six: Routine

"_Ha…to..?_

"_Mn?"_

"_I-I… l..ve….you.."_

"_Ti amo base-"_

"_I…lo..e….y-y..u."_

'What was that? A dream..? Who's voice was that? It sounded weird, distorted. And was I speaking Italian?' He thought about it, realizing that he in fact did know Italian, words and phrases floated through his head as he thought about it. 'Heh...I guess it makes sense, I used to live in Italy. At least I didn't forget that. But who was I saying I love you to?'

Gokudera reluctantly woke, not desiring to leave the warmth that encased him, or the husky breathing that he felt against the back of his neck.

Breathing…husky breathing…against his neck……

Confused he furrowed his eyebrows as he opened his eyes, tilting his head up to look behind him, only to be graced with the tanned peaceful sleeping face of Yamamoto, who was currently had Gokudera pulled snug against him. Gokudera blushed, quickly returning to his originally position and burying his face into his pillow.

'That's right..'

He had asked Yamamoto to stay, but he certainly didn't remember asking him to sleep in the same bed as him, let alone snuggle him. His blush deepened as Yamamoto grunted lightly and snuggled further into his back burying his face in Gokudera's hair, inhaling deeply, causing Gokudera's stomach to flutter and his eyes close.

'Wait!' He snapped his eyes open again, glaring at the clock in front of him, 6:43pm…..6:43.….pm?

"Holy shit…!" Gokudera said loudly shooting up, wrenching his self from Yamamoto's grasp.

Hearing Gokudera yell Yamamoto jolted awake, jumping up to his feet, grabbing Shigure Kintoki, which was resting against the wall next to the bed, in a swift fluid motion, and pulled it out from its bag.

"W-what? What is it?" His still sleepy voice asked hurriedly, glancing around the room franticly, searching for an intruder of some kind.

Gokudera couldnt hold it in and burst into laughter.

Yamamoto started confused and surprised, staring, his mouth open wide open at Gokudera who was doubling over, holding his stomach and side as he laughed, rolling out of bed and onto the floor.

"H-Hayato…A-Are you..?" Yamamoto lowered Shigure Kintoki, which returned to its normal form. 'What the..?'

Gokudera tried to stifle his laughter to speak but had no such luck and continued to rolling side to side against the wall, his side aching with each laugh.

Yamamoto grinned, chuckling slowly at Gokudera. "What just happened?"

"Ah y-your f-face..idiot…oh my god, y-you should have seen y-your f-face…." Gokudera finally manage to get out between laughs and gasps of air.

"Huh?"

Gokudera exhaled deeply, regaining his senses. "S-sorry I didn't mean to startle you, but we slept the whole day away." Gokudera pointed to the clock receiving a wide 'oooooohhhh' look from Yamamoto, "It surprised me."

Yamamoto laughed his face tingling from embarrassment, "Aha I guess we both really needed it."

Silence.

Awkward. The two boxers only clad boys looked over the room purposely avoiding each other's eyes.

"Why are you in only boxers?" Gokudera asked a small blush forming on his face as he tried not to stare at the tanned well toned abs of Yamamoto.

"You wanted me to stay and I don't have any pajamas here, besides I like sleeping in my boxers anyways." Yamamoto said stretching his arms as he yawned.

"Y-you were holding me too…' Gokudera turned away trying to hid his now very pink face.

"Aha yeah sorry, but you wouldn't let go of my shirt, and that was the only comfortable position I could get in. Sorry." He added again, his voice was low and quiet.

Gokudera peeked at his face with one eye, Yamamoto's head was down, staring at the ground, his eyebrows furrowed, his eyes narrowed, with a painful expression across his face. Yamamoto was silently scolding his self, he knew he crossed the lines shouldn't have done that, but he couldn't stop his self.

'Holding on to what shirt? Your not wearing one you idiot!'

"Tch what's with that face for?" Gokudera huffed standing up now, "I merely stated a fact, I never said I didn't…mind it…" Gokudera said the last part in an almost non-audible whisper, which Yamamoto did hear, quite clearly actually.

"Haya-"

"Ok, I'm gong to take a bath then." Gokudera interrupted him, crossing the room to his closet, retrieving some clothes.

"Ill make us some food." Yamamoto's voice drifted into the closet.

"Oi wait!" Gokudera called to him down the hall, where Yamamoto was now walking, he turned curiously to Gokudera. "I've been meaning to ask you….What's up with all these damn pockets everywhere?" Gokudera asked, his voice a little annoyed, as he held up his clothes, a pair pf pants and a shirt, pointing to the odd pockets that were sewn inside of them. All of his clothes seemed to be like that, little odd pockets covered the insides of all his clothes, and he couldn't figure out why.

Yamamoto raise his eyebrows, his face quite amused as his lips turned into a smirk. "For all your dynamite of coarse."

"Oh…" It dawned on him the moment Yamamoto said it. He heard Yamamoto chuckle at Gokudera's sudden fascination with his clothes before he continued his way to the kitchen.

They both ate and bathed, then watched some T.V before once again finding themselves falling asleep and they slept, with Gokudera cuddling into Yamamoto's chest, dreaming the same dream once again.

It was the routine that they seemed to fall into weather they had intended to in the beginning or not.

There was no complaining, no questions, it just simply was, with neither one of them having any desire to break it.

Yamamoto stayed, every night, sleeping in the same bed as Gokudera. Yamamoto cooked meals for them both, while Gokudera immersed his self in the odd collection of books he had in his bookcases: 'Creatures of the Deep', 'Mysterious Beast Sightings', 'Aliens Among Us', all of which always received chuckles from Yamamoto as Gokudera excitedly pointed out certain articles and pictures to Yamamoto, his glasses slipping down his nose.

Gokudera wasn't all to sure how he felt about it all, and truthfully didnt want to think about it. All he knew was he didn't want to be alone, and he didnt want Yamamoto to leave. But that didn't stop him form feeling guilty, he knew he was clinging to Yamamoto, he was being selfish. He had only regretfully admitted it once to Yamamoto, the night he asked him to stay, that he was afraid to be alone. Yamamoto never mentioned anything about his confession, and just simply stayed by his side, which Gokudera was grateful for. He didnt want to come to the conclusion in his head that the only reason he allowed Yamamoto to stay, was because he was afraid of the suffocating silence that wouold surround him the moment Yamamoto left. He wanted there to be another reason for why he allowed Yamamoto to stay. Why he let Yamamoto sleep in the same bed as him, why he allowed him to hold him everynight.

For Yamamoto, staying with Gokudera was like a double edge sword. Of coarse he didn't mind it, he didn't mind it at all, in fact he needed it, to be near Gokudera. But all the same being around Gokudera hurt. It hurt a lot, that Gokudera still couldn't remember anything, that he was unaware of Yamamoto's deep feelings for him, and the relationship they once held. Every day he battled with his self, as to tell Gokudera, or not to. He wanted to tell him more than anything, but was afraid of the thought of Gokudera rejecting him. After all it had taken him quite awhile to confess his feelings to Gokudera in the first place, it would be even harder this time a round. He also thought it would also be selfish of him to satisfy his needs before Gokudera's own, especially when Gokudera's needs were far more important than his own.

Yamamoto was only able to find relief when they slept in the same bed together. Waiting for Gokudera to fall asleep he would wrap his arms around Gokudera and pull him close to him. And he would hold him, not wanting to sleep but rather just savor the warmth of Gokudera's body in his arms, the light scent of Gokudera's skin and hair as he buried his head into Gokudera's neck. The feeling bringing tears to his eyes. Only once had he allowed tears to fall, and that was the first night. Gokudera never woke during any of this, though a few times he briefly felt his body being pulled into Yamamoto's own, but was to tired to fully wake.

After the first morning Gokudera had woken in Yamamoto's arms, he was extremely embarrassed and confused, not because they both were only clothed in just boxers, but because Gokudera found he actually didnt mind the feeling. That he actually liked it. Yamamoto's husky breathing in his ears, his hot breath hitting the back of his neck, the sigh Yamamoto would make when he cuddled into Gokudera further, how he tightened his grip around Gokudera's waist, sending Gokudera's stomach flipping and fluttering.

Of coarse that evening had been an awkward one. Both of them trying to find the right words to say, but instead remained silent. That all ended when they both fell asleep while watching T.V, and Gokudera unconsciously cuddled into Yamamoto's chest and didn't move until they woke the next morning. Gokudera now, couldn't sleep without it, and secretly loved waking in Yamamoto's gentle embrace each morning.

But all good things come to an end.

Since school was on two week holiday, they had plenty of free time. During this time they would visit Yamamoto's dad, who apparently had no problem with Yamamoto staying with Gokudera, and he would make them sushi. Gokudera would wait and watch Yamamoto's baseball team practice, receiving brief visits from Hibari who would stare him down dangerously growling at him that 'Smoking wasn't allowed on campus' before leaving with a little yellow bird fluttering behind him. It was only during the first visit that he quickly snubbed it out. After that he just smiled nervously as Hibari stalked away, his cigarette still firmly held between his lips. Every now and then Ryohei would also run by during his training, or so Gokudera assumed, waving ecstatically and yelling at him. As always the only word Gokudera could make out was 'EXTREME'. Gokudera would just smile and wave back.

They also frequently visited Tsuna, in which Yamamoto, Reborn, and Tsuna, with the occasional Hibari, who would leave immediatly growling something about 'crowding'. They would speak in hushed tones, why Gokudera was mauled by his step-sister, still claded in goggles, and irritated by Lambo. They were hiding something from him, he knew it.

Shortly afterwards Yamamoto accompanied Gokudera back to the hospital to get both his stitches and cast removed, both he was very grateful for, he was sick and tired of lugging his heavy arm around. Not to mention he felt disgusting, and desperately wanted to wash his arm. He wasn't to thrilled to be returning to the hospital, but had no choice, he was grateful at least that he wasn't returning either injured or alone. Once his stitches were removed both boys viewed the light jagged scar that traveled up Gokudera's torso and around to his back. It wasn't as bad as they both expected. But was just another obvious reminder of what had happened. Neither of them liked it, and didn't mention it or wished to see it again. Gokudera made a note to change his shirts quickly form now on, so he wouldnt have to see it.

After the first week every thing started to go down hill from there.

Yamamoto could no longer sleep each night, his sleep being plagued by horrific nightmares and images of Gokudera laying in the midst of rubble dead and bloody. He couldn't stop them and was waking every night gasping for air and covered in sweat.

Of coarse the sudden sound of Yamamoto hyperventilating behind him would wake Gokudera. It was only the first night that he asked Yamamoto about it. He told Gokudera he was fine, it was nothing. Of coarse Gokudera could tell he was obviously lying, his pale sweaty face, tired fearful eyes, but didn't press the subject. Every night after that Gokudera just simply laid there listening, as Yamamoto calmed his self before he got up and retreated to the living room to watch T.V.

Gokudera didn't know what to do, he couldn't even help his self, so how could he help someone else. Especially when Yamamoto didnt want to tell him why he was waking in such a terrified fashion. The only thing that came to his mind was to tell Yamamoto to go home, but his selfishness over ruled that option, so he smoked exactly four cigarettes before attempting to fall back to sleep, missing the warmth of Yamamoto pressed against his back.

Yamamoto knew Gokudera was awake, he could smell the fresh tobacco and smoke of his cigarettes as it drifted into the living room, he could hear his long exhales, and flickering sound of his lighter as he lit another. He couldn't go back in there and face him, he couldn't stop his arms from trembling. Remembering the mangled sight of Gokudera's body, his pale blood soaked face, how light and frail he felt as he took him in his arms. It was horrible sight, he felt sick.

So every night both boys were denied the sleep they so desperately wanted and needed.

Gokudera still wasn't content in his amnesic state, and forced it out of his mind into a denial state. He didnt think about his memory loss. Nor did they talk about it, which was extremely hard considering there wasn't much to say that didn't involve it. It was like talking about a murdered loved one in a room filled with mourners. An awkward silence would always linger around the two if it was accidentally mentioned. Clearly anyone could see the tension was building up, like an overflowing river hitting against a dam, a dam that was slowly giving away. It was only a matter of time before it would break, and every thing would come spilling out.

Gokudera was tired, he wanted to remember, so badly, but still his mind remained blank, the dialouge from his single repeative dream he had everynight the only thing filling it It was so frustrating, annoying, and maddening that he could barely stand it. He didn't know what to do, so he didn't do anything. He didn't acknowledge his memory loss. He didnt acknowledge the pained expression that Yamamoto wore too often. Or acknowledge the mental and physical exhausted state he was in. He went out of his way to ignore any and all signs that presented themselves to him. It was slowly drowning him, with Yamamoto's presence being the only thing keeping his head above the water. Of coarse was too stubborn to see the clear signs of him dragging Yamamoto down with him.

He was fine. They were fine.

It was a routine that Gokudera feared would end. A routine that Yamamoto couldn't live without. A routine they both had become dependent upon.

And thus the two week holiday flew by quickly and before Gokudera knew it him and Yamamoto were standing in front of their home room classroom. Yamamoto, who had been even more on edge than usual the last few days, fearing Gokudera would become overwhelmed again and have another panic attack, gave him a quick glance and smile before he opened the door.

Some students looked up from what they were doing, their eyes lingering especially on Gokudera, as they walked in, a few students called hello's out to both of them.

"This is your desk." Yamamoto told him pointing to a desk in the front row

'Great…of coarse it had to be in the front.'

"I'm over there" He pointed to a desk more towards the back of the room "And Tsuna's over there." He pointed to a row of desks by the windows. Gokudera nodded acknowledging each location.

"Oh Yamamoto! Gokudera! Good Morning," Tsuna's voice beamed from the doorway as he entered the classroom.

"Morning Tsuna." Yamamoto called back.

"Good morning Tsuna."

Tsuna frowned. Even though it had been over a month since Gokudera had lost his memories, he still hadn't become used to Gokudera calling him 'Tsuna', it just didn't sound right. He would give anything to hear 'Judaime' or even 'Boss' come form Gokudera's lips.

"Alright alright take your seats." The teacher called closing the door behind him and moving to his desk.

Yamamoto gave Gokudera an encouraging smile before retreating to his desk with Tsuna. Nervously Gokudera took his seat, and ready his self for whatever the day would throw at him.

School went by fairly quick, with no problems arising. The first hour was the worst as Gokudera tried to acustomed his self to his surroundings. He was quite thankful he was seated in the front, he couldnt see the looks he was sure he was receiving. Especially from a one Yamamoto Takeshi, whose eyes he could feel boring into his back all day, it made him quite uncomfortable, and decide to focus on his paper and assignments he was given as a distraction. Gokudera quickly became used to their classroom, and found most of their subjects, math especially, being quite easy, and flew through the problems their were given much quicker than the other students. Thankfully their teacher didnt pick on him to answer any questions but instead smiled kindly at Gokudera, his eyes full of pity. Gokudera quickly looked away and didnt look at him the rest of the day, he would have perfered being called on. During lunch he climbed up to the roof with Tsuna and Yamamoto, where they usually ate, he was told. Reborn visited them briefly, not saying much, just observing as always, and beating up Tsuna, who received a nasty kick to the back of the head during Reborn's grand entrance. Gokudera couldn't help but feel bad for Tsuna, Reborn was quite rough on him.

Gokudera had naturally been a apprehensive about going to school, who wouldnt be after just losing all your memories. He didnt want to have to answer questions about his self he obviously wouldnt know, or re-introduce his self to others who alredy knew him. But judging by the whispers and glances he received, he assumed that someone had told them all about his accident and condition. Which of coarse made him feel extremely self conscious, and had him wishing he could run down the halls, out of school, and into his apartment. Unbeknownst to him, Hibari prowled the halls hissing and threatening 'to bite every single one of them to death for displaying such rude behavior inside Namimori's walls'. Of coarse he did this after Tsuna had paid him a visit during one of their breaks, in which he vented his frustrations at his class mates lack of courtesy, tears filling in his eyes. Tears, Hibari would not have.

After that all the students seemed to scatter like ants away from Gokudera, which he was curious as to why, but all together grateful for.

Tsuna hated it, and couldn't stand it, seeing how much his two best friends had changed. Of coarse it wasn't Gokudera's fault, it was none of their faults, but it caused his chest to ache painfully as he watched them both.

Yamamoto who he had always know to have a constant grin on his face, barely showed it every now and then, and when he did, it wasn't the same. It didn't hold the same light it once had. He knew Yamamoto blamed his self for what happened. He heared him mumbling as they waited in the waiting room, as the doctors worked on Gokudera. "Its all mt fault. I should have went with him. Its my fault he was alone. It's my fault" After the first hour Tsuna had given up on consoling him and too started blaming his self. He too should have went with both Yamamoto and Gokudera. They should have never of split up.

And Gokudera, who had no memory of anything. He looked sad, exhausted, and lost. He was always so hyper and always causing problems for Tsuna. It wasn't right to see that constant pained look of confusion in his eyes. Seeing how Gokudera was on his first day back at school, hit Tsuna hard. Seeing how Gokudera's eyes scanned their classroom carefully, his eyebrows knitted together as if he was etching every inch of it in his mind. How he kept to his self quietly at his desk, when he'd usually be chatting loudly at Tsuna's desk or yelling curses at other students. The way he firmly stuck to Yamamoto's side during their breaks and lunch, following his every move, since he didnt know where to go his self. It was real. It hadnt been a dream. It actually happened, Gokudera had lost his memory.

When he found out that Yamamoto was staying with Gokudera he worried even more, fearing for Yamamoto's mental state. He briefed his worries to Yamamoto, he just smiled and said it was okay, as long as he could stay by Gokudera and help him in some way, it was okay. He was okay with being just friends.

'What a liar'. Tsuna thought.

Before the incident Gokudera and Yamamoto had been inseparable, more so after they returned from the future. They had just started living together at Gokudera's apartment, and had been together for two years now.

Tsuna felt sick to his stomach as he removed all of Yamamoto's belongings from Gokudera's apartment, which he was request to do so by Yamamoto, the day after Gokudera had awaken. He couldn't say no to him, Yamamoto gave him the excuse of 'It will help Hayato cope easier I think,' and the fact that Yamamoto had no intention of telling Gokudera about their relationship.

After all that, after all they had been through there was no way living with Gokudera like that would be easy for Yamamoto.

He had talked with Reborn and Hibari about his worries of his two friends. Reborn suggested that he look at it through Yamamoto's perspective, he loved Gokudera, more than anything, couldn't live without him. 'He needs to be near Gokudera, its his way of dealing with the accident', or so Reborn reasoned.

Hibari only huffed and told him 'They will figure it out sooner or later', which Tsuna took it as, they will figure it all out for themselves the hard way. He couldn't help but think that Hibari was right, and hoped when they did figure it all out it wouldn't cost them something more than they've already paid.

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Gah frick! I edited this and them my comp went forward without permission and all my edit's werent saved! *grrrrr* But I think I got them all back in there.

But annnyyyywaysssss! I hope you all enjoyed!

Oh so just to clarify, since I havent really states, they are all Seniors and are all around 17, with Hibari being 18.

As always review and tell me what ya think please!

See you next chapter! Ill be updating soon. Yay*0*


	8. Chapter Seven: Protected

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Alrighty here ya'll go! Just a little bit more angst I promise, maybe two chapters worth…maybe…^^ Gah Im getting uber busy so sorry if I haven't replied to your review for last chapter yet! I promise I will! Reborn might be a lil OOC in this chapter…just a lil bit. Mmmmm sry of this chapter seems a lil rushed as well.

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Walking After You

Chapter Seven: Protected

So here Gokudera was again leaning comfortably into the bleachers as he watched Yamamoto practice. Ten minutes into the practice and already he found his self confused and disappointed. Yamamoto sucked today, really bad. They had him start off as a pitcher, his throws were crazy, going everywhere but where he meant them to go, he even hit two players, before they switched him to first base. He wasn't any good there either, he missed every single ball that was thrown to him, even missing one that Gokudera swore he could have easily caught. Gokudera was quite far away, but he could easily tell that Yamamoto was pissed, he could even hear him growl when every he missed a catch.

'What the hell….What's up with him today?'

"Wow I never knew Yamamoto could suck so bad."

"Ugh.." Gokudera choked and his cigarette which he had inhaled into most of his mouth, causing him to cough violently as he attempted to spit it out.

"Reborn!" Tsuna's voiced scolded," Ahh are you okay Gokudera?"

"T-Tsuna, R-Reborn j-jeez you scared me...I-im fine" He laughed embarrassed that he almost swallowed his cigarette whole.

Reborn's eyes flashed. 'This is more serious than I thought. I was pouring out my aura out, Yamamoto could probably feel it from here. I assumed that Gokudera's body would possibly remember how to react even though he his mind doesn't remember. He should have sensed something...'

Yamamoto in fact did feel Reborn's aura drifting across the field, he glanced towards Gokudera and saw that Tsuna and Reborn were now with him, he clenched his fist tightly and grinded his teeth. He was already embarassing his self enough in front of Gokudera, but now he'd be doing it in front of both Tsuna and Reborn as well.

"Reborn's right though, I've never seen Yamamoto play this badly before." Tsuna said, his voice concerned, as he sat next to Gokudera, who had turned his attention back to Yamamoto, who was now being yelled at by his coach. They all watched in silence as Yamamoto took a harsh scolding, he remained silent the entire time only nodding his head. After his coach was done he sat on the bench, roughly throwing his glove on the ground.

"Hiiiii he looks mad…"Tsuna mumbled still entranced at Yamamoto's behavior. It was always rare to see Yamamoto mad, but no matter what the reason, Tsuna didn't like it, it didn't suit Yamamoto to be angry.

"He's distracted. He's not concentrating at all." Reborn stated, earning a glance form both Gokudera and Tsuna, who both silently agreed.

"So Gokudera how are you doing?" Reborn asked changing the subject abruptly.

"Jeez you all worry to much, I'm fine, really." He stated dryly continuing to stare at Yamamoto fumming in the dug out. "I'm not going to break you know."

"Goku-"

"That's where your right Gokudera." Reborn interrupted Tsuna "After all you cant break what's already broken right."

Gokudera stiffened, his mouth opening as he tried to speak but nothing came out. It wasn't a question. It was a fact, and Gokudera knew it.

Tsuna's eyes were as wide as saucers and his heart ached to see such a pained expression cross one of his dear friends face.

"Reborn!" Tsuna snapped standing up, "Take that bac--"

"Be quiet dame Tsuna!" Reborn said before landing a kick in Tsuna's face, knocking him back into the ground. "Are you really content in this state Gokudera? Or have you just given up all together? If you continue on like this your just going to get in their way. Your going to drag them down with you". Reborn continued his voice stern, every word hitting Gokudera like a slap to the face, as his eyes bore into Gokudera's wide ones. "The Gokudera that you once used to be would never let that happen."

"Ow….Reborn! What's your problem?" Tsuna grumbled holding his now bloody nose. "Gokudera..? His voice was quiet and filled with concern looking at his friend who had yet said anything, but seemed to be frozen in a state of shock.

"Come on were going." Reborn stated grabbing Tsuna's t-shirt collar.

"Ahhh ehhh Reborn wait apologize….Argh…Gokudera Im sorry….Oi Reborn!" Tsuna yelled back at Gokudera as he was drug up the stairs and out of sight.

'I know I know I know!' Gokudera screamed in his head. He knew he was a burden. He knew he was worrying them. He knew he was the cause of Yamamoto's change in personality, that he was causing him pain. He knew, but what the hell was he suppose to do. How was he suppose to make everything alright. He unclenched his fists, he could see small indents in his palms form his nails, a few of them were bleeding.

"Ughh.." He groaned out loud slumping against the next bleacher level for support and stared at the sky, pulling out a fresh ciagrette and lighting it. 'If only I could remember…'

"Dammit…" He growled angrily bringing his fist down hard onto the metal bench. He inhaled his cigarette deeply, ignoring the numbness of his hand.

"Hayato?"

Gokudera sat up quickly, wincing slightly as his hand throbbed.

Yamamoto tilted his head at him, his brows were furrowed, he was obviously in a bad mood still, and a bit confused as to why Gokudera was beating the bleachers up.

"I'm going to change then we can go." He told Gokudera, his voice flat.

"O-okay…" He nodded. Without another word Yamamoto turned and retreated to the changing rooms. 'Idiot. I know, I've done this with you hundreds of times. Why did he come tell me that?'

"_He's distracted. He's not concentrating at all." _

Guilt rushed over Gokudera as he realized that through the entire game Yamamoto had been throwing quick glances in _his_ direction. It was his fault. He was distracting Yamamoto, the reason he couldn't concentrate…..'Why though? Was he worried Id leave? Wait. Was it what happened this morning?'

"_Tch, were going to be late dammit! Why didn't you wake me sooner Yamamoto." Gokudera snarled loudly speed walking down the hall while he tied his tie._

_Huffing grumpily he rounded the hall and into the kitchen and froze. Yamamoto stood at the table, holding a bottle of the one and only prescription Gokudera took now, the antidepressants. _

_Gokudera had been doing a great job of hiding them, tucked safely under the kitchen sink, until now apparently._

_Yamamoto didn't look up at Gokudera as he stood silently waiting for Yamamoto to say something. Yamamoto bit his lip and set the bottle back on the table, picked up his book bag, passed Gokudera, and opened the door to leave._

_Gokudera opened his mouth to speak, but was frozen. 'What the hell! He just walked right pass me.'_

"_Say something!" Gokudera yelled as Yamamoto exited the apartment, the door almost closed behind him. _

_Yamamoto stopped, his figure hidden behind the door._

"_I understand, I do…I think anyways. But maybe you wouldn't-uh-If you would only try some..." He sighed regretting saying that. "I'm tired too Hayato". Was all he said before closing the door, leaving a very shocked and confused Gokudera in the kitchen._

Gokudera caught up to Yamamoto a few minutes later, he was waiting silently a few blocks ahead for him, they didn't speak the entire way to school. Gokudera trailed behind him, keeping a short distance between them. They barely spoke that entire day, only speaking when Tsuna spoke to them or asked concerned questions about their sudden silence.

Gokudera didn't know what to say. He had stopped taking them around the time Yamamoto's nightmares started happening, they were a waste and didn't seem to be helping at all, so why take them. Of coarse by this time he had almost taken them all, leaving only a few behind, which was probably what he assumed had bothered Yamamoto the most. What was he suppose to say to him? Was he suppose to defend his reasoning for taking them? Was he suppose to just continue on like nothing had ever happened? It was all just to complicated for his sleep deprived mind to deal with.

Yamamoto didn't know what to think. Somewhere in the back of his head he knew, always knew since day one that Gokudera had been feeling that way, but forced his self not to think that way, to ignore the signs, to come up with some other reason Gokudera was acting the way he was. He didn't blame Gokudera, he would probably feel the same way if he was in Gokudera's position. He just couldn't get the look of Gokudera's face out of his head, once he knew he knew, he looked guilty. Like he had been caught doing something he knew he shouldn't be doing. Yamamoto regretted the way he left the apartment the moment he closed the door. He just didn't know how to deal with it, now that it was so openly placed in front of him. It scared him. He wanted to apologize for his behavior but didn't know how, and instead avoided Gokudera's eyes the rest of the day.

It was the ear shattering explosion that snapped Gokudera from his thoughts, sending him flying forward into the small fence, knocking the wind out of him, that rested in front of the bleachers.

Said explosion had Tsuna and Reborn freezing in their tracks, and quickly making them make their way towards it, which they realized was where they just were.

The loud rumble that shook the changing room had Yamamoto, who was in the middle of changing out of his uniform pants, quickly pulling them up and buttoning them as he rushed out of the changing room, pushing his teammates, who were huddling in the door to get out, out of the way. 'Hayato!'

Coughing and gagging Gokudera caught his breath, hanging limply over the small fence for support, gasping for air, as he clenched his side. 'Metal meeting bone is never a good thing..'

"Tsk tsk tsk your still alive Gokudera Hayato?"

An icy voice spoke form behind him, sending not so pleasant chills down his spine. He whipped his self around quickly and painfully, and found his self quite thankful he chose to sit where he did. From the eighth row and up was now in rubble, and about ten rows up in the middle stood the one the voice belonged to.

He looked to be around Gokudera's age and not much taller than him. He had creamy peach colored skin, with bright red hair that fell into his piercing thin yellow eyes, and over his heavily pierced ears. He wore a large teal belt with a square and diamond buckle to hold his lose fitting dark blue jeans that were tattered and torn at the knees. He wore a simple black t-shirt that had a large red skull graphic in the lower left corner, several necklaces and chains also hung over his chest.

"What a shame, and here I thought I had finally gotten rid of you."

Gokudera shivered, his voice lost in his throat. He shifted his position against the feence and slowly started sliding to the left, towards the changing room he knew Yamamoto was currently occuping. The man began walking slowly down the demolished metal benches. 'Who the hell is this guy?'

"My my, it seems I will just have to kill you again then."

Before Gokudera even got a chance to speak let alone move, the man was in front of him, grabbing the front of his shirt, pulling him and slamming him face first into the ground, knocking the wind out of him.

'Déjà vu.' He couldn't help but think as his face made contact with hard cold concrete again, he felt his teeth slice into his cheeks, and the familiar iron taste filled his mouth. He choked for air as he was drug back up by the back of his shirt, his collar digging painfully into his jugular. Once up he took this chance and twisted his body towards the man, kneeing him as hard as he could muster in the stomach. The man stumbled back a few steps, giving Gokudera the chance to run, and oh yes did he take it. Unfortunately he didn't make it that far before a stinging hit to his back sent him stumbling and tripping forward. He hissed in pain as his palms scrapped against the concrete as he slid across the ground, his stomach scrapping against the concrete as he fell completely. The moment he regained his balance he flipped his self over, laying on his back. It happened again, he didn't even have time to brace his self as the man bared down on him, his hand hitting Gokudera's chest hard, knocking the wind out of him once again and preventing him from getting up. Gokudera saw stars as he head slammed into the hard concrete as a fist collided with his face, he felt a familiar sharp pain rip through the back of his head, that had his eyes blurring, and tears stinging the corners of them. He pushed Gokudera along the concrete row and across the stairs till he hit the small wall, pinning him to the ground more effectively.

"Running away? How pathetic."

"B-bast-ard….g-get t-the fu-uck o-of-ff.." Gokudera snarled spitting out blood as his fingers clawed at the hands that were wrapping themselves painfully around his throat. The sudden constriction and tightening of his chest terrified him. He struggled fiercely, his knees continuously trying to make contact with the man, who ignored his movements and gripped his throat more tightly. The man's yellow, vicious eyes bore into his fading green ones. 'F-fuck..' It was all happening so fast he could barely register it all.

His chest burned.

"_After all you cant break what's already broken right." _

His throat was dry.

"_If you continue on like this your just going to get in their way_."

He couldn't see.

"_And your going to drag them down with you"_

He couldn't breath.

"_He's distracted. He's not concentrating at all." _

He couldn't feel.

"_If you would only try"_

His body was numb.

"_I'm tired too Hayato."_

"HAYATO!"

Suddenly his chest was released, and he was gasping for air as the hands released his neck, allowing him to breath. Panting and gasping heavily he pushed his self up upon his elbows weakly, his eyes straining to focus on the back of a very shirtless Yamamoto who stood in front of him. Gripped in one of his hands was his katana but it was now engulfed in a bright blue flame, the other one held three hilts and handles of, was it even a sword, Gokudera couldn't see the blade at all, it was just short blue flame that burned brightly. A small swallow surrounded by the same flame, flew circles a little above Yamamoto's head, and at his feet was a brown and white dog that had the same blue flames flowing from his ears.

'What the hell is with all the animals?'

"Y-y-am….-o-ot-to…" Gokudera gasped lowly, his throat burning with every syllable he spoke, as he choked slightly on the blood that filled his mouth from his cut cheek.

A low growl rumbled from Yamamoto's lips as he braced his feet firmly a few feet in front of Gokudera, his eyes glaring at the red head, whose face was full of annoyance due to the sudden interruption.

"Yamamoto Takeshi eh?" The man sneered, his voice filled with disgust, "I have no interest in you."

"Like I give a damn." Yamamoto's rumbled dangerously. The sound of it sent chills down Gokudera's spine, he was quite grateful that Yamamoto was on his side that's for sure. "Who are you?"

"That I will save for another day." The red head spoke, "For I guarantee you we will be seeing each other again Vongola Rain Guardian."

'So he's mafia. He knows me and of the Vongola.'

Yamamoto hissed angrily, launching his self at the man in such a swift movement that Gokudera didn't even realize he was no longer in front of him until he saw Yamamoto face to face with the red head, swinging his sword at him, the man easily dodge it and jumped to one of the bleachers.

"Tsk tsk tsk, is that all you have oh great left hand of the Vongola Decimo?" He sneered, a large sick smile upon his face as he taunted Yamamoto, who grinded his teeth hard, and gripped his Shigure Kintoki painfully.

"I like that look in your eyes, Yamamoto Takeshi." He sneered, his eyes glinting with excitement. "But your in the way." He growled as he sprinted down the bleacher and directly at Yamamoto.

Yamamoto stood his ground as braced his feet for impact, and it came, much harder than he expected though, and had him sliding back almost toppling over Gokudera legs, who was still sprawled in his same position, forcing his eyes to keep up with their swift movements, as he came into contact with them.

"He." The man laughed inches from Yamamoto's face, a small dagger forced up against Yamamoto's katana. 'Tch..so powerful." He inhaled harshly, digging his heals harder into the ground.

"If you dodge this your beloved will take the hit." The mans smile widened happily as he tossed a baseball sized red ball between them, the fuse was lit and not even a half an inch from detonating.

Yamamoto didn't hesitate, he didn't think, as he watched the fused ball float towards them, and the red headed stranger as he disappeared a huge smile spread across his face. He didn't have time to turn around, so he just threw his self backwards into a wide eyed Gokudera, his arms trying their best to curve backwards and shield him in some way.

He gritted his teeth as he was blinded by the bright light of fire as it went off. First he felt the heavy pressure of the force of the blast, pushing him painfully harder into Gokudera, his head slamming into the small cement wall. Then came the unbearable heat of the fire, followed by the worst pain he had ever felt. The heat licked and scorched his skin, he felt something entering his skin painfully, cutting into him, into his face, into his eyes. Then it was cold, the feeling of the wind blew over him and he knew no more.

* * *

Sooo ya its a little rushed . Sorry^^ But I hope you enjoyed anyways.

Oh my a new chara in the form of a meany redhead *gasp* He's an OC btw if any of you thought it might be IriexD

Aww Yama protected 'Dera 3 Yay! What's in store for these two now.

As always tell me what you think! Reviews are what make my fingers move!


	9. Chapter Eight: A Change of Roles

Warnings

: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Ok, ok sorry it took me a bit to get this out. Ive had about 4 other separate stories floating around my head and they were blocking my writing ability for this story so I had to get them written down and out of the way! Jeez lol anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter! I feel a lemon coming up…perhaps next chapter? *-* Oh this chapter contains Super super OCC Gokudera btw!

'…'= Thoughts

"…"= Speech

'_blah blah'_= Dreams/Flashbacks

* * *

Walking After You

Chapter Eight: A Change of Roles

Black.

"Uh…Where am I?'

I squinted my eyes into the darkness, nothing, just a vase blackness. I waved my hand ecstatically in front of me, fear rising in me. I couldn't even see my own hand.

'What the hell is going on? Where was I?'

I opened his mouth to call out, but nothing came out.

'What--'I tried again, my mouth gaping opening and closing, my voice still stubbornly not coming out. My blood began pumping through my veins faster as I started to panic. I inhaled deeply, only to fall to my knees, gripping my throat, realizing I wasn't breathing any air in.

'The hell--'

I gasped trying to inhale and exhale, but nothing flowed into my lungs. It was as if there was no oxygen where ever I was. My fingers grasped at my throat, which burned painfully, sweat rolling down my face. This feeling, it felt so familiar.

All I could see was the darkness that engulfed me, but I felt like my vision was blurring. I was starting to see darkness that was darker than my surroundings. I tottered on my knees, swaying back and forth as my mind went cloudy, tears spilling from my eyes.

'Why? Why, was this happening to me? I don't understand.'

I numbly felt my body fall sideways and onto the cold surface of what I assumed to be the ground, and everything went white.

* * *

"_Che stupid bastard what the hell do you think your doing?" I snapped, failing horribly to fill my voice with irritation._

_Takeshi laughed, his grin turning into a wide smirk._

"_Nothing." He spoke coyly in my ear nipping playfully at my ear lobe. I bit my lip as I allowed a subtle moan escape my lips. _

_And just like that I had already lost the battle, just like always. _

_My eyebrow twitched._

"_Fucking pervert." I growled into Takeshi's own ear, as I struggled to release my arms from his grip, as he pinned me to the bed, his hips gently straddling me._

_Takeshi chuckled quietly ignoring me, and kissed my neck softly. He continued down my neck, leaving kisses and nips in his wake, sucking gently on the 'sweet spot' just above my collar bone, and once again was rewarded with a soft moan from me. _

'_Damn him! It was always like this. I was the one who always got swept away by this stupid baseball freak.'_

_My eyes rolled into my head, my hands sliding through his soft hair, as his lips gently caressed my erect nipple._

'_When the hell did my shirt get taken off?'_

"_Still want me to get off?" Takeshi asked his teeth grazing against my sensitive skin as he spoke. His hot husky breath sent shivers down my spine and straight to my groin._

_Bastard. He always got his way. Its not like it mattered though. I too, always got my way in the end as well._

"_Tch. Shut up bastard." I snarled, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him into me, crashing our lips together roughly. He groaned into my mouth as his lips curved into a smirk._

* * *

_"Juudaime!" I shouted, my voice filled with concern, rage filling my body as I sprinted into the smoke, Takeshi right behind me._

_"Tsuna!"_

_"O-over he-ere.."Tsuna coughed._

_"Juudaime!" I spun to Tsuna's direction, but was distracted by a guttery "uugh" from behind me. I spun to look behind me and saw Takeshi pinned to the pavement, his Shigure Kintoki the only thing stopping his blue eyed attacker's katana from slicing his own throat._

_"Takeshi!" I ran forward to help him, but was forced to stop as a small colored ball rolled to my feet. Recognizing what it was immediately, I jumped out of the way, thankfully only receiving a few cuts and a whole lot of dust in my eyes when it exploded._

_"Hayato!" I could hear Takeshi yelling, his voice high. I went to yell to him, my voice catching on the smoke and dust I inhaled causing me to cough numerously. I cursed under my breath as the smoke cleared revealing, Takeshi in mid-fight with the blue eyed boy, his eyes briefly met mine, relief filling them. _

_The bright yellow orange flame from the corner of my eye revealed the Juudaime hovering a few feet from the ground, dodging some kind of flame energy ball that was hurled at him._

_"Spacing out?" An oddly familiar voice brought me back to my situation, I flinched as I felt this persons sickly hot breath on my neck. _

_Unintentionally, I shivered, before spinning around and backing away, my double-bombs attack ready in my fingers. I ran each wick through my dying cigarette before throwing them in the direction of the voice, catching a glimpse of bright red before they exploded. I cursed again seeing someone dart out of the smoke of my attack. I gasped at the unharmed man as he leered at me, dusting off his dark purple shirt. _

_"V-vix?" I smile only widened, I took that as a yes._

_Nonchalantly he launched his self at me. I tensed slightly as he threw a punch at me, I ducked and dodged it, sending my left fist into his groaned and dug his feet into the ground, refusing to be knocked off his feet._

_'Just a few more seconds'. _

_I skittered backwards, trying to draw some distance between us. Nix growled. I smirked at him as three of the bombs I dropped went off. I heard him incoherently yell as he leaped from the blast and charged at me, his face full of rage, his right arm dripping with a heavy amount of blood. _

'_Che, barely nicked him.'_

_I slid to the left avoiding the small object he threw at me. The object hit the pavement behind me exploding instantly. My eyes widened slightly._

_'What a pain in the ass. Those things would hurt like hell if I let my self get hit by one of them.'_

_Vix cursed again, obvious frustration written all over his face. _

_I blinked in surprise as a figure flew between us, slamming into the pavement hard."Takeshi!" I gasped as he struggled to get up, his lip bleeding fiercely. He responded to me with a grunt, before pulling his self fully up. _

_Vix took advantage of my sudden distraction and plowed his fist into my stomach, causing me to gag and gasp out painfully. He chuckled and added more force to his punch sending me skidding backwards. I stumbled forward onto my knees trying to catch my breath._

_I heard Takeshi voice, and looked to him, as he watched me gasping for air. His eyes were wide and his lips curled in anger as Vix stalked towards me. I saw Takeshi's feet move towards me, but he didn't get far before he was forced to spin around, his sword blocking a hard blow from his opponent. _

_I was still distracted, watching Takeshi's every move, my stomach lurching uncomfortably, I could tell he was starting to slow down slightly. _

_I didn't even know Vix was standing behind me. I yelled out in pain as he pulled my right arm behind me jerking it fiercely. I felt everything as it was pulled back and snapped loudly, the pain coursed through my entire body. I cussed over and over in both Japanese and Italian, spitting upon the pavement as I leaned forward, practically kissing it. 'God it hurts so fucking bad.'_

_My broken arm still gripped firmly in Vix's grip, he quickly pulled me up to my feet and spun me, throwing me. I could only gasp as I hit pavement hard, blood filling my mouth as I bit my tongue. I coughed, choking on the blood. I looked up and was surprised to see Nix wasn't there. No one was. Where was Takeshi and the Juudaime. Just how far had I been thrown. We had traveled from the battle zone, and had become separated from the others. I could faintly hear the sounds of the them fighting not to far away. _

_I glanced around, noticing I was by a rundown building near Kokuyo Land. I spit out my crumpled cigarette and grimed, pain shooting through my arm as I stood up, my left hand gripped it tightly. Deciding it would be better to take refuge in the building, I quickly and quietly entered it, leaving bombs in my wake. I was surprised as the ground erupted with an explosion just inches in front of me, as I almost reached its center. I cringed and scrambled backwards, some of the debris cutting my face and arms. I squinted my eyes in the dark trying to locate Vix. _

'_Where the hell was he?' _

_I heard it soaring through the air before it hit and quickly removed my self from its path easily._

_I cursed at my self, at my sheer stupidity. I fell for it so easily. I realized I was standing in the center of the room. A dead on target._

_"Shit-" was all I got out as it hit me, pain ripping through my side, sending me stumbling sideways to the ground, yelling out and cussing in pain. The fire flickered in my eyes, burning my skin, my clothes. My broken arm dangled limply blood flowing relentlessly from it. I coughed as blood began to fill my lungs, barely catching my breath as another one hit me. It hit me in the same spot, though this time claiming more of my back. I fell painfully on my face, my broken arm crumbling beneath me pathetically, as I attempted to use it to break my fall. My remaining arm, struggled and shook violently as I tried to hold my self up with it. I gagged at the heavy smell of my blood that invaded my nostrils. My body was beginning to go numb as I tried to pull my self together, my head spinning rapidly, aiding my stomach in lurching more violently. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, trying to focus my blurring vision, but to no avail. _

_My arm gave out and I hit the ground weakly with a small grunt escaping my eyes spun as they focused at a pair of shoes directly in front of me, I followed up them, greeted with bright red._

_"Tsk tsk tsk. I'd say this makes us even. Don't cha think?" Nix chuckled darkly as he pulled out another mini bomb. My eyes slid in and out of focus as I watched it fall from his hands before he disappeared from sight. At this point I could think of one thing and one thing only: "Takeshi" before pain sneered through me and I knew no more._

Gokudera's eyes snapped open as he shot up quickly panting and sweating heavily. His dazed eyes searched the room franticly, it was empty. His body was trembling violently from his dream. He ran two shaky hands through his silver hair.

'A dream? It felt so real. That building..that red head…no, that was no dream. That was a memory. But….that first one?' His pale clammy face turned to blush as he recalled it. 'There was no mistake that was Yamamoto, and that that was him. That was him and Yamamoto. What the hell?' He shook his head lightly 'No no it wasn't, it couldn't be…But that might explain…..So we we're more than just friends..? No..Im imagining things..right?'

"Oh Gokudera your awake!' Tsuna's voice rang out nervously. "Are you okay?" He asked hurriedly seeing Gokudera clutching his hair tightly.

Gokudera dropped his hands and looked to Tsuna who was tottering nervously in the doorway.

"Im fine. Whe-ere am I?" Gokudera asked, his voice came out raspy and dry. Pain shot across his face as he spoke, particularly to his nose. He brought a shaky hand to it, it was covered in a large bandage, he could also feel some running along his forehead.

"Dr. Shamal's house." Tsuna replied entering the room slowly, his hands twitching and fidgeting in front of him. "How do you feel?" Tsuna in the back of his mind, feared the answer he would receive. He feared that Gokudera's minor head injury had caused further problems. Though he felt relieved that Gokudera hadn't asked him who he was yet. That must be a good sign so far, right?

"Oh.." He briefly remembered meeting the man before at his welcome back party, and the serious beating he had received from Bianchi. "Uh fine I guess a little sore..ah Yamamoto? Ah the red head and Yamamoto!" He realized mid sentence. How could he forget! The last thing he remembered was Yamamoto's back slamming painfully into his face, well I guess that explained his nose.

"Ah well.." Tsuna's eyes avoided looking into Gokudera's directly. Gokudera's stomach dropped. "Well h-hes f-fine m-more or less…" He mumbled.

"W-what? What do you mean?" Gokudera asked his voice strangled in his throat, fear coursing through him.

"H-he uh..He got hurt kinda bad..you know.." Tsuna continued to mumble fidgeting on his feet with every word he spoke, driving Gokudera crazy.

"H-how bad..?" He stuttered.

"Why don't you just see for your self?" Reborn's voice echoed in the room.

Gokudera nodded, and slowly got to his feet, his head spun but he ignored it forcing his self to move forward. He exited the room with both the eyes of Tsuna and Reborn watching him closely and carefully. Once in the hall he found Shamal, who greeted him with a 'You owe me, I don't treat men ya know,' comment before telling him about his injuries.

Thankfully he wasn't all that injured, just a mild concussion, a very sore throat, a few cuts, scrapes, and bruises. The worst he had to admit was his broken nose, it ached painfully resonating along with his aching headache.

Shamal showed him to Yamamoto's room, which was two doors down from his, next to the restroom, it was originally Shamal's room.

Gokudera gasped quietly, standing in the door way of the room, as Yamamoto came into his view.

"Its nothing to serious. But it could have been worse, much worse." Shamal told Gokudera, standing behind him. "For both of you."

"What-"

"His eyes will heal on there own in a day or so, thankfully not to much debris got into them." Shamal answered Gokudera's question before he could ask it. "The main problem is his vocal cords, they are paralyzed. So speaking is going to be a major problem for him."

Gokudera turned to look at Shamal, his eyes wide in disbelief.

"Pa-paralyzed? W-what? How is that even possible?" Gokudera gaped.

"Its not that uncommon. In Yamamoto's case it was caused from the neck and head trauma he received from the explosion most likely. It should heal on its own in a week or so, If not then he'll need surgery to fix them." Shamal told him, leaning onto the hall wall, "From what Reborn and Tsuna told me how they found you two, Yamamoto must have protected you."

"Uh-ye-eah..He he uh protected me f-from..t-the…" Gokudera mumbled turning back to look upon Yamamoto, he kind of looked like a mummy. Both his eyes and throat were heavily wrapped in bandages, covering the usually revealed tanned skin.

Guilt filled him, followed by was all his fault. Yamamoto was in this state because of him, his eyes, his voice, it was all his fault. He rubbed his face dully with both his hands. He flinched slightly as a warm hand clasped his shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly.

"Don't blame your self to much kid. He already knows. He woke a little while a go, he seemed pretty agitated, I could only guess that he was worried about you. " Shamal said quietly before retreating back to where both Tsuna and Reborn waited.

Gokudera entered the room and settled his self in a chair besides Yamamoto's bed. He glance upon Yamamoto's heavily bandaged face, most of it focused around his eye area, and then onto his neck. His hand trembled as he brought it to Yamamoto's face touching it lightly, it felt cold, not the usual warm it usual felt. He felt tears stinging at his eyes as his hand grazed slowly up the tanned face, his fingers barely touching the bandages as he lingered on Yamamoto's eyes.

The dream, memory whatever it was that he had experienced only moment before, floated into his head. Was it real? Or was his imagination getting away from his self? He recalled the feeling he was feeling in the memory: Contentment, happiness, need, lust, desire, caring, love. All of them, he felt them for Yamamoto. But what about now. Yes, he felt that he needed Yamamoto. Since the moment he woke up he's needed Yamamoto. But was that because he was always there? The only one there from the very begining? True, he felt quite content and peaceful around him, especially when he held him in his arms while they slept. Even though things were getting kind of rough at the moment, he was happy. Happy that Yamamoto remained by his side, silently trying to understand what he was going through. But lust, desire, and love? He had to admit that he found Yamamoto quite attractive, and could never stop his eyes from noticing his finely sculpted body as he only slept in boxers. And he always found his self blushing, his stomach filling with butterflies, when Yamamoto would hold him close, when he smiled, when he laughed, when his fingers would lightly graze his fingers or skin by accident.

He was brought back to reality by a warm clammy hand grasping onto his out stretched arm.

"H---h---.." Yamamoto hoarsely tried to speak.

"No no don't speak." Gokudera told him sternly, withdrawing his hand form Yamamoto's face and taking hold of Yamamoto's and pulling into both of his own.

Yamamoto did as he was told.

"Shamal, he's awake.." Gokudera called into the hall, his body twisting towards the door.

Gokudera returned back to Yamamoto, his face bumping into Yamamoto's hand that was blindingly feeling through the air, it rested upon Gokudera's cheek, touching him gently. The feel of those warm clammy fingertips against Gokudera's skin sent his stomach fluttering. He couldn't stop his self as he pushed his face deeper into Yamamoto's touch, who jerked his head slightly in surprise, but didn't pull away.

"Shamal's coming right now."

Yamamoto only replied with his thumb, rubbing it against Gokudera's skin. "Your going to be fine." Gokudera told him, taking Yamamoto's hand from his face and holding it gently in his own, intertwining their fingers. "Your going to be fine. Ill take care of you this time." He said again, more to his self than Yamamoto.

They didn't stay long at Shamal's and left a few hours later. Gokudera had insisted to Tsuna and Reborn that he be the one to take care of Yamamoto. 'It's the least I can do. Besides I want to.' He told them. Both of them kind of figured that it was going to be like that and didn't protest it.

After Gokudera had received enough bandages and supplies for a week he escorted Yamamoto, his hand still in Gokudera's, down the street and too their apartment. Gokudera felt a little sense of déjà vu as they walked down the sidewalk, the roles obviously changed this time around. Before it had been him that was being guided through the unfamilar towm. But now it was him guiding the blinded Yamamoto.

The moment Gokudera entered the house, he needed a cigarette, but resisted as he guided Yamamoto inside, making sure he didn't bump or trip into anything.

"Okay, Shamal said no trying to talk at least one day." Gokudera ordered Yamamoto, who nodded as they entered the kitchen. "Umm what would you like to do? Just nod kay?" Gokudera asked him after guiding him into the chair. "Drink." No. "Food?" No. "Sleep." Yes. "Okay, come on then, I'll make you something to eat later."

Taking Yamamoto's hand, Gokudera escorted him into the bedroom, apologizing as Yamamoto stumbled on one of Gokudera's shoes that littered the floor.

After Yamamoto was seated on the bed Gokudera rushed around the room, hissing curses at his own laziness for not picking up after his self. He blindly threw the mess he had picked up into the closet, before turning back to Yamamoto, who was still seated upon the bed.

"Just boxers again?"

Yamamoto nodded and attempted to remove his shirt, but struggled with it ridiculously. His arms felt like jelly and didn't have the strength to raise above his head.

"Alright at least let me help you then." Gokudera huffed taking hold of the shirt. Yamamoto gave up and allowed Gokudera to take the lead from there, and was surprised when his shirt didn't lift off his head but instead was replaced by a loud rip sound.

Gokudera seemed to have decided that there was no possible way of getting Yamamoto's tight collared t-shirt over his head without possibly hurting his neck, so he did the next best thing and ripped it off of him instead. Though in this process, an extremely dirty thought drifted through Gokudera's mind as he imagined ripping Yamamoto's shirt off for another reason. His face turned scarlet at his own perverseness.

The light smirk that graced Yamamoto's lips made Gokudera smile, and swore that if Yamamoto could he'd probably be chuckling right now.

"I'll buy you a new one later."

Gokudera coughed nervously filling the silence as he bent forward, the tips of his hair tickling Yamamoto's bare chest, as he went to undo Yamamoto's jeans. At this moment he was kind of glad that Yamamoto couldn't see him, his face was so red that he didn't even think it classified as being red any longer. He felt Yamamoto shiver as his fingers slid under the hem of his jeans, grazing his skin as he unbuttoned them. Yamamoto's hands suddenly grasped Gokudera's, stopping them as they began unzipping his zipper. Gokudera stiffened and glanced up at Yamamoto.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable." He told Yamamoto removing his hands from his pants quickly. Yamamoto's hands blindly shot forward for Gokudera's, only being able to grab one of them, and shook his head side to side, a smile upon his face.

Gokudera titled his head in confusion. "Mm…no? No what? No I didn't make you uncomfortable?" Gokudera guessed.

Yes, Yamamoto shook his head. Yamamoto had nearly lost control at just the small touch he received from Gokudera. If he continued to let Gokudera undress him, things would turn out very differently. Yamamoto wasn't ready for the consequences that 'that' would cause, esspecially when Gokudera was so clueless as to their former relationship. He smiled at Gokudera before standing up and taking his pants off on his own, tottering slightly.

Gokudera was mildly confused, but that didn't matter right now.

Yamamoto let out a strange breath, in which Gokudera assumed to be a sigh as he fell back upon the bed, and crawled under the covers. His body was so sore, and the soft sheets felt like heaven on his skin.

Gokudera looked down at him a frown forming upon his face. 'He looks like a little kid.'

"Ill bring you some water." He spoke quietly as he left the room, returning seconds later with a small glass of water.

Gokudera sat on the edge of the bed softly "Here, drink some water at least." Gokudera told him, his arm sliding behind Yamamoto's head to help him sit up. Yamamoto's hand blindly searched for the cup, and tightly grasped onto it as Gokudera guided it into his hand. He drank the entire thing.

"Do you want more?"

No.

"Okay.." Gokudera took the cup from Yamamoto and stood up, but was pulled back down to the bed by Yamamoto's hand, which was wrapped tightly around his arm. "What? You want something else?"

Yes.

"Food?"

No.

"More water?" No. "A bath?" No. Gokudera sighed, this was going to be harder than he thought, "Tch. Then what? What else is there?" Yamamoto's hand released his arm and pointed, his index finger out into his chest. "Mmm..What?"

Again Yamamoto's finger poked his chest.

"Me? What? You want me?" Gokudera blushed at his own choice of words.

Yamamoto nodded and Gokudera blushed deeper.

Yamamoto took hold of his arm once again and pulled him this time, yanking him towards him, then he pointed to the empty space next to him.

"Oh..you want me.." Gokudera finally got it.

Yes.

Gokudera smiled and then let out a small sigh. "Fine." He was tired as well anyways.

He too stripped his self down into his boxers and crawled into bed.

Usually when they slept Yamamoto would pull him close to him and hold him tightly. But Gokudera didn't feel right about that, it was his turn to help Yamamoto. So instead he scooted over to Yamamoto, wrapped his arms around him, and pulled him tightly into his chest.

Yamamoto let out a small strangled gasp as he was pulled into Gokudera's warm chest. Eagerly he turned to face Gokudera, and cuddled into his chest more, nestling his head in the crook of Gokudera's neck. Gokudera blushed deeply and let out a sigh, as his eyes dropped with sleep.

As he held Yamamoto close to him, he came to a decision. It didn't matter if it was just a dream or his memory. It didn't matter and he didn't care, because it was now, this moment that he finally gave in, and realized that he had fallen in love with this goofy baseball freak from day one.

"Thank you." Gokudera whispered quietly into Yamamoto's ear, unsure if he was awake or asleep. "Thank you for sav-"

He froze, his eyes snapping open as a pair of soft warm lips pressed gently against his. His stomach did back flips, summersaults, cartwheels, you name it, it did them. He was nervous, unsure how to react or what to do. But at the same time was overflowing with happiness and joy. Was this really happening? He wasn't dreaming right?

The withdrawal of the said lips snapped him out of his cataclysmic thoughts. Yamamoto's head remained inches from his, waiting for some kind of response. He felt sick to his stomach. He had been rejected. Gokudera remained stiff and ridged in his kiss. It was obvious he didn't like it at all. Yamamoto slowly began to pull away, but Gokudera wouldn't allow him, and pulled Yamamoto back to him, their lips meeting once again.

Now it was Yamamoto that froze, realizing it was Gokudera's lips upon his. He could die right now, feeling those familiar supple buds against his. Oh how he missed them, and didn't hesitate to push back against them.

Gokudera sighed, loving the feeling, and parted his lips slightly, Yamamoto took advantage of this and dove his tongue into Gokudera's warm cavern.

Gokudera was a little surprised and shocked as he felt Yamamoto's tongue explore every inch of his mouth, grazing over his teeth and flicking at his tongue playfully, but of coarse all that subsided, and he melted into him. He pushed his own muscle against Yamamoto's, receiving an odd grunt from him, as they battled for dominance. Gokudera willingly lost.

Several seconds later they separated gasping and panting for air. Yamamoto coughed roughtly and gripped his throat, his nose scrunched up in pain.

"I-Im so-orry." Gokudera apologized through pants, rushing up to get another glass of water.

Yamamoto gratefully drank it all before collapsing back onto his pillow, completely exhausted, as adrenaline and lust coursed through his veins.

Gokudera remained silent as he returned to the bed, surprised what had just taken place, not to mention the hardening erection he was now sporting.

Yamamoto cuddled into Gokudera's chest immediately. Neither of them resummed their previous actions or made any attempt to. It was enough for now.

The brief moment that hey shared even if they never shared it again, was enough. Weather they both had done it out of selfishness or to feel something other than the pain. They didnt care.

All they both wanted to do was to savior the moment, holding each other in their arms, before finally falling off into a blissful sleep.

* * *

Okay! As always tell me what you think!

This chapter was a lil weird to write so sorry if it seems rushed or awkward .

Soo yeah finally we will be getting to the lemon chapater! Oohh next one! LOL I hope I dont screw it up xD

Thanks for reading! See ya next chapter^^


	10. Chapter Nine: Show Me

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**Beta by:** ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Ahhh so here it is the chapter you've been waiting for. THE LEMON! Hopefully its not a total epic fail _ Anywho I wanna thank ClaymoreDarkAlicia who helped alot with this chapter and beta'd, yay, THANK YOU^^! Any ways on with the chapter!

'…'= Thoughts

"…"= Speech

'_blah blah'_= Dreams/Flashbacks

* * *

Walking After You

Chapter Nine: Show Me

"Che. Hold still, would you," Gokudera growled. "Don't blame me if I hurt you." Gokudera's fingers slowly slid across Yamamoto's eyelids, a fair amount of antibiotic coating them.

Yamamoto stopped shifting around to allow Gokudera to finish. The antibiotic slightly stung the small cuts, and left his eyelids dully burning. It was quite uncomfortable and Yamamoto didn't like it at all.

"Okay. Now, slowly," Gokudera ordered him sternly.

And Yamamoto did so, carefully and slowly bringing his eyes until they were fully open.

It had been three days now since they had left Shamal's and, to Gokudera's relief, Yamamoto's eyes were healing quickly. His voice was healing quite quickly as well, though he did have trouble speaking louder than a whisper, but at least he was able to speak. They both were grateful for that fact, Gokudera especially. The first day had been the worst. Yamamoto was still extremely sleepy and worn out from the day's earlier events and wanted to do nothing but sleep, which left Gokudera struggling to find something to preoccupy himself with. He failed at this quite easily: only two hours into the day and he had found himself huffing and sprawled out on the couch, staring at the ceiling. He had made an attempt to read some of his books, but instead he had only ended up reading the same sentence over and over several times before he gave up. So he had turned his attention to the TV and of course there was nothing on that caught his interest. So he had moved on into the kitchen and begun cleaning. He hadn't got very far for it had been already clean, which had lead to where he had found himself after those two hours, staring at the ceiling.

A shiver had ran through his body and he had sat up, looking around the room. His chest had tightened slightly as his ears had focused on the lack of sound that filled his apartment. He had shifted uncomfortably, pulling a cigarette from its pack, lighting it and inhaling quickly. Unfortunately his cigarette didn't do its usual job of calming him down, and after several minutes of pacing and panting he had retreated back into the bedroom where he could be distracted by Yamamoto's breathing. He had sighed in relief while listening to Yamamoto's loud breathing filling the room and making him finally able to calm himself.

He couldn't stand the silence anymore and was more than grateful when Yamamoto's rasping voice returned.

Gokudera watched Yamamoto carefully, still crouched down in between his legs, as the latter sat on the covered toilet seat.

Yamamoto blinked several times while glancing about the room, and chuckled softly hearing Gokudera huff in annoyance.

"Well?" Gokudera growled in anticipation.

Yamamoto's eyes fell down to a hazy figure of Gokudera, and reached his hand out to touch him. He was closer than he had expected and almost poked him in the eye. However, he could at least make out Gokudera's features now and he was no longer a loud silver blur.

"I'll take that as a no," he answered for him, allowing Yamamoto to run his fingers through his hair.

"H-hay-yato..." Yamamoto struggled to begin.

Gokudera sighed, standing up, and retreated out of the room, returning seconds later along with the fresh smell of tobacco and smoke.

Yamamoto tried to focus his eyes on Gokudera as he shuffled to turn the shower on.

To say the least, things had been a little awkward since their little make out session. Neither of them had made any attempts to resume what they had started, not to mention they hadn't said one word about it either.

Gokudera was unsure how to strike up the conversation and, to say the least, he was embarrassed. Though he had all these overwhelming emotions that he now felt towards Yamamoto and didn't know what to do with them.

Yamamoto, on the other hand, feared that possibly Gokudera might be mad at him for it. He had so many questions he wanted to ask Gokudera. Did he want to kiss him? Why had he done it? But, more than ever, he wanted to tell Gokudera how he truly felt, and about their relationship before his accident. But that same fear of being rejected by Gokudera held him back, thought he didn't know for how much longer.

"Oi- Takeshi!" Gokudera snapped, pointing his cigarette down at him as he stood over him. "Che. Am I that boring? You're always spacing out around me..." Gokudera mumbled grumpily, staring down at a wide eyed Yamamoto.

"Huh…what?" Gokudera asked bending down eye level to the other. "What's wrong? Are you okay?" His voice was now worried as Yamamoto continued to stare at him, his mouth open, tears filling his injured eyes.

Gokudera went to stand up, but Yamamoto pulled him back down to him, his grip tight and painful on his arm.

"W-what the hell?" Gokudera asked again, wincing slightly.

"M-my n-n-ame-e…" Yamamoto finally struggled to get out.

"Huh?"

"Y-y-ou s-sa'd m-my n-ame..."

"Huh?" Gokudera was confused now. Had he? He certainly didn't remember doing so... or wait. A blush covered his face as he recalled calling 'Takeshi'. It had rolled off his tongue so easily and familiarly that he hadn't even realized he had said it.

"A-again…"

"W-what?" Gokudera stuttered, blushing even more, weakly struggling to get out of Yamamoto's grasp.

"S-sa-ay a-ag-ain-n..."

"W-what the h-hell are you talking about?"

"Pl-lease..." Yamamoto begged. His voice was quite, barely audible, yet filled with desperation as he held on to Gokudera, who was stumbling as he struggled to stand up, pulling Yamamoto up with him.

"Wha-wh-hy?"

Shocked and surprised at Yamamoto's sudden change in personality, Gokudera surveyed him closely, his heart clenching painfully at the sight of Yamamoto's face contorted as if he too was in pain, his eyes filled with tears, pleading him to simply say his name.

"T-takeshi…" he said quietly, determined not to look Yamamoto in the eye. He turned away from him, the deepest blush gracing his face.

"Ah, the shower-" Gokudera said, taking notice of the shower, hot water on full blast and a thick layer of steam now beginning to fill the bathroom.

He sidestepped, pulling himself out of Yamamoto's grasp, his cigarette in his fingers as he rushed to turn it off. Gokudera never even got close, for the next thing he knew he was being roughly pushed back into the bathroom wall, his yelp of surprise muffled by Yamamoto's tongue forcing its way into his open mouth. He hesitated for a brief second, before relaxing into Yamamoto's desperate kiss, his arms sliding up Yamamoto's back.

Yamamoto groaned in pleasure as Gokudera's tongue responded back, his groan sending shivers straight to Gokudera's groin.

When they finally pulled apart, panting for air, Yamamoto wasted no time and immediately went for the blurred pale flesh he saw. Gokudera moaned quietly, an extreme blush crossing his face at his own voice, as Yamamoto bit down hard on his neck, sucking the abused flesh till it bruised, and continued further down.

Not knowing what to do, Gokudera quickly crushed out his cigarette on the wall, and took fistfuls of Yamamoto's hair, pulling at it gently as Yamamoto's lips once again returned to his mouth, ravishing every inch of it.

His body shivered and trembled in pleasure when Yamamoto's fingers dove under his shirt and lightly grazed across his nipples, his body automatically arching into the touch. He let his head fall backwards and hit the wall while Yamamoto traced kisses up his torso with painful slowness, feeling every groove his body contained.

'God, who knew that would feel good. I'm pathetic. All he's doing is touching me and it feels so fucking good!' Gokudera let a small moan escape his lips, causing Yamamoto's hardening erection to twitch painfully. Yamamoto didn't realize till now just how much he missed the sound of his lover, how badly he missed this connection they once had. He wanted to hear more. He wanted to make Gokudera moan. He wanted to make him scream. He wanted him withering in pleasure under him, screaming his name.

Yamamoto pushed Gokudera harder into the wall, grinding his hips harshly into Gokudera's. Both boys gasped and groaned at the delicious friction. Gokudera gasped, slightly embarrassed realizing his very hardened erection while Yamamoto ran his own up against his, their clothes painfully restricting their contact.

Panting heavily, Yamamoto rested his head against Gokudera's shoulder, their bodies sweating in the steamy heat that continued to engulf the bathroom as they rolled their hips together harshly.

Gokudera gasped for air, the heated room beginning to make his breathing quite difficult, and his head slowly started to spin. But he didn't care, it felt way too damn good for him to even think about, and his thoughts were quickly drowned out by the pleasure that flooded through his body.

Gokudera's head soon began to spin faster and his body trembled, his knees and legs threatening to give away. He clung onto Yamamoto tightly for fear of collapsing.

It wasn't enough. He wanted more. Wanted to feel more, wanted to feel Yamamoto.

Gokudera broke from Yamamoto's lips pulling Yamamoto's shirt quickly over his head. He didn't protest and took the chance to desperately tug at Gokudera's own shirt and rapidly pull it off as well. He quickly returned to kissing Gokudera's neck, finding his sweet spot and sucking it viciously, his tongue lapping greedily at the pale flesh.

Gokudera moaned loudly, and pushed roughly against the wall. Finally green eyes met amber ones, both of them swimming with lust. Gokudera blushed at the way Yamamoto looked at him, with his eyes staring straight into his, half-lidded and filled with want and lust, a light tinge of pink gracing the usually tanned gold cheeks while sweat rolled down his smooth skin and down his chest.

Gokudera gulped for he couldn't stop the burning question before it fell from his lips.

"Takeshi, what am I to you?" Gokudera asked, his voice ragged. "I mean, what was I to you before I lost my -uh-memories?"

Yamamoto looked down at the half-lidded, lust filled eyes of his former lover, the very question he had been dying to answer finally presented to him. He had gone over it hundreds and hundreds of times in his head, what he would say, how he would tell him, but now in the moment, his mind was completely blank and he couldn't find anything to say.

"Nothing huh?" Gokudera sighed in defeat, the heat of the room threatening to overtake him. "I'm not stupid, you know. I see the way you look at me. You're one of the very few people that call me Hayato. You never leave my side, and are willing to do whatever I ask you. Why? Do you pity me that much?" Gokudera laughed hollowly, sweat rolling off him as he hunched over, his hands resting on his knees for support.

"I actually thought that possibly we might have been… that we were something more, I even had this dream and we…" he trailed off, his voice breaking as tears slid down his face.

'Such a fool. I'm such a fool.'

Gokudera's eyes snapped open as he was pulled up and felt a warm wet muscle traveling up his face, licking up his tears.

His eyes met Yamamoto's: they were no longer filled with lust and want, but were softened and filled with nothing but what he could see as love.

"Ha-hayato, Hayato, Hayato…" Yamamoto mumbled, taking Gokudera's face into his hands and gently brushing their lips together.

Gradually, Gokudera's eyes closed as his soft lips moved slowly against his own.

"Hayato, I love you."

Gokudera's eyes snapped back open, his heart racing dangerously fast, as Yamamoto pulled back to look at him. 'What? What did he just say?'

"I love you so much, Hayato. I always have and always will."

Gokudera's confused eyes stared back into Yamamoto's.

"S-so we, um… were we…"

"Lovers? Yes," Yamamoto answered for him, a smile gracing his face.

So many emotions overtook Gokudera at the moment that he couldn't feel or identify them all. He just threw himself at Yamamoto, roughly bringing their lips back together.

Yamamoto sighed into the kiss, his hands gliding into and through the silver locks.

They pulled away panting.

"I-I'm sorry, I don't remember what we had," Gokudera admitted, his glazed eyes boring into Yamamoto's, "S-so, show me."

Yamamoto stiffened slightly in Gokudera's arms before relaxing.

"Hayato…?" He questioned.

"I w-want to remember," Gokudera explained, extremely embarrassed at his perverted request, "I want to feel what we had." His grip tightened on Yamamoto's arms, emphasizing his need.

"Are you sure…?" Yamamoto questioned again.

His answer was Gokudera's tongue sliding over his bottom lip, biting it playfully. A shiver ran down his spine, and he didn't need to hear anymore.

Yamamoto pulled back from Gokudera and allowed him to turn off the shower, the heat of the steam hitting him directly in the face. Once it was off, he took hold of Gokudera's hand and practically drug him into the bedroom.

Once inside, Gokudera stood next to the bed and fidgeted nervously. Yamamoto wrapped his arms around him, licking the shell of his ear. Gokudera's eyes rolled along with his head, exposing more of his neck to the latter, who began to plant light kisses along it.

Once Yamamoto noticed Gokudera's body relax some, he gently pushed him onto the bed, and slowly crawled on top of him, his tongue gliding up the blushing Italian's torso, dipping in his navel, then up his abs to gently caress a erect nipple. Gokudera moaned, and arched his back when the skillful tongue swirled around his nipple, his hands diving once again into the other's hair. Not being able to allow his mouth to be alone any longer, he pulled Yamamoto's face towards him, and thankfully Yamamoto got the picture and crawled up him until their lips met, moving together desperately.

Yamamoto groaned as their erections met again, and roughly grinded them together. Gokudera's fingers twisted in his hair as he let out a low moan, sending tremors through Yamamoto's body once pulled away from Gokudera and ventured down, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants quickly, and pulled them both off him.

Gokudera squirmed, feeling embarrassed under the heavy gaze of Yamamoto as the latter looked him over. He looked away from him and was just about to speak when unimaginable pleasure flooded him, as his erect member was engulfed in such sinful heat he could barely breath. He moaned loudly and instinctively bucked his hips further into the warmth. Yamamoto's head bobbed back, avoiding gagging on the hardened member, while his strong hands pushed Gokudera's hips down into the bed so he wouldn't do it again.

Gokudera moaned as the same skillful tongue swirled around his member's head, his soon to be lovers teeth grazing the sensitive flesh before dipping into the slit, tasting the saltiness of precum. Yamamoto continued his ministrations, driving the panting Italian crazy and making him wither in pleasure, the coil in his stomach tightening with each suck.

"S-suck," Yamamoto suddenly told him, his tongue slowly moving up his shaft. Gokudera shuddered at the sight, and he nearly came when his erection immediately grew harder. Eyeing the three fingers that were offered him, he did as he was told and took them into his mouth and sucked them eagerly, wrapping his tongue around each one. Yamamoto continued licking the member playfully, wanting to please him but not wanting to make him come just yet. Eventually, he withdrew his fingers from Gokudera's mouth, deeming them lubricated enough.

Gokudera watched, panting heavily as the fingers were brought to his puckered entrance and slowly traced it, receiving a twitch and light moan from him as they did so.

In sync with his tongue upon Gokudera's member, he slowly inserted the first digit. Gokudera stiffened and squirmed at the odd intrusion, but shook it off his mind as it began to slide in and out of him. His breath hitched slightly when the second digit entered, bringing an uncomfortable burning sensation.

He furrowed his eyebrows before falling back into bliss when his member was sucked harshly, forcing him to forget the slight pain he was feeling. Yamamoto began scissoring his fingers, stretching the tight entrance slowly. He barely felt the third digit as it slid in, since he was too busy being filled with tremors of pleasure that heated tongue working magic on his member.

If he thought that felt good, man was he wrong. He moaned loudly, surprising himself again when his vision temporarily disappeared and his body shivered with pleasure the moment his 'sweet spot' was hit.

Yamamoto smirked, letting his lovers member go with a 'pop', his fingers brushing against the 'sweet spot' a few more times before bringing the latter withering and panting with need, his hips pushing down onto his fingers, craving more.

"T-tak-esh-shi…" Gokudera clawed at him, his fingers trailing down the tanned flesh sharply.

Without a second thought, Yamamoto withdrew his fingers, chuckling lightly when he received a disappointed groan from Gokudera, and he quickly discarded his pants and boxers.

Gokudera blushed, seeing Yamamoto's very well endowed leaking member for the first time.

'Shit, it's fucking huge.'

Yamamoto wasted no time and returned to his lover, climbing over the panting pale figure slowly, dragging his body along him as he did. Gokudera growled and received a amused chuckled, before their lips met again, each of their tongues diving into each other's mouth before pulling away for air.

"Are you sure?" Yamamoto asked raggedly.

Once again his question was not answered by Gokudera's voice, but rather by a hand, as it wrapped its self around his member and roughly pumped him. Yamamoto's eyes rolled in his head, his arms threatening to give out.

"Nngh, H-Hayato…" He let out in a ragged breath as the cool hands released him, slender fingers sliding across his precum filled slit and rubbing it gently, almost taking Yamamoto over the edge.

He pulled away from Gokudera and reached over to the bedside table, opening the drawer, and pulling out a small bottle.

"So we do it a lot," Gokudera stated.

Yamamoto chuckled, opening the small bottle of lube and covering his member with the liquid. His smile brought a deepened blush from his lover.

"Tch. What a pervert," Gokudera mumbled.

Yamamoto wanted to laugh but didn't want to get distracted in the moment, and he positioned himself at Gokudera's entrance.

Gokudera tensed when Yamamoto's slickened member grazed it.

"Just relax, and let me show you," Yamamoto soothed in his ear licking it gently.

Gokudera nodded, and let his eyes slide closed, forcing his tensed muscles to relax. Slowly, Yamamoto guided his member into the tight entrance of his lover, who winced, and fingers griped the sheets tightly. Yamamoto panted as his member was engulfed almost painfully in such tight heat that he thought he would come any second.

It hurt, it hurt like hell. Gokudera felt like he was slowly being ripped in two as Yamamoto slowly filled him up. He was obviously much larger than three fingers. Gokudera let a pained gasp escape his lips as the other finally fully filled him.

"Relax," Yamamoto whispered roughly against his lips, remaining painfully still inside him, waiting for him to become accustomed to the feeling.

Gokudera opened his eyes, looking at panting boy above him, who kindly looked back at him, kissing his lips gently, before shifting his mouth across his jaw line then onto his neck. His hands slowly slid out of Yamamoto's hair and onto his back, tracing his shoulder blades.

"Takeshi, move," he growled quietly against the latter's ear.

Yamamoto willingly did as he was told, and slowly slid almost all the way out before thrusting back in. Gokudera howled out in both pain and pleasure as his now lover continuously thrust into him slowly. Then it didn't hurt at all, in fact a strange sense of déjà vu overcame him.

"F-faster…" he moaned, craving more of the feeling, "Harder, carve it into m-my mind so I-I'll-ah- n-never forget."

Yamamoto was happy to do so, and buried himself into his lover, faster, harder, deeper, until he had him in a inconceivable state of bliss. Angling himself, he made sure he hit the moaning Italian's prostrate with each thrust.

Gokudera was reduced to a sweating, panting, withering state of pleasure as Yamamoto buried his face in the crook of Gokudera's neck, licking and biting his flesh, as he filled Gokudera up over and over, the Italian's erection rubbing harshly in between their withering bodies, bringing him closer to the edge.

His fingers remained upon the baseball players back, clawing at him, leaving small scratches down it, some of them drawing blood. The latter felt the nails digging into his back, but didn't care, it only turned him on even more.

Their steady rhythm quickened in pace, Gokudera meeting each of Yamamoto's thrust, driving him deeper inside him. Yamamoto knew they both were close, and took Gokudera's dripping member, and pumped it along with each of his thrusts, causing the pale boy to moan even louder.

"T-tak-keshi!" He moaned loudly as he came hard onto their stomachs.

Yamamoto groaned, sitting up, his lips ravishing his mouth, as the muscles tightened around his member, bringing him over the edge and he came hard into the boy, his lover swallowing a moan of his name. Out of breath he collapsed onto Gokudera, both of them exhausted and panting heavily, before he slowly rolled off the boy, pulling his softening member out of him while doing so..

Gokudera moaned, disappointed that Yamamoto was no longer inside of him. In his tired state he briefly felt something soft and wet traveling across his torso and chest that was cleaning up the seed he had spilled. He felt the warm body of his lover return to the bed, and curled into his arms and Yamamoto wrapped them eagerly around him. And they fell into a blissfully sleep, not caring what tomorrow would bring.

* * *

*fidgets*

Okay okay tell how bad it was.

See you next chapter! *-*


	11. Chapter Ten: Nightmares

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**A/N: **Okay, so sorry for taking so long to update. I got distracted by this super kitten I found on my bday, yay! Any who, this chapter is a little bit shorter than the rest, but is filled with some intresting info and some lovely YamaxGoku. Well I must say **THANK YOU**! for all the lovely encouraging reviews you all sent to me about my first lemon. I'm so glad it wasn't a total epic fail. I love you all! *hugs* We are also almost at 100 reviews *gasp* I never imagined I'd get so many reviews for my little fic. Thank you all so much! Since our awesome beta is on vacation, I'm posting the un'beta'd version, and will repost the beta'd version when ever she gets a chance to beta it. So excuse any errors please^^

* * *

_Walking After You_

_Chapter Ten: Nightmares_

_"Hahaha..." Takeshi laughed loudly, "Don't be so shy Hayato. Come on, just one." He chuckled throwing his arm over my shoulder and pulling me to him._

_"Ah…what the hell baseball freak!" I snapped, a prominent blush covering my cheeks as I struggled to get out of his hold._

_"Now now, just smile.." Takeshi chuckled again, kissing my cheek lightly before throwing out the peace sign to the Tenth, who was readying the camera. My face burned even fiercer._

_"1...2..3..." Click._

* * *

"_Now, I have a few things I'm curious about?" Gamma asked, "When did Vongola the Tenth come back to life? I really need to know the details about that."_

_I remained standing there, frozen, fear beginning to pulse through my veins as Takeshi remained unconscious a few feet away._

_I slightly began to panic as he drawled on telling me why my attack had no effect on him. _

_I franticly glanced around me. 'What to do, what to do. What do I do?' _

_I raced through my head, trying to come up with an attack that would successfully hit Gamma giving me enough time to grab Takeshi and run. But I wouldn't get very far lugging him around._

"_-However if the Vongola the Tenth is alive, then this is no small matter. Many of my comrades watched him get shot to death."_

_I froze. My breath hitched in my throat and my heart stopped._

'_Shot to death?'_

_The panic and fear that coursed through my veins was quickly replaced with and overwhelming feeling of anger._

'_They shot the tenth?'_

_My chest tightened and my body shook with anger as Gamma continued to watch me, a smug look upon his face. _

'_How dare they. How dare they. How dare they do such a shameless thing. Bastards. Fuckers.'_

"_Bastards..."I was barely able to get out through gritted teeth. "How dare you!"I arched back and brought my Flame arrow up and prepared to attack, "I won't forgive you!" I yelled, anger over flooding my senses. _

_I fired a direct shot but Gamma easily dodged it, launching his foxes straight at me. _

_I watched in slow motion as the foxes made their way to me, I couldn't even move as I took a direct hit and yelled out in pain._

_Pain beyond unimaginable pain coursed through my body. I yelled out feeling the electricity coarse through me. I tried to remain on my feet but the pain was so unimaginable that my wobbly legs gave away and I fell backwards onto the ground, the pain still shocking through me. I could barely breath as I heard the loud footsteps of Gamma advancing towards me._

* * *

Gokudera sat up quickly, wrenching himself from Yamamoto's hold, panting for air, arms trembling, and sweat dripping from his face.

"H-hayato?"

He franticly looked around the room gasping for air before jumping out of bed and dashing down the hall into the bathroom.

Gokudera collapsed onto the toilet seat, gripping onto it tightly as he threw up.

"Hayato!" he heard Yamamoto call, as best he could in a quiet voice, worriedly behind him. Seconds later he felt Yamamoto's hand reassuringly rubbing circles in his back as he threw up again.

Gokudera could still fell the anger and fear coursing through his veins from his dream, not to mention the pain. His muscles ached and twitched as if it hadn't been a dream at all.

"W-who's Gamma?" Gokudera choked out, coughing into the toilet some, a string of saliva clung to his chin.

When he received no answer from Yamamoto behind him, he turned his head to look at him.

"What did you say?" Yamamoto gasped quietly at him once their eyes had met.

"I said who the hell is Gamma?" Gokudera asked again, allowing his body to slump against the bath tub for support, as he seemed to be finished throwing up.

Yamamoto's eyes widened as he fell to his knees, scooting towards Gokudera and taking his arms into his hands.

"What did you just say?" Yamamoto asked again, shaking Gokudera lightly.

"Fuck… How many times do I have to say it!" Gokudera snapped, irked that he had to repeat himself once again. "Who. The. Hell. Is. Gamma?" he growled each word slowly making sure Yamamoto finally understood.

"You remembered!" Yamamoto breathed smiling at him, before dropping his head down in relief.

"Huh? So all that really did happen?" Gokudera confirmed to himself. "He was shot. They killed him… Tsuna..." he mumbled to himself, only ending up slightly confused.

Yamamoto looked up at him and the confused look upon his face.

"You don't remember everything?" he asked Gokudera, slightly cress fallen.

Gokudera bit his lip and averted his eyes from Yamamoto's as he shook his head 'no'.

"Oh…" Yamamoto said quietly.

Silence filled the bathroom while the two boxers only clad boys pondered over Gokudera's recent breakthrough, before Gokudera groaned and held his stomach.

"Are you okay?" Yamamoto asked, ashamed at himself that he hadn't asked Gokudera this sooner.

Gokudera numbly nodded a yes as he pushed himself to his feet.

"Are you sure?" Yamamoto asked again rising to his feet with him.

"Yeah…" He answered quietly, squeezing past Yamamoto as he attempted to exit the bathroom.

Gokudera made it to the door before he was pulled backwards. He gasped as he was spun around, Yamamoto's lips silencing the curses he was about to yell at him.

Gokudera melted into the kiss and wrapped his arms around Yamamoto, holding onto him tightly. Yamamoto's tongue slid over his lips asking for entrance, Gokudera of course granted him easily and Yamamoto's tongue eagerly entered and began re-exploring his mouth.

The Italian moaned quietly as Yamamoto ravished his mouth before breaking the kiss for oxygen and resting his forehead upon his.

"I'm sorry Hayato," Yamamoto apologized, "I'm really happy. I am. It's a slow start but I'm really happy that you're remembering things. I only wished you'd remember happier things." Yamamoto's lips lightly brushed against his, Gokudera pushed forward, pulling Yamamoto closer to him and deepening the kiss. He must have been so obvious, for Yamamoto to see that he had felt slightly saddened that his sudden remembering had disappointed Yamamoto rather than making him happy.

Gokudera couldn't help but feel slightly proud as Yamamoto moaned into the kiss, eagerly and happily bucking his hips against Gokudera's. Both boys moaned as pleasure flooded them. His lips still latched upon Gokudera's own, Yamamoto pushed his lover backwards. Gokudera got the idea and walked backwards, dragging Yamamoto with him, and exited the bathroom.

The two boys stumbled down the hall, their hands roaming each other's bodies as their tongues continued to battle for dominance. They entered the bedroom and broke apart gasping for air. Yamamoto dove for Gokudera's neck kissing and sucking it gently as he pushed him backwards onto the bed.

Gokudera moaned and bucked his hips into Yamamoto's, the thin fabric of their boxers creating a fabulous friction between their hardening members.

Gokudera allowed his hands to trace Yamamoto's toned flesh before sliding down his torso to play with the hem of his boxers. Skillfully he lightly sucked at Yamamoto's ear lobe as his fingers dove in his boxers and gripped his hardened member.

Yamamoto gasped and groaned into the Italian's neck as his cold hands started slowly stroking the aroused muscle.

"H-hayato…" Yamamoto moaned biting Gokudera's shoulder as his hand slid underneath Gokudera's own boxers and began doing the same.

A lust filled moan escaped Gokudera's lips as Yamamoto's burning hot hands pumped his erection.

Their lips once again met as they pumped each other's member in sync. Not being able to hold back anymore, Yamamoto released Gokudera's member, who whimpered at the loss of pleasure, and pulled Gokudera's boxers off him.

"Ah….ahh…" Gokudera moaned as his erect member was released and two of Yamamoto's digits entered him and began slowly stretching him.

"Just do it already…" Gokudera moaned impatiently, wanting to feel Yamamoto inside him. Even though they had only just done it once before, that Gokudera could remember anyways, his body ached for Yamamoto, craved for him to fill him again and again.

"Ah, I see you two made up," a hauntingly familiar voice spoke, "Am I interrupting?"

Both boys froze, their widened surprised eyes falling upon the small figure of Reborn, who stood in their bedroom doorway.

"Argh… what the fuck!" Gokudera shouted, launching himself out from under Yamamoto and onto the floor on the other side of the bed, concealing his naked body.

Yamamoto sighed, letting his head fall to the bed, not surprised by the intrusion.

"Yes we have. And yes you are interrupting," Yamamoto told him bluntly before swinging himself around to sit at the edge of the bed.

"Oh well excuse me. I'll be quick and you can return to your previous activities."

Gokudera scoffed at Reborn and Yamamoto from the other side of the bed, his entire body a heavy shade of red.

'What the hell is wrong with these two? They act like this isn't the first time they've been in this situation.'

Gokudera carefully averted his eyes from Reborn's, briefly remembering what Reborn had told him at the baseball field. Guilt coiled in the pit of his stomach since he undoubtedly agreed with what Reborn had told him. After all Yamamoto's condition, even though he was almost completely healed, was more than proof that what Reborn spoke was true. He only ended up getting in the way and Yamamoto ended up getting hurt because of him.

"Gokudera, pay attention because this involves you too," Reborn snapped at him, bringing him out of his thoughts. Gokudera perked himself up and propped himself onto the bed on his arms, making sure to still conceal his lower half from Reborn's eyes, and nodded.

"I've got some information on the one who attacked you," Reborn's eyes looked at them seriously.

Gokudera's eyes widened and Yamamoto's muscles stiffened as he sat up straighter.

"His name is Vix Donnola(1), and he's a member of the Giaguaro(2) Family. He's seventeen years old and seems to have some sort of past with the Vongola, which I'm currently looking into what sort of past."

They all sat in silence as they all retained and comprehended the new information.

'Vix, Vix…' the name sounded so familiar to Gokudera as he repeated over and over in his head.

'Oh!" he exclaimed out loud, surprising Yamamoto and causing him to jump.

"What is it, Gokudera?" Reborn asked him as both him and Yamamoto stared at Gokudera confused and curious.

"I remember him," Gokudera told them recalling his dream.

"What? You know him?" Yamamoto asked turning towards Gokudera more.

"Yeah. He's the bastard that attacked me that night of the accident…' he trailed off, recalling himself calling the man his name over and over as if he knew him. "I kept calling him Vix… like I knew him… but I can't remember…" he went on, seemingly having a conversation with himself and fell into deep thought.

"I see, that might make things easier for me," Reborn broke the silence.

"Kid?"

"Mm... Either way, don't let your guard down, he may come back, since he's already attacked Gokudera twice now. This may mean he's after Gokudera. Or you just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. But I doubt that, so be careful."

They both nodded.

"Well, anyway, resume what you two were doing," Reborn announced, jumping on to the dresser and opening the window. "See you two later," was all he said before jumping out the window and disappearing.

Gokudera sighed and flopped his upper half on the bed, feeling like he could die. Reborn just had to see him in the most private and intimate position ever.

"Takeshi?" he asked muffled as Yamamoto remained silent and still.

"Mmm?"

"Does this happen often?"

"What? Being attacked? Yeah, I guess bu-"

"No, Reborn?"

"Oh…hahaha… Yeah, kind of."

Gokudera sighed even more heavily now. Yamamoto chuckled and crawled over to him, kissing the top of his head.

Gokudera looked up at him, they looked at each for a few seconds before Yamamoto smiled and leaned in, kissing him softly.

"So, where were we?" Yamamoto spoke against his lips, sending shiver of excitement down Gokudera's spine.

"Pervert," Gokudera growled at him before kissing him back. "You'll tell me everything." Gokudera spoke sternly, breaking their heated kiss. It wasn't a question. He wanted to know everything. He wanted to know who Gamma was, and why he had literally kicked both of their asses, let alone why the hell he had said Tsuna was killed, when he was so very much alive just blocks away.

"Yeah," Yamamoto assed the question first before he answered. He really didn't want to tell Gokudera about all their adventures in ten years in the future, it all was just so confusing. But he had no right to deny him. "I'll tell you everything."

* * *

So their you have it. Please review and tell me what you think.

Sorry its so short, the next one will be nice and long. I promise^^

And dont forget to read the message from our lovely beta!

See you next chapter!

**ClaymoreDarkAlicia**: So, what, Gokudera? He's just catching up on the ridiculous amount of time he spent restraining his corporal needs! Prepare for a week of hot hardcore manly sex and say goodbye to your ass' sanity, the readers waited eight chapters and a prologue for this. *thumbs up*Guys, don't you think this story is amazing, too =w= ? Reborn, waaay to go.

*1: Donnola means Weasel in Italian.

*2: Giaguaro means Jaguar in Italian.


	12. Chapter Eleven: Moving Forward

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, torture, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! **If ya don't like then please don't read.**

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**Beta'd by: **ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Forgivvvveeee mee! Im sooo sorry it took me sooo long to get this out to you! Its a small chapter too, Im sorry, but I had to get something out to you guys. I hope you all like it though!As always thank you to all you who review and to all you who review each and every chapter, I love you all! Without further blabbling here you guys go, WAY chapter Eleven!

* * *

_Walking After You_

_Chapter Eleven: Moving Forward_

Gokudera sighed, dropping his head under the hot rushing water of his shower. He closed his eyes, loving the feeling of the heat soothing his aching muscles. Reluctantly, he turned the shower off and stepped out. He grabbed two light teal towels from the top of the toilet seat and wrapped one around his waist while he began ruffling his hair dry with the other.

He sighed; he still just couldn't get his nightmare out of his mind. Yes, it was a nightmare, not a memory, for if it was, Yamamoto wouldn't be laying in his bed right now. He could still remember every bit of it though and it continued to plague his thoughts.

"_Tsk tsk tsk… Hayato. Why must you be so difficult," Vix drawled, his yellow eyes glinting dangerously at me. "This could have been so much easier."_

"_Let him go, you bastard!" I snarled, taking a few steps forward, one arm stretched out, reaching for Takeshi, while my other curled around the dynamite in my pocket._

"_Now, why on earth would I want to do that?" Vix asked, his eyes wide and comical. He was mocking me and it pissed me off._

"_You want me, so let him go dammit!" I growled. I was angry, and I was hitting my limit as Vix continued to circle Takeshi like a hawk, the gun in his hand pointed directly at his head._

"_I do want you. But it would be so fun to see your face when I kill your lover!" he howled loudly, a maniac grin appearing across his face while he grabbed a hand full of Takeshi's hair and pulled his head back, shoving the gun into his throat roughly._

"_No, don't!" I yelled, running forward. _

_Everything suddenly seemed to be moving in slow motion. I rushed forward but seemed to be getting nowhere. I watched horrified as Takeshi opened his eyes and looked towards me. They were wide and filled with fear and tears. _

_I yelled out again my voice echoing around me as Vix pulled the trigger. I fell to my knees, inches from Takeshi, when something wet hit my face, freezing my frame, while Takeshi's lifeless figure fell to the earth with a dull thud. I gasped out and gagged, wiping the substance from my face. Blood. Takeshi's blood._

The Italian wiped the cool condensation away from the mirror, bringing his pale face into view. He silently stared at his figure, his pale face, absent of the blood from his nightmare, and chest, until his eyes fell onto the tip of his scar. Silver eyebrows furrowed as he lightly touched the mismatched colored skin and traced it from his back and down to the front of his torso.

Ever since he had his stitches removed he had tried his hardest not to look at it, and he always believed it wasn't that bad. But now, as he studied his reflection, tracing the seemingly never ending lines, it looked bigger, uglier, in his eyes. A sudden uneasiness came over him, so much that he felt the need to glance around the restroom, making sure he was truly alone. Pain flashed through his green eyes, as they remained fixed on the pinkish colored flesh. He twisted around, getting a better view of where it began, and grimaced.

If only he didn't have this scar. He would be normal, he wouldn't feel like a stranger in his own body.

He couldn't help but think of what his life would be like now if he had never forgotten anything. He had to assume it would be like what everyone told him it was like.

But it sucked hearing about what your life used to be like, who you were, what you did, who you did. He wanted to remember it for himself. He thought about it every day, it was something he would never forget about, something he would always think about: the simple yet complicated term 'what if?'

He heard the sounds of Yamamoto clattering about in the kitchen and tore his eyes away from his scar and quickly made his way down the hall and into the bedroom before Yamamoto would even get the chance to peek down the hall after him. He grabbed the nearest shirt, not caring if it was clean or dirty, and quickly put it on.

Now with his clothes he didn't feel like doing anything at all, he felt suddenly like all his energy had been sucked form him, and he wanted to do nothing else but sleep. So he did just that, he crawled back into his bed, clothes and all, and fell back to sleep.

* * *

"Hayato? Hayato?" a smooth voice whispered in his ear, tickling at it. He groaned and swatted at the object to go away, receiving a husky chuckle from above him.

"Hayato… we're going to be late for school."

He groaned again, rolling over onto his back and opened his eyes, and was graced with the sight of a grinning Yamamoto, who was hovering over him, one arm on each side of his head.

"You fell back to sleep," he was told as he rubbed his eyes. Yamamoto chuckled softly. "You're so cute when you do that."

The latter blushed and quickly dropped his hand from his face, receiving another chuckle from the brunette, before he leaned down and captured his lips softly. His eyes fluttered closed at the kiss, his arms wrapped themselves around the tanned figure and pulled him closer onto him, deepening the kiss.

The brunette moaned low, when his body made contact with his lovers, feeling the hardening erection coming to life against his thigh. Gokudera pulled away in need for air, while Yamamoto immediately moved to his neck and began sucking and nipping at it softly, receiving low moans from the Italian's mouth as he did so. Gokudera bucked his hips up into the brunette's when he received a harsh suck to his neck, and groaned lowly, feeling the brunette's hardening member rub against his own.

"Ta-takeshi…" he panted, his glazed over eyes looking into glazed amber ones.

Yamamoto got the idea and his fingers were on Gokudera's pants in a second, quickly unbuttoning and unzipping them, before pulling them, boxers and all, off his body.

The Italian gasped, surprised, when his hardened member was released to the cool air and suddenly engulfed in heat. He moaned loudly and threw his head back, arching his back in pure pleasure, as Yamamoto's mouth and tongue ran up and down his member greedily. Moans and curses left the silverette's mouth while lips bobbed up and down his hard member, successfully drowning him further in a sea of please.

"Ah Take-shi… I'm going- ahhh!" he tried to warn the latter before he came hard into his mouth. Lidded green eyes watch him as the brunette sucked and swallowed him dry.

"Will you get up now?" Yamamoto asked innocently, a wide smirk on his face. Gokudera huffed, almost forming his lips into a pout, as the brunette licked his lips for any residue of his lovers seed.

"Fine pervert."

* * *

"Ughh…" he groaned, letting his head hit the grass with a thud.

"Go-Gokudera, are you alright?" Tsuna's face loomed over him, his eyes wide with worry. "He wasn't suppose to do that." The sprawled Italian huffed and pushed himself to his elbows.

Apparently soccer wasn't his sport. Tsuna had explained the rules to him, but nowhere did he say tackling was okay. Thus lead to where he found himself. He finally had got hold of the ball and was just about to pass it, when a sharp elbow and a shove to his side had sent him sprawling on his back.

"I'm fine Tsuna," he answered, taking the hand offered to him and pulling himself to his feet, "Thanks."

"Are you sure? It looked like you took the hit pretty hard," Tsuna said worriedly, looking his silver friend over.

"I'm fine, it just surprised me, that's all," Gokudera admitted, wincing slightly as he stretched, feeling a sharp pain in his side.

"That guy always cheats," Tsuna told him, "Just take it easy and stay out of his way."

The Italian nodded and took off to the field once again, with Tsuna by his side.

Twenty antagonizing minutes later they both were collapsing onto the locker room bench, completely exhausted and panting for air.

He needed a cigarette and dug into his pocket pulling one out of its pack, along with his lighter. He inhaled the drug slowly, loving the prickly feeling it sent throughout his body. He could see Tsuna watching him from the corner of his eye, but he made no objection to the smoke.

"I'll meet you outside then," Tsuna announced, now fully dressed back into his school uniform, his bag in hand.

"Alright," Gokudera nodded to the light haired brunette as he left. He finished his cigarette, putting it out on the floor, and decided it was probably best that he too changed back into his uniform, since he was so slow that he was now the only person left in the locker room. He sighed and began undressing, he couldn't stay in here all day.

It was at that moment, as he sat in the locker room, that he realized he couldn't mope around forever. He couldn't just sit and wait for all his memories to come back flooding in to his head. He couldn't keep this up, it was to exhausting, all the worrying, the wanting, the needing to remember. He was only going to continue hurting those around him, and he didn't want that.

He had to move forward, instead of constantly standing still.

He finished dressing quickly and met up with Tsuna and Hibari outside. Tsuna smiled and waved at him happily, while Hibari seemed to be glaring at him, sizing him up.

"It seems you've finally come to a decision," Hibari stated quietly, interrupting Tsuna, who was chatting with Gokudera about their next class.

"Che."

Hibari chuckled, "It's about time herbivore."

Highly confused, Tsuna looked back and forth from Hibari's face to Gokudera's.

* * *

The days flew by quickly and soon weeks turned into months. He went to school, learned, studied, took tests, tutored both Tsuna and Yamamoto, made an odd friendship, if it could be called that, with Hibari, ate sushi with Yamamoto and his dad, spent some awkward yet refreshing time with his sister, and yelled at Ryohei, a lot.

He smiled, laughed and joked with his friends, and everything seemed to be getting back to how he imagined it would be. They ate lunch everyday on top of the roof, he never got any better at soccer, he had at least three to four cigarettes a day, and he still watched Yamamoto's practices and games.

He enjoyed it. He enjoyed his life, and he was happy. It almost seemed as if nothing had ever happened before. They openly joked about his amnesia and for once it didn't bother him, he just laughed along with them.

Every now and then a dream of a memory would pop up in his head, or he'd see a certain place or object and would briefly remember something, but he was okay with that. He was remembering, that's all he cared about.

The Vongola were obviously still investigating Vix and what he was up to, but they found no trace. It was if he had just disappeared. Which no one really complained about; they were all to grateful for the fact that they no longer felt the need to be on guard every second. But that didn't mean they expected nothing, they were mafia after all.

But none of them, not even Reborn were ready for what would come.

* * *

Yesssss a cliffhanger! Mwuahahahahaha!

Leave a review as always please!

Anywho so I'm thinking that WAY is coming to an end soon *oh noo's* within the next three to four chapter's depending on my bvrain.

I love you all and hope you enjoy!

**ShittyBetaClaymoreDarkAlicia** Comment: I just hate cliffhangers. But I think that the love these guys radiate –proven by important facts like kissing your boyfriend after he had just thrown up his soul and giving free blowjobs every day, every hour– will make everything more painful as the story goes on defeat all the enemies they'll encounter. Yess.

See you next chapter!


	13. Chapter Twelve: Coming of the Storm

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**Beta:** ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Omg...please dont attack me for taking sooo freaking long to update this fic! Lets all just be grateful that I sent this to our beta before my computer crashed!^^ Anywho its not as long as I promised you all but I really wanted to end the chapter right were I ended it soo you'll just have to wait for the next one*-* As always thank you all for all you're lovely reviews! I love you all! We finally made it past 100! Yay *throws confetti* Anywhoooooo on with the chapter!

**Ugh and for some reason my computer wont save the underlining of the Chapter Twelve: Coming of the Storm...so sorry about that =(

* * *

_Walking After You_

_Chapter Twelve: Coming of the Storm_

"Nng…a-ahh…" Gokudera let escape his lips. He quickly brought his hand to cover his mouth, his face flushed a bright pink.

"Hayato, how many times do I have to tell you not to do that," Yamamoto scolded lightly with a grin, taking hold of Gokudera's arm and dragging it away from his mouth. " I want to hear you," he purred, crawling up the withering silverette.

"Sh-shut up you per-vert-ah!" He tried to sound tough, but failed when the brunette grinded hard against his hips.

Their lips met with a harsh crash and their tongues fought each other desperately, with Gokudera losing in the end. They only pulled away when their need for oxygen burned in their lungs.

"I want you, Hayato," Yamamoto panted against his ear, all the while rolling his hips in sync with his own.

Blushing a darker shade of red, the silverette spread his legs slightly, inviting his lover in. Yamamoto smirked at this and ran his hands up and under Gokudera's shirt, rolling over the toned muscles until his shirt was up and over his head. He threw it carelessly to the side, not caring where it went in the end and returned to his lover's naked chest, continuing where he left off.

Gokudera was in heaven, absolute heaven, and they weren't even having sex yet. He still had most of his clothes on, except for his shirt. It was the hot calloused hands of Yamamoto, running up and down his chest, pinching and rubbing his nipples that were sending him spiraling into pure bliss. Hot hands were soon replaced by a hot mouth and tongue, the wet muscle licking and nipping at his flesh greedily. He moaned, gasped, and panted, arching his back and throwing his head back as his talented lover continued his ministrations.

The said brunette couldn't help but smirk as the Italian moaned and called his name, his usually pale cheeks a bright blushing pink. Glazed amber eyes met glazed aqua ones.

It had been months now since they both had excepted and come to terms with Gokudera's memory loss, and it had been months of never ending sex. Most days Yamamoto could hardly control himself, and was more than eager for their winter break to arrive. After their first night together Yamamoto couldn't ever go without the Italian, he craved him, yearned for him, and knew that Gokudera himself felt the same.

Now their relationship was on a whole new level, a level of closeness that they didn't even posses before Gokudera had lost his memory. Had it been because he had to make Gokudera fall in love with him all over again? Yamamoto couldn't describe it in words, but felt it the most when he had Gokudera panting below him.

"Quit being a tease, asshole!" Gokudera meant to snap, but it came out as a whimper. He pushed himself to his elbows and glared down the bed at Yamamoto, who was hovering over the hem of his pants, his fingers toying with his zipper. The brunette smirked and moved up, kissing Gokudera deep and hard.

"A tease? Never," he mused against his lips, unzipping Gokudera's zipper as he did. Gokudera let out a low growl when his pants were pulled from his legs. "I would never tease you, love," Yamamoto returned to his lover's lips, this time kissing them gently. "I'm just savoring every bit of you."

Gokudera scoffed in an attempt of hiding his even deeper blush, watching Yamamoto's smoldering eyes as he pulled off his boxers slowly.

"What is it you want, Hayato?" the brunette asked, taking in his boyfriend's naked perfected figure.

The latter gasped, his mouth gaping open. _'Why does he always have to be like this, it's so damn embarrassing.' _

"All you have to do is tell me," Yamamoto mused quietly, as his hand slid up Gokudera's hardened length, his index finger dipped into the slit, feeling the precum and making Gokudera's eyes roll in the back of his head.

"Y-you know-" was all he managed to get in protest before Yamamoto's hand encased his member and began pumping it rough and slow.

"Tell me Hayato." Yamamoto purred, his other hand dipping down to Gokudera's entrance, licking his lips when he felt it twitch at his touch. Gokudera let out a low long moan when the teasing finger circled his entrance slowly.

"J-just do i-it-"

"Do what, Hayato?"

Gokudera couldn't take it anymore and pushed his entrance on the digit greedily, withering in pleasure when it easily slipped inside.

"F-fuck me, dammit!" he finally snapped, glaring at the smirking brunette.

"See. That wasn't too hard now, was it," the brunette chuckled, adding a second digit, slowly pumping them in and out of the moaning Italian, stretching him, adding the third digit seconds later.

"T-a-Takeshi….please…" he whimpered after what felt like hours, not even a minute in actual time, of Yamamoto's fingers being inside him.

The latter shivered in delight at his lover, his bright pink cheeks, lust glazed over eyes, a little bit of drool running out of the corner of his mouth. He looked absolutely delicious, and he couldn't get his pants off faster.

Within seconds he was positioning himself at Gokudera's entrance, slowing pushing his aching member inside. Once fully hilted inside, he paused, letting his lover get used to the feeling. No matter how many times they made love, each time felt like the first for Yamamoto. Gokudera always remained so tight that it hurt.

When Gokudera rocked his hips against his, he knew it was okay to move and did so without hesitation, slowly pulling almost all the way out before slamming back inside.

Gokudera was moaning, yelling, and gasping for air as Yamamoto made a steady rhythm, making sure to hit his sweet spot with each thrust. Eagerly Gokudera met each one of his thrust and loved the look on Yamamoto's face as he too spiraled into bliss. All to soon Gokudera felt the familiar coil in his stomach coil, ready to spring forward.

"Ah-Take-shi, I'm gonna co- Ahhh!" he arched his back, riding out his orgasm, his muscles clenching down on Yamamoto's member, sending him to his own orgasm as well, yelling his name as he filled him up.

All his energy now drained, Yamamoto fell onto his lover's chest, both of them panting and gasping to catch their breath.

"T-too heavy..." Gokudera almost whined, gently trying to push Yamamoto off him.  
"Ahaha s-sorry..." he slurred, rolling off him. Neither of them made any attempt to clean themselves. The night was still early after all.

* * *

It had been three days since the relentless storm had comfortably settled itself over Namimori, drowning the city in a never ending rain. It had been raining non-stop and it was starting to cause problems throughout the city: the streets and drains were beginning to flood, making it difficult for cars to safely pass down the street without nearly drowning pedestrians on the sidewalk; all after school activities and sports had been cancelled as well, and Yamamoto wasn't too happy about that, his excuse being that 'Of course you can play baseball in the rain, it's baseball.' Whatever that meant. But he was left with no choice but to comply and leave school earlier than usual along with everyone else.

Gokudera himself had been in a bad mood ever since the rain started. He hated the rain. Hated the way it made his clothes and hair cling disgustingly to his skin. He hated the way it made every room he entered feel all humid and gross. He hated the fact that he could not go through a day without getting his clothes completely soaked. And if being wet the entire time wasn't a drag enough, it was freezing on top of that, the forecast had even said there was a large possibility of snow at the end of the week. The rain was such a pain, and he would much rather not leave his apartment at all, but Yamamoto had insisted on him attending school, go figure, because 'your education is important, it's our senior year after all'. He just had to keep reminding himself that there were only two more days till winter break.

So it had been around seven months since his accident and everything was going smoothly. Probably too smoothly, but he paid no attention to it, and instead cursed and groaned as he walked with Yamamoto and Tsuna to school.

'Just one more day till winter break,' he chanted in his head. He growled in annoyance, feeling the heavy weight of his thoroughly soaked jeans already.

He hadn't been thinking about anything in particular when it happened, in fact he wasn't thinking at all, he was completely spaced out as he stepped off the sidewalk and into the street.

It was Yamamoto's loud yelling voice that had him turning around and ready to yell at the brunette for being so loud in the morning.

'Why is he yelling so loud?'

Green eyes meet terrified amber ones and he knew. He froze, his head turning slowly to what those wide amber eyes were staring. He felt like he was moving in slow motion when he finally saw it, the dark gray car that was speeding down the street towards him.

At that moment, millions of things went through his head, thoughts, dreams, feelings, memories, memories, memories, _his_ memories.

His father, sister, the nice lady playing the piano, his mother, Shamal, paper air planes, dynamite, explosions, Vix, the ninth, Reborn, Tsuna, Yamamoto, his friends, the Varia, his Vongola ring, Yamamoto, Gamma, Tsuna dead, Yamamoto making love to him, Lal, Irie, Spanner, Genkishi, Yamamoto, Byakuran, Uri, Yuni, Yamamoto moving his things into his apartment, Yamamoto, Yamamoto… They all meshed together, like a collage of memories flashing quickly through his mind. The last he remembered was the sound of a horn blaring followed by the sound of screeching tires, Yamamoto's screaming, before strong warm arms encircled around his chest, giving him a feeling of déjà vu, and yanked him backwards, sending him to the wet hard concrete with a thud.

"-udera!"

"Hayato! Hayato!" Yamamoto shook him roughly, in an attempt to wake him from his daze.

The silverette let a strangled gasp pass his lips as he curled into himself. He cradled his chest, which began tightening so painfully he felt as though he was suffocating.

"Hayato? Are you okay? Are you hurt?" Yamamoto's voice rang in his ears, he could feel his hot breath on him and his hands roaming his body, looking for any injuries.

"Yamamoto! Gokudera! Are you alright?" Tsuna's worried voice echoed behind around him.

Gokudera tried to speak, but his mouth gaped open and closed in his attempts with nothing coming out. He brought his hand to his chest, fisting his shirt tightly.

_I can't breathe, I can't breathe._

He felt himself start to panic and the adrenaline pulse through his veins quickly, setting his limbs on fire.

He didn't know if it was tears or raindrops that made their way down his face, and he didn't care, all he wanted was to breathe. He looked up to Yamamoto, gathering his full attention and gripping his arm tightly.

With one look at Gokudera's face Yamamoto knew exactly what was happening, he had seen it before after all. Gokudera was having a panic attack.

"Shit… He's having a panic attack," the brunette informed the smaller one, who hovered worriedly over the two.

"Hayato, breathe… just breathe…" Yamamoto attempted to sooth the gasping Italian, but to no avail.

The images that just went through Gokudera's mind was shock enough alone, but with the added near death experience, it proved to be too much for him to comprehend and process. He continued his grasp upon his shirt and Yamamoto's arm, but started when he felt Yamamoto's warm hand press against his chest. He looked up to the brunette, his eyesbrows scrunched together.

"Breathe, Hayato…" Yamamoto pushed his hand gently against Gokudera's chest.

They both still remained sitting upon the wet ground, and Gokudera could feel the cold water seeping through both his pants and boxers, making him shiver. "Breathe, just breath…" Gokudera's eyes remained locked with ambers ones, as it was actually helping in calming him. Minutes passed by before his breathing had finally returned to near normal.

"I should take him home…" Yamamoto mumbled to Tsuna, wrapping his arms around Gokudera's middle and gently helping him to his fit. Gokudera felt embarrassed, but all his energy seemed to have been taken up in his little episode, making him very sleepy.

"I'll help you…" Tsuna agreed, stepping forward and helping, taking Gokudera's other arm over his shoulders.

"Are you sure? you'll be late."

"That is hardly the point Yamamoto," Tsuna said sternly, a little offended that Yamamoto thought he would care more about being on time to school than Gokudera's well being.

"Thanks."

The silverette felt tired, drained and exhausted as he let the two brunettes support him down the street and back to their apartment, all of them equally soaked through and through as the rain had no intention of letting up anytime soon. The three teens had barely made it to the end of the sidewalk when a car, the said car that almost hit Gokudera, skidded around the corner and came to a halt in front of them, blocking their path across the street. After the incident, both Tsuna and Yamamoto had been too preoccupied with Gokudera's well being to give the car a second glance but, now, they were both wishing very much that they had done so. Both brunettes froze when the doors shot open and men dressed in nice black suits filed out. They were like deer caught in headlights and didn't even have time to defend themselves before they were jumped, all of them being grabbed roughly and pulled away from each other.

Yamamoto was yelling, trying to keep his grip on Gokudera, but was roughly pulled away and slammed to the ground. He could taste iron in his mouth as he hit the wet cement hard. He thrashed and struggled, only causing the three men on him to pull his arms further up and behind his back. He bit his lip, grimacing in pain.

Tsuna 'eep'ed and was pushed up against the wall, two guys holding him, he could feel the rough surface of the concrete wall cut through his cheek and warm liquid begin running down his chin. He cursed in his head, trying to wriggle free from their grasps, but they only pushed him harder up against the wall, making him whimper.

Gokudera was still dazed as he pushed to his knees, let out a soft whimper when his knees hit the hard concrete. He felt his arms get pulled behind him and held there. He hung his head low, inhaling and exhaling, trying to process the new situation. The sound of a car door opening and closing, followed by wet footsteps and the cocking of a gun, snapped the silverette from his daze like a slap to the face. He whipped his head up painfully fast, his eyes widening in horror in what he saw. There, standing in front of him, with the rain eagerly soaking his white suit and bright red hair, was Vix, with a giant sneer on his lips. But that wasn't what had Gokudera shocked the most, it was the rather large silver gun that was pointed in the exact center of Yamamoto's forehead.

From his side he could hear Tsuna gasping and pleading for Vix to put the gun down, like that was going to work. Vix's eyes narrowed at Gokudera, a large malicious grin spreading further across his face. Neither said a word, words weren't need in a moment like this, actions spoke far louder. Gokudera couldn't breathe again, he couldn't even fricking move, his wide eyes darted from Vix to the gun to Yamamoto.

The red head turned his head to look down at Yamamoto, who was pointedly staring right back at him, a hard blank look on his face. Vix's finger twitched on the trigger.

"W-wait!" Gokudera yelled, lurching forward, trying to pull himself from the random man's tight grip.

Vix's smile widened and he turned to Gokudera.

"L-let him go," Gokudera yelled, slightly choking on the rain that rolled off his face and into his mouth. "You wanted me, right? Well, take me then." His eyes hardened with determination, as they looked into Vix's yellow ones.

The redhead blinked nice and slow, his mind reeling in the fact that his simple plan had worked so smoothly. Gokudera was so predictable and easy to tease. When he opened his eyes, he couldn't help but widen his smile, and snapped his fingers. Gokudera growled as he was quickly pulled to his feet and drug backwards. He predictably struggled a bit, but was far too afraid to struggle further as the gun in Vix's hand still remained pointed at Yamamoto's head.

"NO! Hayato!" Yamamoto yelled, his voice high with panic. "HAYATO!"

"It's alright, Takeshi, we'll move your stuff in when I get back," Gokudera was barely able to get out before he was thrown into the backseat of the car.

None of his small struggles were able to stop them from tying his hands with rope, and taping his mouth tightly shut. Once inside the darkly tinted car, his eyes frantically looked out the window and was once again horrified as he watched several men kicking and punching both the Tenth and Yamamoto. That's when he really started to struggle, and sent his legs towards the men, connecting with a chest and an arm or two. He growled low in his throat, the tape over his mouth successfully silencing him as they pounced on him, pushing him flat on his stomach onto the seat.

He cursed himself when they had him successfully pinned down and was left with no other choice but to watch as punch after punch and kick after kick landed on both his friends' bodies. He felt tears well up in his eyes and couldn't stop them from overflowing. Again, it was all his fault again.

But even from inside the extremely tinted car he could have sworn that for a brief moment his eyes met amber ones, they stared at each other with a deep emotion before a hard hit to his head had him falling forward and losing consciousness.

* * *

**BetaClaymoreDarkAliciaComment**: Hah, The Return of the KingMemories! Gokudera has this splendid tendency to hurt himself. But I love him anyways. And this fic is great.

As always my dears tell me what you think^^

Anywho I hope you all enjoyed^^ Our fic is coming to an end soon, Im estimating about two maybe three chapters left!Im so sad yet so happy that I will be finishing my first fic:)

See you all next chapter! :D


	14. Chapter Thirteen: Captive

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**Beta:** ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Way short I know, but its much better than no update at all. It took me so long to get this out and Im so sorry. I promise to update soon and update with a much longer chapter when I do. Anywho I want to thank you all for all of you're reviews! 125 of them! Im so happy :) Anyways thank you all so much, and to you all who have added this to you're alert list. And now on with the chapter!

* * *

_Walking After You_

_Chapter Thirteen: Captive_

Yamamoto was seething, his hands clenched in tight fists at his sides as he paced back and forth in Tsuna's small room, curses flowing from his mouth endlessly.

"Y-yamamoto, please, calm down for a second–"

Tsuna attempted to calm the Rain Guardian but was cut short by a nasty glare from the irritated raven.

"Sit down kid, I can't treat your wounds when you're pacing like that." Shamal's voice was bored as he spoke.

"I don't give a shit about my wounds!" he snapped, yelling at the doctor as he cleaned some of the cuts on Tsuna's face. "We shouldn't be here! We need to find Hayato!" His voice raised higher and higher with each word that he spoke.

"Yama–"

"Yamamoto Takeshi, sit down," Reborn's stern voice spoke from the window, where he now stood. Yamamoto glared at the child hitman before he reluctantly took a seat next to Tsuna, crossing his arms like a pouting child.

Shamal muttered something under his breath and huffed as he began to finish what he had been previously attempting to do.

"Reborn!" Tsuna scolded. "Where have you been? Gokudera's bee–"

"I already know," Reborn interrupted, jumping off Tsuna's desk and onto the floor, standing in front of the three.

"What do you mean you already know?" both Tsuna and Yamamoto gasped loudly.

"I just received the information from my spies-"

"Those big bugs?"

"–when I was reading up on some information from the Ninth about Vix." Both boys, including Shamal, froze and looked to Reborn, their eyes eager and burning with curiosity.

"What did you find out?" Yamamoto snapped out uncharacteristically.

"It seems that at some point Vix and Gokudera knew each other when they were children," Reborn went on ignoring Yamamoto's rude and rushed tone. "It's easy to understand, they were both the sons of mafia families and shared an similar interest in explosives." To his side, Shamal quirked his head, trying to remember if he had ever met Vix before, since after all he did know Gokudera as a child. "But according to the Ninth, Gokudera was already with the Vongola at the time when they met. But it seems that shortly after their friendship became Vix's family had attempted to start a feud with the Vongola, and thus Vix challenged Gokudera to a battle."

"Ohh I remember that kid now, Hayato wiped the floor with him!" Shamal exclaimed, smiling at the memory of it, dripping rubbing alcohol onto Yamamoto's pants.

"Right," Reborn continued. "Because of the loss, his family had strict views and disowned him for his disgraceful loss. But it seems Vix's father is sick and failing fast, so they offered him a chance to redeem him self–"

"By killing Gokudera," Yamamoto finished the sentences for him in a rushed gasp.

"Precisely. We need to find Gokudera before it's too late."

Meanwhile in an unknown basement far from Namimori, Gokudera stirred from his recent unconscious state. When he finally came to and forced his eyes open, he found himself laying flat on his stomach, his hands tied tightly behind his back and his ankles secured just as tightly. He groaned in both annoyance and discomfort as to his position. His head throbbed, reminding him of how he became unconscious in the first place, he shifted slightly and could feel the now cool wetness of the blood that had ran down his neck from the hard hit to his head that he had received.

But what worried him was what had been of Yamamoto and Tsuna. The last glimpse he had of them was both of them catching their fair shares of punches from Vix's thugs. But what happened to them both? Were they here, with him, wherever that was?

'_Damn it all__,__' _he thought, looking around his surrounds. He was laying on a cool and jagged cobblestone floor, in what he guessed was a basement, since there were no windows, and the air felt stuffy and thick, making it hard for him to breath.

When he shifted his position further, he could feel that all his pockets had been emptied and even his Vongola ring had been removed.

Just what the hell was he supposed to do now? No dynamite, no ring. Things just couldn't get worse right?

Of course he couldn't be more wrong.

From somewhere behind him a door opened. It sounded heavy and the sound of metal scrapping against concrete made him cringe. As soon as the door had opened it slammed shut loudly, and was followed by heavy footsteps that got louder and louder. He tensed, craning his neck back as far as he could, searching for the owner of the footsteps. Soon the man came into view, he was tall and gangly like, dressed in an all black suit with a dark red tie, and had dark jet black hair that fell evenly to the middle of his chest. His eyes, or he should say eye, for the left one was covered by a black eye patch, was a bright violet color. Upon seeing Gokudera the man sneered at him, and moved around his figure to his front, hanging over him, causing Gokudera to crane his neck at a painful position to look up at him.

A sudden uneasy feeling came over Gokudera as he looked up to the man, whose face held a smirk that sent shivers down his spine.

"Gokudera Hayato." The man's voice was smooth and deep, he crouched down to get closer to his face and smiled widely. "I'm going to have a lot of fun with you."

"Oh yeah bastard, I'd like to see you try," he spat out, glaring up at the menacing figure. The man didn't speak, just smoothly got to his feet. The kick was so fast he didn't see it nor feel it, until he found himself across the room, slamming into the wall.

"Wh-what th-e he-hell… ow…" he gasped out, trying to catch his breath and tasting the blood that ran down from his nose.

"Was that _too_ fast for you? I'll go a little slower this time then," the man mused at him, his large grin making Gokudera sick to his stomach.

As quickly as he could, he curled his bound legs into his stomach, hoping it would shield him from the kick. But this time it came from the side, knocking the air right out of his lungs and sending him sprawling onto his opposite side.

He rolled onto his back, coughing and gasping. The man's footsteps echoed loudly around him, coming to a stop at his ear. Gokudera's eyes widened as the man's foot came speeding to his face. He closed his eyes, bracing himself for the hit.

But it never came. Instead, a gunshot echoed loudly through the empty room, followed by a loud thud from the side of him. He winced, feeling warm liquid hit his face and reluctantly peeled his eyes open. There, directly next to him laid the man, a gunshot wound in the exact center of his forehead bleeding freely.

"I told you not to touch him," Vix's voice growled, making Gokudera's eyes snapped to him. He stood in the doorway, the freshly fired gun in Vix's hand now pointing directly at him.

"Get up," he spat at Gokudera, his lips curling up into a sneer at him.

Gokudera did as he was told, but found he couldn't bring himself to stand, since he was bounded, both hands and legs. The redhead let out a sigh of irritation and walked to him, the gun still pointed to his face. In a swift movement he took hold of Gokudera and drug him to the other side of the room and roughly slammed him into the wall, making him grimace in pain.

Gokudera gasped lightly, all the air getting knocked from his lungs for the umpteenth time. Vix's free hand went into his pocket, pulling out a small pocket knife. He took Gokudera's restrained hands and cut the rope. But before Gokudera had any time to react, the gun was being shoved to his lips, the cold metal sending chills down Gokudera's spine.

"Don t even think about it," Vix's warned, his hand still gripping tightly onto one of Gokudera's. The said Italian gulped, he knew he couldn't make a move, and most certainly wouldn't dare with a gun practically shoved in his mouth. Vix smiled, knowing he had full control, and guided each one of Gokudera's hands into the chains that rested in the walls.

Once both of his hands were secured in there confines, he was pushed to the floor. He gritted his teeth when he hit the floor, the pain shooting though his arms and shoulders, giving just barely enough slack so he wouldn't be dangling from the wall. Curses slipped past his lips at the red head but they didn't seem to bother him, and he only smiled at the Italian.

"Get some rest. I'll come for you later." The gun moved from his lips only to come back at him in full force, successfully knocking him back into unconsciousness.

* * *

Dont hate me! I know its so short, sorry guys, but Ill update soon. I promise.

Leave a review and tell me what you think :)

See you next chapter!


	15. Chapter Fourteen: Imprisionment

**Warnings: **Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer**: I own nada

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera

**Beta: **ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **Forgive me! Immmmm sssooooo sorrrrryyyyy! My oh my have I been gone for so long, forgive me? I'm so sorry I've been quite busy and then I got writers block for this fic (GRRR!) so I'm sorry! This chapter is really short, mainly because I just wanted to get something out to you guys before I died of frustration. Anywho it's just a quick little transition that will hopefully help me on writing the next chappie Don't hate me please! Anywho I just wanna thank all of you who are still sticking with me! I love you! And to my beta who didn't give me grief for the crappiness of this chapter.

* * *

_Walking After You_

_Chapter Fourteen: Imprisonment_

The rain hit heavily the small window pane leading to the outside world. The only window in the cold dungeon like room he was confined to. The only sign he had of a passing day.

Gokudera stared blankly at the drops of water. A shiver ran through his body as a gust of cool air hit him. The rain poured relentlessly outside, making his confines, a badly insulated basement, cold as a freezer. Not to mention damp and wet. Water was constantly dripping from certain areas in the wall, one pointedly being directly by his left shoulder, soaking his entire left side and making it numb.

He shivered again, pulling his legs against his chest, hoping to gain some warmth from them. It had been at least four days, he estimated, since he had been chained up, and at least five since he had been captured. His arms had grown numb after several hours of his confines, leaving nothing but an ever so often dull ache at his joints. His fingers were freezing, but he had lost feeling in them long ago.

He rarely saw any of his imprisoners though. A different guy would come and feed him every morning and unchain him briefly to relieve himself in a small disgustingly dirty bathroom, but other than that he sat alone. Not that he minded one bit, he didn't feel like getting beat up again or watch a guy get his head blown off. He could still feel some the dried blood upon his face, from where the splatter had hit him.

He was a _mafioso_ though, he should be used to blood and gunshot. But he'd be lying if he said that it didn't scare the shit out of him. But if Vix had wanted him dead, he would have shot him then and there. He wanted something else from him. He wasn't entirely sure what that 'something' was, but he had a good idea: the only plausible thing coming to mind was a duel of some sort, as corny as it sounded. Vix wanted his honor back, and to get that it equaled taking away Gokudera's, and there was no way he was going to allow that to happen.

Being alone had one main benefit, and that was thinking.

Now that he finally had his memory back, it was hard to even believe that he had actually lost it in the first place. But now he could remember it all, the explosion, the hospital, and Yamamoto.

Oh Yamamoto, never in his life had he ever wanted to see his lover so badly. Was he okay? Was he looking for him? But most of all he just wanted to thank him for everything, everything he had done for him, when he himself couldn't remember him.

* * *

Twenty miles or so away Yamamoto Takeshi was sprinting down the side walk to Tsuna's house. He had gotten a call, just a short five minutes ago, from the hitman child, telling him they had found some possible information on where Gokudera could be. He didn't even knock when he reached the familiar door, and instead yanked it open, and ran up the stairs to the Vongola Bosses room.

He skidded to a halt in the doorway, gasping for air, while a startled and surprised Tsuna and Ryohei looked at him with wide eyes.

"Y-Yamamoto?" Tsuna exclaimed, in a half sit half standing position. "Are you alright?"

"Wow, Yamamoto, you're pretty fast. You should try out for the boxing team!" Ryohei exclaimed proudly, making a fist with his hand.

"O-of course I am," he snapped, catching his breath and stepping inside. "Reborn said that–"

"I found some info on a possible place where Gokudera could be," Reborn finished his sentence, jumping in from the open window.

"EH! You didn't say anything about that to me!" Tsuna jumped to his feet, angry that Reborn failed to tell him such a crucial piece of information.

"That's because I wanted to wait till all the family members were here to tell you," Reborn reasoned, jumping from the desk and onto the floor. Tsuna huffed and looked around the room.

"But what about Hibari?"

"Che," Hibari's monotone voice drawled from the doorway. "Hurry up and tell us, child. There is a herbivore I need to bite to death." All eyes turned to the door way, where a nonchalant Hibari rested, leaning up against the frame.

"Hi-Hibari!" Tsuna stuttered, his face flushing a shade of pink.

"Okay, everyone's here. Now spill it," Yamamoto interrupted before Hibari or anyone else had a chance to say anything.

"Not yet, we are still missing one person."

"Eh? Who?"

"He-he's ri-right here." Dino's blond mop of hair could barely be seen from behind Hibari. "Jeez Hibari, you could have waited for me at least." Dino stood giving the glaring raven a smile, before turning to Tsuna and the rest, giving them a smile as well.

"Okay _now_ that we all are here. I'll begin."

* * *

Sorry it's so short! Don't hate me plz!

Ill try and get in the mode more this week and get a chappie to you soon.

See you next chapter!


	16. Author's Note

**Warnings**: Rated M for violence, blood, boyxboy=Yaoi, swearing, OOC, Fluff, and lemon in later chapters! If ya don't like then please don't read.

**Disclaimer: **Gah don't I wish *pouts*

**Pairing: **YamamotoxGokudera 8059

**Beta:** ClaymoreDarkAlicia

**A/N: **

* * *

_**A**__**uthor's Note**_

Hello All! Sorry that this is not the update you thought it was. I'm so sorry I'm taking so long in completing this fic. My mind seems to have just lost everything that I wanted for this fic, so I'm trying to get that back right now.

So there's about two, to three chapters left, and how I would like to do it, is just update all those at once. So please be patient with me! I'm going to do my best to update and complete WAY by the end of this month!

Anywho I just wanted to let you all know that I haven't given up, or abandoned this fic! It will be completed I promise!

So please be patient and stick with me. Thank you!

KaoriVenna


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